Dating Mistakes Men Make
Dating mistakes will happen. Murphy's Law guarantees it. Larry took his vegetarian date to a steakhouse by mistake. Gene locked the keys in his car with the lights on. Allen forgot to reset his clock for daylight savings time and arrived an hour late for his bike ride with Claire. Blunders like these keep men awake before a big date.
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Since no one is perfect, some mishaps can't be avoided. That's why we emphasize becoming aware of the ones that can be avoided. An honest mistake will usually be forgiven; one that comes from insensitivity or selfishness may not be. Here are some things you can decide ahead of time to avoid:
Getting too physical too fast.
Physical attraction plays a big role for men in dating, but pushing a new relationship into sexual territory too soon is a big mistake that frequently backfires. This means potential partners must work to cultivate a sense of trust and mutual respect. A man might be eager to kiss on the first date, while the woman isn’t ready. A man might be “all hands” while the woman wishes he’d keep them to himself. Ere on the side of caution. Back off and give her the security that comes with knowing you can show restraint.
Talking too much and listening too little.
When a woman dates a man, she is asking herself, Will he see me for who I really am? Will he take my dreams, goals, and fears seriously? Many men supply the answer, all right, but not the one she was looking for. They talk and talk about themselves as if reading their resume. Here's a tip: There's no need to tell your date how wonderful you are. Let her discover it for herself. Instead, spend the evening asking insightful questions and listening to every word she says.
Rudeness.
Some men fail to realize that their date is looking for clues to how he will treat her in the way he deals with others. A man who barks at the waitress when something is not quite right -- or speaks condescendingly to the valet who parks the car, or tells a hurtful joke -- better not count on a second date.
Flirting with other women.
On a date, a woman wants to feel she has your undivided attention. No matter how discreet you think you are, when you "check out" other women in the room, she will notice. It sends a clear signal you are not interested primarily in her, but are keeping your options open. To avoid this mistake, make sure your eyes stay focused on your date and mind stays focused on what she says.
You don’t need to be perfect to be like able. And she probably won’t mind if you need to ask for directions, or end up at a bad movie. But just avoiding these common dating mistakes will certainly to make a great first impression and boost your odds of creating a lasting relationship.
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43 Comments View this thread in our community
seekerd
February 13,2011 at 11:31 amAre you for real? I don't know about you but I don't ever approach a woman with the idea of being "interviewed". If anything I do the interviewing:).
In spite of the widespread feminization of the American male, I think men still hold a very significant sway over relationships. Whether it proceeds, how quickly it does and ultimately if a marriage even takes place. Of course women do hold the power of the last response. But they can't respond to a question that was never asked.
EtotheD123
December 2,2010 at 05:47 am1. Showing way too much interest.
2. Allowing her to talk the entire time and encouraging it by firing off question after question, not allowing her to ask any questions.
3. Paying for a lavish meal and entertainment.
4. Driving 100+ miles to meet his date in her hometown while she drives around the corner to meet him.
5. Shrugging off signs that she's bored with him or doesn't like him...before the bill comes.
These are sure-fire ways to not only not get a second date, but spend $150 and have a long drive home in the process.
kazell09
July 6,2009 at 11:47 ameHarmony.com, tell me something I DON'T know....
These are more general BIG mistakes that men should not do. I think a guy would be a complete idiot if they did not know this.
tbesq
April 24,2009 at 03:42 pmDoublek52, that's brutal. I don't know whether the laugh or cry at that one. That's an honest mistake, but honestly that's a "grave" mistake too. Don't forget that emoticon next time!
prsnkty
April 24,2009 at 02:28 pmWhen the author of the article writes, "Ere on the side of caution,"do you think he or she really meant, "Ere on the sighed of caution"?
jayjay
April 21,2009 at 02:58 pmHey...jerseyguy didn't say in WHICH 5-10 seconds a woman decides if she likes a man or not. They needn't be the FIRST 5-10 seconds. They could be the 5-10 seconds when he's telling her the reasons he lied on his profile.
DancingFool
April 21,2009 at 02:48 pmI'm sorry, but the fact that she did not get the rather obvious joke and freaked out is kind of funny. Perhaps she is not as great a loss as you seem to think........
doublek52
April 21,2009 at 10:06 amAn honest mistake will usually be forgiven; one that comes from insensitivity or selfishness may not be. Look out for these common dating mistakes men make!
I made a huge mistake...Met a girl that was just so perfect for me ..She was everything I was looking for...We met a couple of times and seem to really hit it off..She sent me an E-mail that she was looking for a commitment and wasn't sure if I was looking long term... She thought it would be better if she didn't waste my time...I called her and talked to her and told her that I was serious about looking for a long term relationship. She told me that we could meet again on Sun. and I should E-mail her where to meet... Well,,,, I E-mailed her and said to meet at the airport and we could fly to Vegas and get married.. I meant it to be funny & cute....She got spooked and immediately closed me out... I am unable to contact her because she thinks I'm a nut or a stalker... I feel so bad that it ended this way...I'm sure she is just trying to protect herself and I must of really scared her... Lesson to be learned... Make sure you are sure you want to send something and use LOL or J/K....I felt we really had potential but I don't blame her......
Jacquiem
April 21,2009 at 09:38 amI gotta laugh at this process, because if I don't, I'll be crying all the time. Or in the psych ward...
wordwoman
April 21,2009 at 09:31 amYou do make me laugh. And, you're dead on, especially about thosetable manners and you have to wonderif anyone is handling the home training anymore.
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