colocha32005 is offline colocha32005 Post #81  December 4,2009, 1:34pm
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Well, because I'm afraid to be vulnerable again.
2nd, I'm healing from a bad relationship
3rd, I'm not interested in the ones who are pursuing me...
I take full responsability for being single for the past 6 years.
Last edited by colocha32005; December 4,2009 at 1:43pm.
 
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RNgoof is offline RNgoof Post #82  December 6,2009, 1:29pm
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Dishes are done

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Honestly, I'm not sure. I've had people tell me I'm intimidating at 1st impression. Don't judge a book by it's cover.
 
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WeDesignOurLives is offline WeDesignOurLives Post #83  December 6,2009, 6:05pm
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colocha32005 wrote :
Well, because I'm afraid to be vulnerable again.
2nd, I'm healing from a bad relationship
3rd, I'm not interested in the ones who are pursuing me...
I take full responsability for being single for the past 6 years.
Posts like this are just plain 'hall of fame' material to me.

So very honest and responsible. This to me is a person who's committed to a great life and might just get it.
 
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WeDesignOurLives is offline WeDesignOurLives Post #84  December 6,2009, 6:06pm
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RNgoof wrote :
Honestly, I'm not sure. I've had people tell me I'm intimidating at 1st impression. Don't judge a book by it's cover.
Are you trying to impress or being defensive or something else?
 
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mdredhead is offline mdredhead Post #85  December 7,2009, 3:05pm
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is happy.

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As I am getting older, I find myself not willing to settle for a man who is just "interested" in me. Things a man does that I would tolerate while I was younger, I don't tolerate anymore. My son needs to see his mother with a man who is worth having in our lives or he needs to see me alone. I have also had a lot going on in my life the last couple of years and have gotten used to being with my son. He rocks! Don't want to stay single forever though, God didn't intend for it to be this way.
 
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Nylit is offline Nylit Post #86  December 26,2009, 9:30pm
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ming_on_mongo wrote :
You probably have a good analysis there, Nylit. And growing up in a family where everyone pretty much had to "fend for themself", I'm probably especially "tone deaf" and "challenged" in the "needs" department anyway. Thanks, I'll give it some thought! And send me your bill, Doctor (do you take "plastic"?)!

Free for you my friend.
I think what most of us need is someone who needs us but not in a grasping needy way. You can sense this sometimes and it pulls you in. However, we sometimes forget to let go and let ourselves feel that pull.
We did this when we were young,, we were so accepting then,, I guess baggage and life lessons dull our senses at times.
 
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ming_on_mongo is offline ming_on_mongo Post #87  December 26,2009, 10:51pm
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-Seattle transplant to NorCal... hmmm, sun good!

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mdredhead wrote :
As I am getting older, I find myself not willing to settle for a man who is just "interested" in me. Things a man does that I would tolerate while I was younger, I don't tolerate anymore. My son needs to see his mother with a man who is worth having in our lives or he needs to see me alone. I have also had a lot going on in my life the last couple of years and have gotten used to being with my son. He rocks! Don't want to stay single forever though, God didn't intend for it to be this way.
FYI, if you do a search of the Groups here, you'll find there are several threads that deal with the unique issues of dating among single parents, as seen from both sides.
 
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serenity737 is offline serenity737 Post #88  December 27,2009, 1:30pm
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I tend to be shy at first.

I am much more interested in a long-term committed relationship than a short-term sexual one.

Difficult to find someone I click with. Psychologically I operate in a different gear than most. I am an identical twin and although many people find that interesting, very few actually can understand what this kind of very close relationship really is like. Also I am a divergent creative thinking with a near-photographic memory. I find unless I dumb myself down many people are intimidated by my smarts. Dumbing myself down is something I am not willing to do anymore.
(I'm glad to find in this discussion group there is intelligent life in the Universe)

I have been told in the past by certain women I am "too nice" and they prefer more of the "bad boy" type.

I wouldn't want someone I love to be subject to the destructive crap some of my family members can pull at times. This has become much less of an issue over time as I have set very firm limits on what is acceptable to me.

Most importantly, I don't want to get hurt again. I would prefer to be on my own than to invest in a relationship which I know will end up in a painful way. Loss of someone I love is something I have experienced and this kind of tragedy is painful for me.

Enough said. I remain an optimist, open to finding a woman with spirit and passion for living life fully will challenge me as Lincoln put it towards "the better angels of our nature."

Mike
 
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Nicomacheus is offline Nicomacheus Post #89  December 27,2009, 10:17pm
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Some people--perhaps very few, actually--simply do not require a partner, need a partner, want a partner or can handle/deal with a partner. Perhaps that's all for the best.
Last edited by Nicomacheus; December 27,2009 at 10:21pm.
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #90  December 28,2009, 8:22am
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.....yes, she.....Sweeps past softly, without a sigh.....

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Widowed a year. That's my excuse.

Hope it doesn't put a damper on the conversation!

If it helps.....I'm getting there.....

j8a
 
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