SabineDeWinter is offline SabineDeWinter Post #1  August 14,2009, 7:01pm
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Wow! It's been so long since I've been online, I feel like a shut in that just stepped into the the summer sun. I am in the process of getting a divorce, and wanted to know, what are the top fifty signs of a bad mate?
I just wish to know if my arguments hold water. THank you, everyone! P.S. You don't have to list 50 all at once. Your top five will suffice.
 
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justjbk is offline justjbk Post #2  August 18,2009, 11:41am
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First off, you don't need OUR advice to make sure that the divorce you're going through is justified. If you know deep down that divorce is the only option, you're doing the right thing.
But, just because I hate asking a question and not getting an answer:

1. Abuse. Psychological/Sexual/Financial/Physical
2. Immaturity
3. Cheating
4. Irresponsibility
5. Selfishness

Those are mine, anyway. And really, only the top two make sense because everything else that could possibly make a bad mate can pretty much be put into either Abuse or Immaturity, as far as I'm concerned. And of course, my list doesn't include Psychiatric issues that lead to criminality and a scary ass spouse.
Good luck with everything!
J.
 
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cherrybombsnfireworks is offline cherrybombsnfireworks Post #3  August 31,2009, 9:48pm
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since its not easy to recognize abusive people at first i'ld say, forget what to avoid look for these traits.
1 values and respects what you have to say, doesn't try to correct everything, admires your thought process, wants your opinion
2 respects your decisions- may ask for explanations, but won't try to change your mind, may ask you to do other wise, but won't make you feel bad about it ect.
3 doesn't mind if you can't have sex for a while... cause then you know he likes you not just your butt or that kinky way you chew bubble gum and kick your feet
4 calls just cause he misses you, but not often enough to be checking on your every move, doesn't need an itinerary
5 he lets you like what you like, and vice versa but not everything, you have alot in common, but you both explore each others obscure to you interests as well
6 honest, kind, giving, patient


i met alot of guys and its easy to list bad traits, and if you avoid some you'll always find a new set you completely missed, i keep learning that

but these are the traits every lady wants and should have, and every good guy does; so forget about what to avoid, and think... if he was a chick would i still like him, if the answer is no kiss him good bye, if yes, well congrats cause if he is hot too what more could you want... except if he is
AVOID: after getting to know him

the reasonable next step in the relationship avoider, refuser, lets hold off with no end in sight type
basically commitment phobic
 
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Diann1950 is online now Diann1950 Post #4  September 1,2009, 2:13pm
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1. Sarcastic, biting comments.
2. Stubborn, unwilling to compromise.
3. Too busy for you
4. Racist
5. Intolerant
 
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CreolePrincess is offline CreolePrincess Post #5  September 1,2009, 4:29pm
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It is so complicated, ya'll, and it doesn't even have to be.

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1. Belittling
2. Manipulative
3. Impatient
4. Intolerant
5. Alcholic
6. Arrogant
7. Selfish
8. Narrowminded
9. Ignorant
10. Petty
11. No ambition (e.g., no desire to set any type of personal goals and make any real attempt to achieve them)
12. Non-passionate
13. Noncommunicative
14. Boring
15. Stuck in the past
16. Unfaithful
17. Vulgar
18. Psychotic
19. Antisocial
20. Negative

Is there a limit to how many we can list?
 
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tiara2161 is offline tiara2161 Post #6  September 3,2009, 2:49pm
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Unfortunately I have been in some bad relationships. Here are some things that might seem small, but I wish I didn't overlook them before. This is just my experience, I'm not saying everyone who has these qualities is a bad guy.
1. Really jealous
2. Refers to other girls as b*tches or other names
3. History of drug addiction
4. Criminal record
5. Lies about little things
6. Has never been in a serious relationship before
7. Job history shows they change jobs a lot
8. Overly picky about girls they date
9. Underly picky (no standards, ideas of what they want or are looking for in a girl)
 
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WeDesignOurLives is offline WeDesignOurLives Post #7  September 4,2009, 5:25pm
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1. Still quotes Seinfeld.
2. Doesn't drive (has no good reason not to)
3. Thinks that 'women are unfair' or evil or something like that.
4. Asks a woman her measurements (It's unreal how many times I've heard men do this...it's impossibly crazy this occurs.)
 
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