fireheart35 is offline fireheart35 Post #1  August 18,2009, 12:05pm
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Hi,

I need guidance and direction...

I recently graduated with a degree in a feild that I love working in ...I worked towards this for 6 years. I got a diplomia before and then did courses while working in the field to go back for my degree. I got my first job under that title but recently lost the job due to a mistake I made with my registration which is no longer a problem. It was corrected and registration was fixed within days after discovery. However, I was treated like scum and lost my job.
I was humiliated and ashamed!

I never applied for another jobs. It has been 6 months. But now I have to start looking for work. However, I am afraid and anxiety ridden.

I am so angry with my last boss that I don't ever want to go through something like this again. However, I don't want to give up and chose another career. I want to try once more.

How do I over come my fears and anxieties to go send out my resumes and go to an interview?


Help!
 
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LifeRebuilder is offline LifeRebuilder Post #2  August 19,2009, 12:08am
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fireheart35 wrote :
Hi,

I need guidance and direction...

I recently graduated with a degree in a feild that I love working in ...I worked towards this for 6 years. I got a diplomia before and then did courses while working in the field to go back for my degree. I got my first job under that title but recently lost the job due to a mistake I made with my registration which is no longer a problem. It was corrected and registration was fixed within days after discovery. However, I was treated like scum and lost my job.
I was humiliated and ashamed!

I never applied for another jobs. It has been 6 months. But now I have to start looking for work. However, I am afraid and anxiety ridden.

I am so angry with my last boss that I don't ever want to go through something like this again. However, I don't want to give up and chose another career. I want to try once more.

How do I over come my fears and anxieties to go send out my resumes and go to an interview?


Help!

I feel you should start with first defining your fear and anxieties and then look at some ways to work through them so you can get back out there with the feeling of confidence and do not have to feel uncomfortable at an interview. The first thing that I would like to share is that fear acts as a protective reaction when we face real danger. Fear triggers the release of adrenaline in the body that prepares us for action often called fight or flight. It is important to determine whether you are living in a constant state of fearfulness or if this is just about the one particular situation. Anxiety stems from uncertainty hoping something will happen but having no guarantee that it will, or fearing something will happen, but having no control over whether it will or not. Anxiety can lead to a disorder when it becomes so intense that it dominates a person’s thoughts, feelings, actions, and preventing you from living a normal life. Without knowing, all of the details if you feel you are at this state or close then I would seek professional help before it does start to take control over your entire life. Do you have panic attacks or is it just when thinking about looking for a job. Has there been anything else in your past that may have caused you to be susceptible to having fear and anxiety over other things in your life? I feel it is important for you to determine if this is normal fear or abnormal fear. With abnormal fear, the level of fear a person feels is way out of proportion to the actual situation and it may be unrelated to the situation. A person’s perception of a situation determines whether or not fear will rule. Knowing the truth and then acting on it is critical to conquering fear. The source of truth is the one who does not lie and the first step in applying truth is to identify the false assumption behind the fears you are experiencing and to replace them with the truth. Try to use positive affirmations such as that was then and this is now. You have done the hard work and you know what you have to offer. You just have to remember so when you go to an interview you will have the confidence so you will be convinced of what you have to offer that person. It is time to remember what you worked so hard to do and put the feelings of ashamed in the past. It does not matter anymore what happen if you can look forward to having the job you want. I am sure when you went to that first interview you felt proud of what you had accomplished and now it is time to have that same feeling. You should be proud of what you have accomplished no matter what happened. I know deep down somewhere you must still have that feeling and it is just time to remember it and use it again. If you try the affirmation and feel that the fear and anxiety is just more then you can handle then please let me know but I do feel you can get back that feeling of accomplishment from what you described. I hope that this information has helped in some way and if you need anything else feel free to send me an e-mail.
Thanks,
LRB
 
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WeDesignOurLives is offline WeDesignOurLives Post #3  August 25,2009, 9:35pm
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fireheart35 wrote :
I was humiliated and ashamed!

I never applied for another jobs. It has been 6 months.

Help!

Shame can be so incredibly paralyzing. It shakes me to the bone sometimes.

But obviously you need to move forward and by you own admission, 6 months, you need some help.

I think, regardless of the very nice answer from lifeReuilder, you need to get help one-on-one. Perfectly fine to see some opinions here but in the end you've got to get in a room, alone with someone, and just do whatever needs to be done, because once you do that first session you will have evidence that this does NOT have to paralyze you any more. People just do have sh*t happen to them in life and somehow (99% through just plain persistence) they get back on the horse and find reason for unconditional self-love.
 
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