LifeRebuilder is offline LifeRebuilder Post #1  July 27,2009, 4:05pm
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Does anyone ever wonder how they reached the age they are (for me, it's 55) without a partner in their life? I was married a LONG time ago, and was then in a live-with relationship for several years, but it's been over 20 years since I've been in a committed, loving relationship. I don't think I'm boring or unattractive or unsocial or _____, but I don't seem to meet men who are available & (to me) attractive/interesting. I try to get out to do various "group" things, such as going to dances, concerts, charity functions, parties, bike rides, but nothing seems to 'happen'. I don't attend church, since that's not something I am comfortable with (organized religion). There's got to be something I'm just not doing or going to or....? Any suggestions?
 
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LifeRebuilder is offline LifeRebuilder Post #2  July 27,2009, 4:41pm
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LifeRebuilder wrote :
Does anyone ever wonder how they reached the age they are (for me, it's 55) without a partner in their life? I was married a LONG time ago, and was then in a live-with relationship for several years, but it's been over 20 years since I've been in a committed, loving relationship. I don't think I'm boring or unattractive or unsocial or _____, but I don't seem to meet men who are available & (to me) attractive/interesting. I try to get out to do various "group" things, such as going to dances, concerts, charity functions, parties, bike rides, but nothing seems to 'happen'. I don't attend church, since that's not something I am comfortable with (organized religion). There's got to be something I'm just not doing or going to or....? Any suggestions?fficeffice" />

Vettopet,
I do not understand why your message was moderated and closed and I am sorry for that so I tried to copy it so others would be able to respond. I do not see any undesirable information in this message for it to be closed. After reading your message I do have some questions that might help for me to give you an opinion on why you are in this situation. You mentioned you were married before and I did not know if you would like to share some of the information which led to the end of that relationship. You mentioned you were in a committed relationship but you do not seem to meet men that are available and interesting. Does that mean they are in relationships or that you are not wanting to be in a committed relationship with them. Also does that mean they are not emotionally ready to be in a committed relationship. It sounds as though you are doing the right things by getting out and trying to meet people which is something that I would suggest but you did not mention if you have joined any dating sites. I know there is complaining about the matching process but with all the complaints I still think that you have a good chance at getting a small number of matches that you could be compatible with. The last thing I wanted to mention was as with the matching system sometimes we may receive a match that we think is not for us but as we get to know the person better it turns out that you have more in common then you might think. So if you have not tried any dating sites that might be the next option for you. You asked there is got to be something I am not doing and my response would be it is possible that you are just not opening yourself up to possibilities. What I mean by that statement is for example when I first started on EH I had it set in my mind that I did not want to date a man that was over six feet tall. So I would close out the other matches because I did not want to waste their time or mine. Once I realized by limiting myself to what I thought was best for me and putting it into someone else's hands I met someone that was 6'3". We are now planning out future together and that would have never occurred if I kept my mind set on what I thought was best for me. Maybe you just need to open yourself up to other possibilities and see what happens. I hope sharing some of that information has helped and if you have any other questions please feel free to send me an e-mail.
Thanks,
LRB
 
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