lacedwithhope is offline lacedwithhope Post #1  September 8,2009, 8:25pm
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dog slimed!

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Years ago on a whim, I signed up alone (a milestone in itself) for an Italy ski trip I read about in the LA times. That my ex-husband would never have agreed to a trip like that, was just an added perk.

Of our tour group of 50, three guys were from my general area, and their skiing ability matched mine, so we hit the slopes together that week. Despite my having no interest in dating any of them (too soon after my divorce), we exchanged numbers on the flight home. A few weeks later, I got a call from one of them (a physician) who invited me to his house to see the photos of the trip. And dinner.

At least that night, dinner at his home was an elaborate affair: he had either taken the entire day off to cook (unlikely), or had some fancy place cater it (more likely) and disguised it as his own creation. Candles, fine china, real silverware. And in this bachelor's home, cardboard boxes didn't double as his coffee table and end tables. There was even dessert!

I'd been away from the dating circuit for ... let's see ... 17 years ... so it took me awhile to realize the photos weren't the only thing he was interested in sharing that night.

So when he moved toward me with the intention of kissing, I did what any medical professional would do -- I requested a second opinion. I pulled out my lower lip and asked him if he thought my canker sore had healed yet. My tactical move was not only effective, but it didn't hurt his feelings, either.

Does anyone have a funny story about successfully avoiding a kiss -- Keepers? Huzzies?
Last edited by lacedwithhope; September 8,2009 at 8:35pm.
 
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angelpoet is offline angelpoet Post #2  September 8,2009, 9:19pm
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is still out there

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my one and only eHarmony date went in for a kiss WITHOUT
any invitation or indication to do so after the date...
I almost forgot what to do.... last minute ditch...
turned my head... so he got a cheek...
he was so disappointed and stated so in a VERY lengthy email afterwards...whew!
 
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lacedwithhope is offline lacedwithhope Post #3  September 8,2009, 9:34pm
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dog slimed!

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angelpoet wrote :
my one and only eHarmony date went in for a kiss WITHOUT
any invitation or indication to do so after the date...
I almost forgot what to do.... last minute ditch...
turned my head... so he got a cheek...
he was so disappointed and stated so in a VERY lengthy email afterwards...whew!
"She's a heartbreaker, check it and see
She's got a fever of a hundred and three
Come on baby, do you do more than dance?
She's heartbreaker, heartbreaker"

Wait. Or, is it hot blooded?
 
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Trikster is offline Trikster Post #4  September 8,2009, 10:12pm
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- has been told to put my mind back into the gutter...

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Squirrel!!! (honestly, it was a squirrel...ran up my leg and jumped from my shoulder into a bush.) I got up and chased after it, threw what was left of my ice cream cone at it. Missed by a mile. The girl, well, when I jerked as the squirrel used me as a launching platform, I ended up dumping the ice cream on her overly exposed cleavage. She had seen the squirrel, but it didn't matter, she ran off flame red and pi$$ed off. Got a curt txt message later. Thank God! She was more than a little scary, had no idea she was interested in me, in that way. I honestly had thought she was a Cherry Chapstick girl.
 
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lacedwithhope is offline lacedwithhope Post #5  September 9,2009, 8:57pm
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dog slimed!

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Wow, that's quite a story Trikster! Nice going shoving that ice cream cone down the Cherry Chapstick girl's cleavage. And just WHY was it 'overly exposed?' LOL

I'm surprised no one else has posted here -- am I only one (besides AP) who doesn't want to kiss guys I'm not attracted to? Are you saying I should become more opportunistic? Should I should lower my standards? Would I'd be a better kisser if I had no standards?
Last edited by lacedwithhope; September 9,2009 at 9:44pm.
 
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ThePriestess is online now ThePriestess Post #6  September 9,2009, 11:15pm
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Trikster wrote :
Squirrel!!! (honestly, it was a squirrel...ran up my leg and jumped from my shoulder into a bush.) I got up and chased after it, threw what was left of my ice cream cone at it.
Isn't it part of the rules that you need to get to first base before trying to steal home?
 
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Trikster is offline Trikster Post #7  September 10,2009, 6:51pm
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lacedwithhope wrote :
Wow, that's quite a story Trikster! Nice going shoving that ice cream cone down the Cherry Chapstick girl's cleavage. And just WHY was it 'overly exposed?' LOL
Just how she was. First time I met her, she was wearing this silk tank top thing and some tight little shorts. The shorts said chick magnet and she was hanging all over one of her girlfriends. Her cleavage kept popping out and her friend often gave her a hand getting them back in. So I thought she played for the same team...

ThePriestess wrote :
Isn't it part of the rules that you need to get to first base before trying to steal home?
None of the rules I play by have that little bit in them.
 
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hogrally is offline hogrally Post #8  September 10,2009, 9:01pm
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when it rain its pours.... menzzzz

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He was sick and I was tired....then we were both tired...then I was sick and he was tired.... Hmmmm...
Beer breath at night or morning breath....6 hours later... Now that I think about it I usually Skip first...and just get home as quick as you can. yes I did fully intend the double meaning there....
 
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winn is offline winn Post #9  September 10,2009, 10:11pm

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I can't remember the last time I ditched a kiss? I guess I'm a kissy sort of person to begin with. I have dodged kissing when it comes to relatives. I don't think I should be expected to kiss someone just because I'm related to them.
 
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winn is offline winn Post #10  September 10,2009, 10:13pm

Please tell me where I can find a normal man???

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Trikster wrote :
Squirrel!!! (honestly, it was a squirrel...ran up my leg and jumped from my shoulder into a bush.) I got up and chased after it, threw what was left of my ice cream cone at it. Missed by a mile. The girl, well, when I jerked as the squirrel used me as a launching platform, I ended up dumping the ice cream on her overly exposed cleavage. She had seen the squirrel, but it didn't matter, she ran off flame red and pi$$ed off. Got a curt txt message later. Thank God! She was more than a little scary, had no idea she was interested in me, in that way. I honestly had thought she was a Cherry Chapstick girl.
I laughed so hard when I read this that I almost choked on my Nacho chips. And everytime I go back and read it again, I'm still cracking up l;aughing. I can just picture the whole thing in my mind. Thanks for the laugh Trikster.
 
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