ActionSoftGuy is offline ActionSoftGuy Post #1  July 29,2009, 1:23pm
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I was flipping channels the other night, and came across this show called Dating in the Dark. The premise is that 3 guys and 3 gals are introduced to each other in a room with no lights, and they can talk or do whatever they want, and then after a series of "dates" decide who of the other 3 they want to see. The idea of course is to see if a connection made prior to observing physical appearance can override lack of physical attraction if the attraction is not there once the person sees what the other one looks like.

In any case, in the episode I saw part of, one of the women was really good looking, and a Christian. She ended up being interested in a guy who was "spiritual, but not associated with any particular religion." Or maybe not even all that spiritual. She said "Jesus Christ is my foundation" from the get-go, first date, and asked him what his views were. He was honest. And here's where the dumb part comes in (I'm sure you can guess where this is going): she continued to be interested in him, and in fact started developing a bit of excitement/infatuation for him.

At the conclusion of the episode, after seeing what the other person looks like, both parties have the decision to either proceed with the other person, or walk away. So our Christian girl writes this note to the guy to express all her feelings, and is all excited to see him, and... get this... he talks to the camera about how he might actually walk away, but for the right reasons... i.e. the premise of the show is that you base your decision on what matters, not on looks, so while he was totally attracted to her, he felt they might not align on the things that really matter in their lives, particularly for her. And he did end up walking away, much to her disappointment.

Now this is quite rare. Usually unbelieving men will pose as believers, and come to church with her, and do whatever they think they have to do, to get the girl. But I thought it was interesting how the unbeliever in this case actually showed a good deal of sense, while (and all too typically) the Christian plays the idiot. Where's the wisdom here? What was she thinking? That she'd win him over to Christ, then marry him?

Ugh.

-Vern
 
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last12C is offline last12C Post #2  July 29,2009, 2:05pm
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ActionSoftGuy wrote :
I was flipping channels the other night, and came across this show called Dating in the Dark. The premise is that 3 guys and 3 gals are introduced to each other in a room with no lights, and they can talk or do whatever they want, and then after a series of "dates" decide who of the other 3 they want to see. The idea of course is to see if a connection made prior to observing physical appearance can override lack of physical attraction if the attraction is not there once the person sees what the other one looks like.

In any case, in the episode I saw part of, one of the women was really good looking, and a Christian. She ended up being interested in a guy who was "spiritual, but not associated with any particular religion." Or maybe not even all that spiritual. She said "Jesus Christ is my foundation" from the get-go, first date, and asked him what his views were. He was honest. And here's where the dumb part comes in (I'm sure you can guess where this is going): she continued to be interested in him, and in fact started developing a bit of excitement/infatuation for him.

At the conclusion of the episode, after seeing what the other person looks like, both parties have the decision to either proceed with the other person, or walk away. So our Christian girl writes this note to the guy to express all her feelings, and is all excited to see him, and... get this... he talks to the camera about how he might actually walk away, but for the right reasons... i.e. the premise of the show is that you base your decision on what matters, not on looks, so while he was totally attracted to her, he felt they might not align on the things that really matter in their lives, particularly for her. And he did end up walking away, much to her disappointment.

Now this is quite rare. Usually unbelieving men will pose as believers, and come to church with her, and do whatever they think they have to do, to get the girl. But I thought it was interesting how the unbeliever in this case actually showed a good deal of sense, while (and all too typically) the Christian plays the idiot. Where's the wisdom here? What was she thinking? That she'd win him over to Christ, then marry him?

Ugh.

-Vern
To be honest, Vern, I think the scenario you describe has more to do with male vs female rather than unbeliever vs believer. Women are more vulnerable to getting sucked into the romance of a thing rather than focusing on the practicalities of it. The intriguing appeal of star-crossed lovers far preceded Romeo & Juliet. What you saw was only the beginning. It is very likely that once the romance had run its course the lady in question would probably have come to her senses. I have been in that situation myself. The music swells and the emotions instinctively respond, but as soon as the chorus is over the brain comes back on line. I would encourage you not to reach conclusions based on a mere snippet of reality. What I dislike so much about these types of 'reality' shows is that they are designed to highlight the worst of people, delighting in the public humiliation and heartbreak of people.
Last edited by last12C; July 29,2009 at 2:08pm.
 
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blessedinNC is offline blessedinNC Post #3  July 29,2009, 6:47pm
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This story is sad on so many levels...

I have to agree with you Val. While both men and women tend to overlook far too many things when they get caught up in the moment, when it comes to matters of faith women do seem very quick to compromise (and yes, I've got some experience there too ).

Personally, I haven't joined the ranks of those who have carried that compromise all the way to the altar (thankfully God has always put those circumstances in my path that cause these differences to come front and center). Though I've seen a lot of women who keep those blinders on and end up with someone who does not share their faith. I hope this will be a wake up call for the woman on the show.

As for reality shows - I wonder if she had been the one to say no and had made a stand for her faith would they have even included that in the show? You know they had a lot more clips and likely more couples that could have been put in what made it on the air. I tend to agree with you that those shows are designed to make sure the very worst of someone makes it into every episode.
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waltercl is offline waltercl Post #4  July 30,2009, 11:33pm
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I saw that episode. It highlighted to me why you have to make sure in advance that both people share certain values. If he did not share her personal beliefs and place the same degree of importance on them then why in the world would she want to get into something anyway?
 
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last12C is offline last12C Post #5  July 31,2009, 12:07am
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GOOD GRIEF, folks! It is a TV show - designed to get people all riled up. The mystery. The unknown. The taboo. Oooooo! exciting! It's not like they were in a relationship. If this gal really was dedicated to her faith she would have gotten her head on straight once the hormones died down. It is absolutely absurd to assume that she was going to bail on her faith over some guy she met in a dark room.
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waltercl is offline waltercl Post #6  July 31,2009, 3:58am
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I don't think that was her intention. I think she probably just thought the idea of the show sounded cool so she'd give it a try. I think once she was in the process she was hoping the guy would respond and want to go on a date just because once you're on the show you don't want to be left hanging at the end.

If anything it was a good learning experience for her (and other Christians who watched) that you need to make sure you have certain things in common with someone (like your personal faith) before you try to get into a relationship.

I gave the show one look, and I wasn't impressed at all. It appears to me to be just another hook-up show that really belongs somewhere like MTV.
 
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