He charged his wife interest.??? Men what do you think?


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ngawildflower is offline ngawildflower Post #1  July 21,2009, 6:28am
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I'd like anyone's thoughts but especially you men. I'm seeing this man I met on eH. Frugal is not the word! One of my can't stand is the "must not be so cheap as to be impractical". I think he fits the bill on this but obviously he doesn't see himself this way. He will walk 2 blocks to keep from paying $2 to park. Won't eat out without a coupon, etc... Now I am very frugal, shop sales, look for bargains and use coupons when I can but I don't go this far. Now this has recently come up - He mentioned that in his previous marriage that his wife needed a car and rather than her getting a bank type loan he loaned her the money to buy it so that she wouldn't have to pay the high bank interest. But he kinda quitely and slyly mentioned that he also charged her interest (though not nearly as much as the bank would have) and made her put it all in writing and sign it. This stunned me. I can understand if they had separate finances that he might have loaned her his money and expected her to pay him back but I have to admit that I was shocked that he would charge his own wife ANY interest at all! My ex, for all his other warts, would have bought me the darn car! He certainly would have never thought of charging me interest even if he had loaned me money!
Is this a red flag that this guy is selfish and has money issues???? I feel like I'm asking a stupid question but men - how do you think and feel about this? Thanks for your responses in advance!
 
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1Horselady is offline 1Horselady Post #2  July 21,2009, 9:06pm
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I hope you can handle a response from another woman. WOW!! I hope you dropped this guy like the HOT POTATO he was! Although he might help you SAVE money, I don't think he would ever be someone's DREAM DATE(NIGHTMARE is more like it). So, tell me, what happened to this guy? Suzie
 
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pds857 is offline pds857 Post #3  July 22,2009, 7:37am
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I cant Stand a Cheap Guy!

Frugal is one thing, but being tighter than Bark on a tree?!
No way. If ya'll end up gettin serious in the future an he desides to
try to control your spending habbits, or charge you intrest on any money he pays out for you, then dang, whatcha gonna do?

I save and spend my money in equal amounts for the most part, if there is somethin that I Really wanna do I can save up the money for it like No body's business. But I also like to enjoy myself with what I have.

My advice is to stop seeing him, drop his stuff on the curb an roll on away from this fella, he most likely will bring you nothin but frustrations.
 
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ngawildflower is offline ngawildflower Post #4  July 22,2009, 8:11am
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1Horselady wrote :
I hope you can handle a response from another woman. WOW!! I hope you dropped this guy like the HOT POTATO he was! Although he might help you SAVE money, I don't think he would ever be someone's DREAM DATE(NIGHTMARE is more like it). So, tell me, what happened to this guy? Suzie
Suzie, Yes, responses from women are most welcome too! Just wondered if other men would consider charging their wives interest as I would have never even conceived of charging my husband interest! Anyway, as of right now we are still together as I just got this information the last time I saw him several days ago and have been "mulling" this over ever since. Thanx! Jenny

I hope you can handle a response from another woman. WOW!! I hope you dropped this guy like the HOT POTATO he was! Although he might help you SAVE money, I don't think he would ever be someone's DREAM DATE(NIGHTMARE is more like it). So, tell me, what happened to this guy? Suzie
 
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ngawildflower is offline ngawildflower Post #5  July 22,2009, 8:23am
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pds857 wrote :
I cant Stand a Cheap Guy!

Frugal is one thing, but being tighter than Bark on a tree?!
No way. If ya'll end up gettin serious in the future an he desides to
try to control your spending habbits, or charge you intrest on any money he pays out for you, then dang, whatcha gonna do?

I save and spend my money in equal amounts for the most part, if there is somethin that I Really wanna do I can save up the money for it like No body's business. But I also like to enjoy myself with what I have.

My advice is to stop seeing him, drop his stuff on the curb an roll on away from this fella, he most likely will bring you nothin but frustrations.
Thanks for your statement "he will most likely bring you nothing but frustrations". That's like confirmation to my gut feelings. I've worked hard to get to a place of financial independence (meaning I don't need someone else to support me). I don't have abundance but I get by and the one thing I've said is I don't want someone to dictate or criticize how I spend every cent - I earn it. I pay my bills, I have excellent credit but like you I hate totally cheap! It's funny that I put the "can't stand...cheap" in my top 10 list and it didn't deter him. Clearly he does not see himself that way.
 
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1Horselady is offline 1Horselady Post #6  July 23,2009, 9:09pm
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Of course, he'd see himself that way. He thinks he's being very frugal with his money- not cheap. Has he ever been married? Because it will kill him to find out he would have to share. Suzie
 
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