Why Do You Go To Church?

Hey!

Your examples sound very antiquated...a lot has changed in the last few years.

It's not all about what I get out of church or what the church can do for me. If it was, I wouldn't go because the motivation to be there would be both entirely selfish and desperately unfulfilling.

We have all been given gifts and talents that we are to use. Speaking only for myself, I like to be involved in the life the church. I like to use the gifts and talents I have been given to honour God and to help others. I know that I am a good teacher and I taught Sunday School to various age groups for many years. I am also very good with children and have worked in numerous church nurseries, caring for very young children so their parents could participate in the service. I have served on the board of a women's outreach group at the church I attended in Regina. I have participated in leading worship during Sunday services as part of varioous worship teams. I have helped out with youth programs and have sung in choirs. I have set up and taken down chairs for special events and I have helped in the kitchen at church fellowship dinners numerous times.

It's not all about me and how I'm being served, but how I serve others. Do I always get something out of the sermon? No, not always. Is the music always great and uplifting? No, not every single time. Are all the people nice all the time? No, but then neither am I. Do I like everyone I go to church with? Honestly, no. There have been some who have made me rather insane. I do not consider any of those things reason enough to leave, though. If no one stays and works to improve the church from the inside, what will be left? Who will reach out to those who may be venturing in for the first time? Who will be there to comfort or provide a listening ear to those who are hurting or in need? Who will put their shoulder to the wheel and work to change things? Who will get down on their knees and pray for the church?

My experiences with church have not always been great. The first pastor I had was not the world's greatest preacher and I knew that from probably about nine years old. He was, however, one of the greatest pastors I ever knew. He cared about people, no matter who they were and no matter whether or not they ever darkened the door of the church. He took time out of his day to help people with home renovations or whatever else they needed. He dropped everything at any hour for those in need. I know him still and he is the same as he was then. His chief concern is the well-being of people, no matter who they are or where they have come from.

The second pastor we had at that church was not so great. He was abusive to my mom, cruel to the other members of my family, and caused no end of problems in the church. Still, my family and I continued going there. We had built relationships with the people in that church over many years and had committed ourselves to serving there, no matter what the cost - and the cost was high sometimes. We were not served or nourished in any way while that pastor was there. It was like being in a desert, but no one ever said being a Christian, or being around other Christians, was easy or always pleasant. Christians are human too and we fail often.

My experiences with church in the last five or so years have been beyond anything I ever expected. When I was still in Regina, I became part of a real church family. My own family was halfway across the country from me and I rarely got to see them, sometimes not for a year or two. The people at my church took me in and made me their daughter, granddaughter, sister, and friend. When I found myself living only on the meager amount I received from student loans and in need of a home, a family from the church took me in. When I found myself without money for food, the church helped me out. When I had nowhere to go for holidays like Christmas and sometimes Easter and Thanksgiving, people from the church included me in their family gatherings. My pastor and his wife always took me with them to their family Christmas Eve celebration. When my now ex-fiance and I broke up, the members of my church rallied around me and supported me.

Throughout my years at that church, I always sat with a group of widows, who adopted me as their own. There were people there who always made a point of finding me, or I would find them on Sunday mornings, just to get a hug and to say, "How are you? What is going on in your world?" When I graduated with my undergraduate degree, these people rejoiced with me. I rejoiced with them over good things in their lives and mourned with them as they grieved. I came to expect excellent sermons from my pastor and he rarely disappointed. He was and is rooted in the Word and never shied away from admitting his own areas of struggle. He never elevated himself above his congregation, but walked with us, learned with us, and grappled with the sometimes harsh realities of life, especially the Christian life, with us. I also never ceased to appreciate the elders in our church - the members of the Board. These men of faith were an amazing example to me. They walked with God for decades and could tell numerous stories of God's grace in their lives and in the life of the church.

When I first started attending there, I was the only person my age in the church. There were a few youngish families, but the congregation was predominantly seniors. It was these people who took me in and made me one of their own. I could have left. I could have found a younger, hipper church or not gone to church at all, but I stayed. I stayed and got involved. I stayed and forged friendships that I never found anywhere else. I gained wisdom from these wonderful people and also seemed to add something to their lives. My last Sunday there before I moved to Ottawa, we all had tears in our eyes. After so much time spent growing together and building into each others' lives, it was hard, even painful, to say goodbye. The journey was not without its difficulties and disappointments and the relationships did not always progress smoothly, but bonds were developed that went far beyond any other friendship I had while in Regina. The people in that church were my family. I still regard them as such. I don't always get along with my actual family and I don't always get along with my church family either, but going to church and building into the lives of the people there is something I will never, ever give up. There is too much to be given and gained there. The times of joy and refreshing are worth the occasional desert or season pain.

In the end, I discovered Christ in the church. He has made Himself known to me through the people in the churches I have attended and I can only hope that He has and will continue to reveal himself to others in and outside the church through me.

It's not all about what I get out of church or what the church can do for me. If it was, I wouldn't go because the motivation to be there would be both entirely selfish and desperately unfulfilling.


It's not all about me and how I'm being served, but how I serve others.

Who will get down on their knees and pray for the church?

In the end, I discovered Christ in the church. He has made Himself known to me through the people in the churches I have attended and I can only hope that He has and will continue to reveal himself to others in and outside the church through me.

abjon - in the Churches I have attended in several cities (Canada and the US)
none have been like that you describe. Maybe you ran into some Churches
that focus on sin and not The Cross. Maybe those same places might be different today than they were many years ago. Have you been back to any Churches recently (chosen for yourself, not by a girlfriend) ? Have you tried a few Sundays in a row in one place ? Hope you find a Church you like.

Personally, I believe going to church is not essentially necessary for spiritual growth. Spiritual growth is very personal, and normally takes place through the discipline of private study and contemplation. But, what church should provide, is a sense of community. And ideally, it should be a sort of "hospital for sinners," since we all foul-up and make mistakes, and not a place where self-righteous people play the game of spiritual one-up-manship. And I believe that is what Christ intended, since he offered mercy and grace to those who stumbled, but reserved his harshest judgment for those who hypocritically passed judgment on others.

Hey, yourself!

Your church sounds wonderful and I like the idea that you are encouraged to comment on the sermons over the Net. I have to say though that if I attended a church early in the morning overlooking a beach I would be very, very tempted to get outside and commune with God in nature.

I gather you must go to a very big church if it can have services at different times of the day on Sunday. I think this is good, too. I never could figure out why service at 11 a.m. was somehow seen as a more holy hour than some other hour.

Thank you for sharing your church experience with all of us.