Sexual Acts vs. Sex- same sin?

This opinion question is really on behalf of my best friend. She is of the opinion that there is absolutely nothing wrong with engaging in sexual acts before marriage, as long as it stops short of sexual intercourse. Now, it seems obvious to me that this opinion is completely erroneous and goes against everything the bible has to say on the topic....but all of her close christian friends feel the same way, and I've found it virtually impossible to change her mind about this. The most I've ever gotten her to recognize is that it is still a sin, but her justification is that it's like comparing a small lie to murder- so she thinks it's kind of wrong, but not as wrong as this huge thing which is sex.

I feel like it's equally wrong, and that it's not so much an opinion question but rather biblical fact. But, I'm willing to accept that I could be missing something or in the minority opinion on this, so please, any input on this topic would be greatly appreciated!

PS- ironically, she's really frustrated with her dating life because she can't seem to find men who won't push for sex. In her mind, if they push for it then that's all they care about. My opinion is that if she's going to rush into everything but sex sometimes within 3 dates, it's going to be almost impossible for her to find the kind of guy she's looking for- she's sending all the wrong signals from the very beginning. But please, if I'm crazy and missing something, please tell me.

MC, you are so right on there! Sometimes, analogies like you used ties into other thoughts with me so I am hoping you or others can somewhat follow my train of thought here.

We are so tied together, body and emotions .... and I would also add spirit. The big one for me is how many men and women feel that our faith should be left outside of the "bedroom door" so to speak. Can you imagine what it would be like to truly know the Song of Solomon type of truly appreciating everything about your partner? Of feeling so truly appreciated. I don't, but I want to know that the next relationship I am in allows that wonderful excelleration of allowing God to be a part of the wonder of what we share together.

As such, I can't answer your poll because it concentrates on the issue of sin instead of on the issue of the best God would want in my life or the life of others. The "sticky tape" parable, on the other hand" concentrates on the reality that each time I, or any other person, goes into a place that is so intimately attached to our souls, we need to be able to go there without having to separate ourselves from the one who loves us beyond all others, the one who does not want us to drink from the broken cisterns but instead offers us living water, who wants to give us wholeness. I think that is worth waiting for.

MC, you are so right on there! Sometimes, analogies like you used ties into other thoughts with me so I am hoping you or others can somewhat follow my train of thought here.

We are so tied together, body and emotions .... and I would also add spirit. The big one for me is how many men and women feel that our faith should be left outside of the "bedroom door" so to speak. Can you imagine what it would be like to truly know the Song of Solomon type of truly appreciating everything about your partner? Of feeling so truly appreciated. I don't, but I want to know that the next relationship I am in allows that wonderful excelleration of allowing God to be a part of the wonder of what we share together.

As such, I can't answer your poll because it concentrates on the issue of sin instead of on the issue of the best God would want in my life or the life of others. The "sticky tape" parable, on the other hand" concentrates on the reality that each time I, or any other person, goes into a place that is so intimately attached to our souls, we need to be able to go there without having to separate ourselves from the one who loves us beyond all others, the one who does not want us to drink from the broken cisterns but instead offers us living water, who wants to give us wholeness. I think that is worth waiting for.