JasonX43 is offline JasonX43 Post #1  September 25,2008, 2:39am
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I need to shake some excees baggage. When I let my imagination wander I find myself replaying things that happened between my roommate and his ex-wife, but I imagine how I would've handled things when she said she was moving out(screaming, shouting, and acting bad!) Can anyone give me advice on how to shake this off because I'm in the process of writing music and I don't want their break up to inch it's way into my music.
 
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j2 is offline j2 Post #2  September 25,2008, 2:36pm
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i can't help you, i still have scars from someone elses divorce, largely because i understand how it could happen, can even see myself doing pretty much the same thing as he did, yet in the end there was nothing he could have done to save it. he was doomed the moment he said i do. worse i get to see the legacy of that relationship poisoned by her.

even if i could help you though, i don't know as i nessesaraly would. a time or two a song has hit me when i needed it, and i can't say as no one would ever need you to wright a song entitled 'she threw my heart away, but God still cares' (you see why i don't wright lyrics?) i don't know you and i don't know how you work, but after you've prayed about it. for the lords will and blessing in your music, you might want to wright a song about it. when your done decide if its worth publishing, handing out to people you think might want to read it, or just keeping it to yourself. then if you still feel it poisoning your work, try writing a song about giving your problems to Jesus. these might help but then they might not.
 
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angeniece is offline angeniece Post #3  September 25,2008, 3:23pm
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Jason, you have to pray. In all of my relationships (both platonic and romantic) I am the person people come to for advice. I am extremely empathetic and it got to the point when I thought I was going crazy. I was left burdened by everyones problems, I could feel everyones pain. I couldnt concentrate or sleep at night, I would just FEEL and worry about others. Eventually I just had to pray and turn it over to the Lord. I then instructed my friends to do the same. We are not built to handle other peoples burdens, we cant even carry our own.
 
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brdking is offline brdking Post #4  September 25,2008, 4:41pm
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Hi Jason, why don't you let yourself write about it - it may not be your next hit, but it will get it ourside of you. Then you can put it aside and get back in touch with yourself.


Angeniece - doesn't Jesus tell us to carry one another's burdens?


I think there's a difference between doing that, and being totally taken over by it. I've learned a lot about containment this year - trying to contain what others tell me, but not take that into myself, leave it with them, having walked alongside and carried it with them for a bit. It takes practice - prayer, reflection - sometimes some training. I find that I need to stay really grounded while I'm listening to someone - sometimes I need to walk or dance after I am with them, so I get back to who I am, and separate out what I feel in empathetic reflection from what is me.
 
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angeniece is offline angeniece Post #5  September 25,2008, 6:30pm
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brdking,272075 wrote :

Hi Jason, why don't you let yourself write about it - it may not be your next hit, but it will get it ourside of you. Then you can put it aside and get back in touch with yourself.


Angeniece - doesn't Jesus tell us to carry one another's burdens?


I think there's a difference between doing that, and being totally taken over by it. I've learned a lot about containment this year - trying to contain what others tell me, but not take that into myself, leave it with them, having walked alongside and carried it with them for a bit. It takes practice - prayer, reflection - sometimes some training. I find that I need to stay really grounded while I'm listening to someone - sometimes I need to walk or dance after I am with them, so I get back to who I am, and separate out what I feel in empathetic reflection from what is me.

Yes, I think in Galations, but sometimes it can take you over and you have to turn it over.
 
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jeanie7 is offline jeanie7 Post #6  September 25,2008, 8:38pm
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angeniece,272223 wrote :

brdking,272075 wrote :


Hi Jason, why don't you let yourself write about it - it may not be your next hit, but it will get it ourside of you. Then you can put it aside and get back in touch with yourself.


Angeniece - doesn't Jesus tell us to carry one another's burdens?


I think there's a difference between doing that, and being totally taken over by it. I've learned a lot about containment this year - trying to contain what others tell me, but not take that into myself, leave it with them, having walked alongside and carried it with them for a bit. It takes practice - prayer, reflection - sometimes some training. I find that I need to stay really grounded while I'm listening to someone - sometimes I need to walk or dance after I am with them, so I get back to who I am, and separate out what I feel in empathetic reflection from what is me.





Yes, I think in Galations, but sometimes it can take you over and you have to turn it over.



Regarding carrying other's burdens, Galatians 6:2 says to bear ye one another's burdens. The word “bear” in the original Greek, means to carry away. How do you carry it away? You minister the word of God to that person concerning the matter, add your faith to theirs, and commit to stand with them until the answer comes, you then, together, cast the care of it over on the Lord I Peter 5:7. In the mean time you both go on with your life in Christ, and continue in prayer and watch in the same with thanksgiving, Colossians 4:2. You stand and believe together. Not forgetting, but keeping your faith on it daily with that person until manifestation. It's not a grievous thing. It's an exciting thing. This is how the burden goes from feeling heavy, and grievous to being a faith challenge which is exciting.


Jason I hope this helps you.


Blessings


jeanie7
 
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JasonX43 is offline JasonX43 Post #7  September 25,2008, 11:43pm
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It gets tiring when you're the only Christian in the house. His ex-wife thinks she's one, but she believes that Jesus was just a man and she's only read the Bible once. Everything else she gets from tv specials. [img]library/editor/plugins/emotions/img/smiley-undecided.gif[/img] Plus she left because her husband disapproved of her going out and getting drunk and he wasn't into sports. [img]library/editor/plugins/emotions/img/smiley-undecided.gif[/img]





The only thing that bugs me is that I'm willing to bet that if she came walking through the door, begging him to take her back, I know he would. I know the Bible says we are to forgive and forget, but how do you trust someone that's willing to leave you at the drop of a hat? My instincts also tell me that she started seeing the guy she's currently dating before she even moved out!
 
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Looking_for_the_love_of_my_lif is offline Looking_for_the_love_of_my_lif Post #8  September 26,2008, 7:00am
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I met a great guy at the singles group at church. I am very attracted to him and he is quite obviously with me. He even told me he was. I met him this July and his divorce was final March 2008. The problem is he has never asked me for my phone number and has not attempted to see me anywhere else than the singles class at church. What gives?
 
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jeanie7 is offline jeanie7 Post #9  September 26,2008, 7:08am
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JasonX43, wrote :

I need to shake some excees baggage. When I let my imagination wander I find myself replaying things that happened between my roommate and his ex-wife, but I imagine how I would've handled things when she said she was moving out(screaming, shouting, and acting bad!) Can anyone give me advice on how to shake this off because I'm in the process of writing music and I don't want their break up to inch it's way into my music.
Just wanted to share another thought: Carrying someone's burden is not the same as carrying the care of someone's burden. The word tells us to carry the burden not the care of it.
 
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JasonX43 is offline JasonX43 Post #10  September 27,2008, 1:32am
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Looking_for_the_love_of_my_lif,272665 wrote :

I met a great guy at the singles group at church. I am very attracted to him and he is quite obviously with me. He even told me he was. I met him this July and his divorce was final March 2008. The problem is he has never asked me for my phone number and has not attempted to see me anywhere else than the singles class at church. What gives?
To be honest, if he still loves her, he's probably having a hard time coping with the fact that she left him. My roommate is having such a hard time that he's honestly talked about renting out his room because he's slept on the couch ever since she moved out!
 
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