femenergy is offline femenergy Post #1  September 20,2010, 6:16am
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Hardly! I think men need to pick up their game with women in their 40s. I am 40 and I am approached by men in their late 20s and 30s all the time. I get along better with them in some ways because men my age treat me like I'm desperate or something. Honestly, 40+ men, your dating pool is open, but so is ours. If I'm going to get together with a man just for sex it's going to be a younger man. 40+ women still got it!
 
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sfnurse is offline sfnurse Post #2  September 20,2010, 8:11pm
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LOL - that's great! You know what - as a 45 y.o. woman, I feel better about my self as a person than I ever have before. I don't NEED a man, like I thought I did in my 20s or 30s but it would be nice to know one. If it doesn't happen, that's okay too because I have a good life with great people in it. It's about being content with yourself first and then having that room in your life for someone else.
Desperation?? Nah - this is the time to start really enjoying yourself as a woman.
 
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AudioDad is offline AudioDad Post #3  September 21,2010, 8:08pm
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femenergy wrote :
I am 40 and I am approached by men in their late 20s and 30s all the time. I get along better with them in some ways because men my age that I've personally met treat me like I'm desperate or something.
There, fixed it for you.

So you've met a few luddites your age who treat you like you're desperate and that automatically translates to the rest of the 40-something male population? Hard as this may be to believe, a lot of us guys wouldn't treat you like that and, like you, prefer to be treated as individuals....not gender stereotypes.

My girlfriend loves to say how she doesn't need a man around for anything. She's well educated, extremely independent, driven, successful and intelligent. And yet, oddly enough, I'm the first one she calls when something breaks around her house or when she's tired of eating pre-fab food (I'm the cook in the relationship). I shrug...I nod...and I smile. I love her anyway and would go to the ends of the world for her. Go figure.

I don't think men need to pick up there game at all. I think all of us need to lose the silly 'tude that we're Uber Woman/Man. Being comfortable in one's own skin is great and definitely one of the benefits of this time in life. But wearing your middle age singleness like some red badge of courage and loudly proclaiming "I am Woman/Man, hear me roar!!" is really outdated and, well, kinda silly. Especially when it's being posted on an online dating website's forum.
 
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Pilgrim007 is offline Pilgrim007 Post #4  October 10,2010, 6:54am
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AudioDad wrote :
There, fixed it for you.

So you've met a few luddites your age who treat you like you're desperate and that automatically translates to the rest of the 40-something male population? Hard as this may be to believe, a lot of us guys wouldn't treat you like that and, like you, prefer to be treated as individuals....not gender stereotypes.

My girlfriend loves to say how she doesn't need a man around for anything. She's well educated, extremely independent, driven, successful and intelligent. And yet, oddly enough, I'm the first one she calls when something breaks around her house or when she's tired of eating pre-fab food (I'm the cook in the relationship). I shrug...I nod...and I smile. I love her anyway and would go to the ends of the world for her. Go figure.

I don't think men need to pick up there game at all. I think all of us need to lose the silly 'tude that we're Uber Woman/Man. Being comfortable in one's own skin is great and definitely one of the benefits of this time in life. But wearing your middle age singleness like some red badge of courage and loudly proclaiming "I am Woman/Man, hear me roar!!" is really outdated and, well, kinda silly. Especially when it's being posted on an online dating website's forum.
So true!

Young children (3, 4, or 5) don’t worry about all this adult c%@p. They just go out and have fun.

Why wouldn't a younger mant want to be with a 40ish woman he finds attractive.

Just as some younger women are attracted to older men for the qualities they find attractive. The only time in my 40s I was hit on by a 19 year old it was VERY embarrassing . At that time in her life I had something she was looking for but I KNOW it would never have lasted and that is what I am looking for.

Femenergy, Good luck with your search and I hope you start running into more enlightened men…

IMHO
 
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NoCommonWench is offline NoCommonWench Post #5  November 9,2010, 3:46pm
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Definitely not! My "biological clock" is no longer an issue. Also, like sfnurse, I would say that my self-esteem is much better than it was in my 20's and 30's. And I have a better idea of what I want and don't want in a man. I get lonely sometimes but I am not willing to "settle" or put up with a man who treats me ambiguously just so I can have a warm body beside me at night.
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dayglo is offline dayglo Post #6  November 13,2010, 6:18am
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I'm 48 but have been told i look much younger and I certainly feel younger. I get approached by men my age or older and almost always feel like I'm being hit on by my dad. Dating younger men makes me feel "old", what to do...?
 
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richey is offline richey Post #7  November 17,2010, 2:17pm
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Desperate? no. IN THEIR PRIME and horny and at their sexiest? YES!!!!!
My most fun times have been with late 30/early 40's females.

(I am now 42).

Richey
 
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Apple123 is offline Apple123 Post #8  November 26,2010, 5:44pm
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Thanks for that comment Richey! I am 48 and single and i do get lonely at times, but i don't consider myself desperate...at my age i now know what i'm looking for in a man and a relationship. I also know now how to compromise and not "me", "me" all the time. Give and take is still one of the best rules out there...to achieve a successful relationship.
 
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libertygirl is offline libertygirl Post #9  January 11,2012, 12:53pm
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If men think women in their 40's are desperate and women in their 50's are over the hill...they are in for a big surprise. I have met several women in their 40's and 50's who are absoulutely great...sexy...beautiful...educated...and their own person. Many successful women have all the confidence in the world, great looks, great bodies, educated, and powerful. But, they often find that men in their 40's, 50's and especially early 60's are looking for much younger 25 to 39 year old women. If you see they have included generous, wanting to travel, make you the center of their life statements be cautious. I went out with a 61 year old...fit and successful but recently retired. He told me as we were rocketing across a lake in his go-fast boat that he was a 12 year old boy in a 60 year old body. Just what I was looking for...another Peter Pan. LOL. Later he confesses he has dated two women... a woman in her 50s who he thinks is the nicest..the greatest...but he has had a sexual relationship with a woman in her 30s who is tiny and the greatest fake boobs. He says if he can only put their qualities together he would have the perfect woman...after he has dated the woman in her 50s for 4 years that adores him. There was nothing wrong with the woman in her 50s...but the other woman was younger and the newest toy for him. I hate to say it but many men in their 50's and 60'sa and even 40's are very vain...still think they are 30. Isn't it interesting that the same guys who tried to seduce us in H.S. and college and later....now look at a picture of themselves and see themselves still 30 something....vibrant, potent, good looking, no paunch, no receding hairline. Yet, after awhile they discover they need someone to have lunch/coffee with who knows things from their own era. They drink more, isolate themselves or serial date young women which ends with them poorer and shocked it didn't work out. Isn't it refeshing to find anyone of any age who is comfortable in their own body...with themselves. Guess what...those are the people we all want to meet at any age. Be yourself...keep active and fit. When men of all ages look at you admiringly...just smile back and have a great day.
 
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