gigi92201 is offline gigi92201 Post #1  May 22,2009, 6:33pm
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Okay, I'm asking the big question. How do you get someone to respond? Are the men my age (64) after younger women? (And 64 is not THAT old.!)
Another thing. How come the men's profiles are so short? I know women use maybe 3x as many words a day as men, but does that scare them off? What???? I"m getting frustrated and irritated and confused and ready to quit, but I accidently paid for another 3 months so here I am!
Oh well, not my best day, I guess. Any and all comments would be welcome. At least someone would be writing to me!
Gigi
 
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chapgirl is offline chapgirl Post #2  May 22,2009, 8:18pm
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Gigi,

I have not had a lot of luck either, and have been a member on two different occasions. I am 52. And according to a couple of the other threads, it seems the women are especially frustrated. In my experience, the 29 dimensions, miss the mark. They don't hit the big ticket items. Eg. I keep getting matched to guys who are a lot more conservative than I am, so while we may be in the right age group, or goals, the values may cause great consternation! I am also a woman pastor, which a lot of Christian men don't believe should be, or they are somehow intimidated by that. So, I don't hear. But all I need is one! So I will wait.

Hang in there!
 
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JerseyLilly is offline JerseyLilly Post #3  May 23,2009, 3:35am
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gigi92201 wrote :
Okay, I'm asking the big question. How do you get someone to respond? Are the men my age (64) after younger women?
IMO, Yes, once men are over 50 they usually (and I will stand by this) begin looking for women 10 to 20+ years younger than themselves. I'm not sure exactly why this is; a sexual ego thing, or perhaps looking for someone to care for them in their older years? Either way, it makes it nearly impossible for women in their 50s and 60s to attract men of their own age group.

I'm 56, in good physical shape, not ugly, fairly intelligent, even tempered etc. It simply doesn't matter. I said in another thread, women of my age would be better served to volunteer at a local nursing home...that's the age group of men that are interested in us! Sadly, I'm not kidding.
 
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JaneJane is offline JaneJane Post #4  May 23,2009, 2:50pm
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Yes, I agree guys our age will only date younger women. Not just guys from 50 but from 40 on they just want to date ladies from 20 to 35. It is funny to watch though because the second that guys stop spending money on these women - off they go. These are women who are looking for someone to take care of them. I personally am looking for an equal partner. One reason I do not care to date someone over age 60 is because I do not want to be nurse maid. Dating younger is better for me, but has its drawbacks too as I've already raised two kids. So here I am single for 15 years now; I gave up on one personal ad site because the responses were from all older guys - guys my age or slightly younger just didn't respond.
 
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artsylady is offline artsylady Post #5  May 23,2009, 3:28pm
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I have to admit that I have not responded to some matches I've received. I start thinking about having to get to know someone (again) to see if it could be a true match, and I'm just not sure I'm ready to try again. Or, I feel they look way overweight, or there's something they've written that I'm just not in agreement with. So I guess I have to expect the same now and then. I tried this two years ago and didn't have a good experience, after meeting someone, and I'm really doing this with a lot of caution.
 
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faesome is offline faesome Post #6  May 25,2009, 5:15am
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Hi, patience my dear....gotta have faith..it will work out..trust me.

There is someone out-there for you..

cheers
 
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kchockey17 is offline kchockey17 Post #7  May 25,2009, 12:33pm
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It is funny you posted this as I am a man with the same question. In reading some of the other posts I would disagree about the younger woman statement. In my case (I still have visitation with 2 of my 5 children) most women my age take a pass because in the begining I am only available every other weekend as I don't like to introduce someone until I am very comfortable in the relationship. The women my age want someone whose children are grown and they are available every weekend therefore I seem to have a target zone of mid 40's. I also travel for work almost every week for at least 2-3 days and that seems to be a drawback too.
You may want to review your profile and add the feeling of being flexible about issues and age dilemas and see what that does. Feel free to offer me any tips you have about me. Hope this at least makes you feel better!! Keep the faith! KC
 
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smithgreenapple is offline smithgreenapple Post #8  May 25,2009, 5:47pm
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I am 46 years young and have to agree the majority of men in my age bracket want the younger models. I reside in South Florida so let us add that because I do not have silicone or botox I do not get a second look. I know what I have to offer but in this area the men seems to want no one with a brain, a career, or stablity. They (men) seem to want the brand new '09 ferrari rather than the '74 corvette even though they (men) have no idea how to drive the ferrari!! Been told I look younger than my actual age and I keep up with my younger co-managers (all in their early 30's).
Came back to eharmony to give it another try and now feel I should have just burned my money or went shopping for myself! Ha Ha
 
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JerseyLilly is offline JerseyLilly Post #9  May 25,2009, 6:13pm
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Well, I knew something was up when some men were closing the match without even bothering to read my profile! Now, I'm a big supporter of closing any matches that you just know aren't going to work, but closing a match without even bothering to look at it!
And, no, in these instances there were no anonymous profile views listed.
 
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CastleLady is offline CastleLady Post #10  May 31,2009, 12:01am
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I get a number of matches, but I really have to question EH's definition of "compatibility". Most of the men with whom I'm "matched" seem to have very little in common with me, and I'm beginning to suspect that most of the men in my age bracket are looking either for younger trophy-women (if they're healthy) or for care-givers (if they aren't). That makes me wonder if women looking for an equal partnership might not be at a disadvantage here.

I've been told (by men who don't have photos of themselves posted as avatars, mind you) that I need a "better picture", and maybe that's the case. On the other hand, I can still run circles around a lot of women half my age, am continuing to learn, and love life. I don't want a boy, but I don't want a mental or physical geriatric either. There have to be some men out there who really want an equal relationship, but I'm not seeing them on EH.
 
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