zurbrj1 is offline zurbrj1 Post #1  October 18,2009, 2:21pm
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I keep reading and hearing about chemistry. It appears that chemistry is the "magical" bullet that almost everyone is looking for on EH. If that's that the case, why not register at Chemistry.com?...just kidding.

So can someonw tell me what chemistry is? How do you know if you have it? How long does it last? Is Chemisrty mutual? Is chemistry all or none? Can you work to achieve chemisrty? Can you have too little or too much chemistry?

I think a very small portion of relationsips achieved through "chemistry" are lasting but i'm not a marriage counselor or social scientist. How many times have you heard someone say that so and so has perfect chemistry only to find out they either broke up or got divorced? I see and hear this all the time and therefore I think the notion of "chemistry" is over rated!

I can say that my first real relationship was "chemisrty" but now in hindsight what I believed was chemisrty was just over sexed attraction. Ones attraction to ones's physical appearance can cloud the overall health of a relationship. I had to learn this the hard way and it was not fun!

Learning from my past, I now subscribe to the theory of Equity. Yes I do agree that a small amount of "chemistry" must or should exists in order for a realationship to sprout. Once it has sprouted, I think both parties need to evaluate what which other brings into the relationship. These equities can consists knowledge, skills, abilities, personalities, and I have to say it, money and social upbringing /status. These equities need to be as even as possible. Also one's defiency in one equity can be offset by positive equities in other areas. For examples, he or she many not bring money into the relationship, but he or she takes care of the house or brings a special skill into the relationship.

Was just bored and just wanted to blog......
 
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2perfection is offline 2perfection Post #2  October 25,2009, 1:28am
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I think chemistry is physical attraction plus being able to "get" the person. If you have both, you probably have good chemistry! :-)
 
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