Closed for age difference - we were the same age!


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jona816 is offline jona816 Post #1  August 27,2008, 8:12pm
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I am a female and noticed that EH puts my matches up to 14 years older, but they only go a few years younger than me. What are the auto parameters for men? I was recently closed by a match who initiated communication with me. We exchanged MHCS and they were pretty consistant with each other's. He closed me stating "The difference in our age is too great". We were the exact same age!! What gives? Wish EH had open opportunities for messages sent back when you are closed
 
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MoneyHoney is offline MoneyHoney Post #2  August 28,2008, 1:35pm
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I went to the "settings" section of my profile, and under the "Age" section is says that eH's default age setting for a women my age is to match me with men that are 4 years younger and up to 16 years older.





I wonder what the default setting is for men.





I don't want to date a guy that is 16 years younger than me, but it sure would be nice to have interest on eH from men that are around my age.





When we get around to talking about it in RL, people always think that I am much younger than I am. {It makes me think about that thread where the man wrote, "Ladies, don't say you look 1o years younger, because you don't! Hee, hee!) I am full of energy, love going to wine bars, rock concerts and music festivals, and certainly don't want to helpa manbabysit his grandchildren. At the point where I am in my life, I have very little in common with a man that is 16 years older than me.
 
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killbill is offline killbill Post #3  August 28,2008, 3:28pm
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jona816, wrote :

I am a female and noticed that EH puts my matches up to 14 years older, but they only go a few years younger than me. What are the auto parameters for men? I was recently closed by a match who initiated communication with me. We exchanged MHCS and they were pretty consistant with each other's. He closed me stating "The difference in our age is too great". We were the exact same age!! What gives? Wish EH had open opportunities for messages sent back when you are closed
Arr.. He's just not that into you
 
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comedicdad is offline comedicdad Post #4  August 29,2008, 12:45am
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I believe my recommendations are 10 years younger and 3 years older. Personally, I'm very careful with 10 years younger, as I'm done reproducing or otherwise restaring a family, and, even for those who *think* they don't want to have children, a 33 year old female is still very prone to hearing that biological clock ticking in a few years and thinking "well, maybe I'm missing something....". Not saying I wouldn't date someone that young (or even a tad younger if they are mature enough), but I get very careful about their outlook on additional children.
 
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Notorious is offline Notorious Post #5  August 29,2008, 7:39am
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Maybe he's looking for a cougar and you're too young or a young'n and you're too old.


No info in your profile to offer anything else.
 
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Nelia is offline Nelia Post #6  February 1,2009, 11:52pm
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MoneyHoney,236493 wrote :

I went to the "settings" section of my profile, and under the "Age" section is says that eH's default age setting for a women my age is to match me with men that are 4 years younger and up to 16 years older.





I wonder what the default setting is for men.





I don't want to date a guy that is 16 years younger than me, but it sure would be nice to have interest on eH from men that are around my age.





When we get around to talking about it in RL, people always think that I am much younger than I am. {It makes me think about that thread where the man wrote, "Ladies, don't say you look 1o years younger, because you don't! Hee, hee!) I am full of energy, love going to wine bars, rock concerts and music festivals, and certainly don't want to helpa manbabysit his grandchildren. At the point where I am in my life, I have very little in common with a man that is 16 years older than me.
I wonder the same thing: What is the default age range for men? Probably just the opposite, -16 to +4! I changed my age settings because I would really prefer someone close to my age or younger. I don't want to lie about my age, but I wonder if I should? People are surprised when I tell them my age because they think I am much younger. Even my doctor says my body is young for my age and I still have younger children at home. So are some men missing out because they continue to use the default settings?
 
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Coca-Cola is offline Coca-Cola Post #7  February 2,2009, 5:12am
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Nelia, wrote :
I don't want to lie about my age, but I wonder if I should?
I completely recommend this! What a fantastic idea! Lying is the best way to get a relationship off on a great start, Nelia.


jona816, wrote :
What are the auto parameters for men?
The default age range formula for men and for women is provided in eHarmony Newsletter Vol. 22. Google it, and then thank me afterwards, okay?


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Jon3050 is offline Jon3050 Post #8  February 2,2009, 10:13am
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jona816, wrote :

I am a female and noticed that EH puts my matches up to 14 years older, but they only go a few years younger than me. What are the auto parameters for men? I was recently closed by a match who initiated communication with me. We exchanged MHCS and they were pretty consistant with each other's. He closed me stating "The difference in our age is too great". We were the exact same age!! What gives? Wish EH had open opportunities for messages sent back when you are closed
He probably just blindly chose a reason and didn't bother to read what it was. Or like someone else said, he's looking for a much younger (or possibly older) woman. You can send a final reply but you can't write a custom one unfortunately. EH should change it imo to allow you to at least write a custom reason for closing out a match since the ones they give don't always fit the reason and "Other" is just too vague.
 
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robv_la is offline robv_la Post #9  February 2,2009, 10:23am
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Some guys only want to date a women younger than them. This becomes more common as people get into their 30's and 40's.
 
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PY is offline PY Post #10  February 2,2009, 12:00pm

Sometimes...just be a bigger person and take the high road.

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jona816, wrote :

I am a female and noticed that EH puts my matches up to 14 years older, but they only go a few years younger than me. What are the auto parameters for men? I was recently closed by a match who initiated communication with me. We exchanged MHCS and they were pretty consistant with each other's. He closed me stating "The difference in our age is too great". We were the exact same age!! What gives? Wish EH had open opportunities for messages sent back when you are closed
LOL would you really like to date anybody who's mathematically challenged? What? 29 (not equal) 29?


I'd say you've lostnothing.
 
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