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dkwl dkwl is offline
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i really appreciated this info since i didn't know about the non paying members. i have been a member for 2 weeks and i have not had one guy communicate with me first. a few have responded to me but then it will be a long time before they communicate again. i thought the goal was to find someone and they sure don't seem to be trying!!!!!!!!!
- August 26th, 2009, 05:38 pm
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newtwo newtwo is offline
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I'm new too. What's this about members that don't pay? How are we supposed to know that? I've been communicating with no responses and taking it as a rejection. I've initiated 6 times with one response. My pic is nice, my profile seems to be in order. What's the deal? And how to you call someone in Eharmony to find out if their paying or not? I'm about ready to give up.
- September 8th, 2009, 06:19 pm
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MicMan MicMan is offline
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newtwo wrote :
I'm new too. What's this about members that don't pay? How are we supposed to know that?
There is no way to officially know. Often, you can tell non-payers by the lack of a completed profile and the lack of a picture, but that is not always the case.


newtwo wrote :
I've been communicating with no responses and taking it as a rejection. I've initiated 6 times with one response. My pic is nice, my profile seems to be in order. What's the deal?
If you keep taking that as rejection, you'll go mad. You can always paste your profile on the boards and people will give you constructive criticism to help you tweak it.

Remember, this is a numbers game. Typically, getting one in ten of your matches to communicate is a good score.

newtwo wrote :
And how to you call someone in Eharmony to find out if their paying or not? I'm about ready to give up.
They will tell you that it takes patience and time.
- September 9th, 2009, 06:50 am
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squeezebox69 squeezebox69 is offline
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In regards to people who cannot communicate because they are not a paying member: I don't think they should be able to look at matches and have their name matched to anyone. Here we paying members are reading their profiles---FOR WHAT? It is waste of time as far as I am concerned. Apparently they are cheap.
- September 11th, 2009, 06:59 pm
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in2numbers in2numbers is offline
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I am new as well, just since Sept 1 - again. I think this is my 3rd attempt w/eHarmony. I am an attractive, employed, pleasant 43 year old woman who just doesn't get why "this" is not working. Every photo request goes unanswered. Every icebreaker goes unreplied to. Am I just too "plain jane" for the internet dating world? Previous dates have commented on how "normal" I am and then never call back. Are men my age looking to recapture a 20/30 yr old? Are they looking for the party girls?No offense intended. I just don't get what I am doing wrong.
- September 12th, 2009, 04:47 pm
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linmac linmac is offline
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Non members can look at my profile and pictures?
- September 14th, 2009, 04:13 pm
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melman melman is offline
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Profile, yes - if they are matched with you, that is. Pictures, no.
- September 14th, 2009, 05:33 pm
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Givinguponlove Givinguponlove is offline
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I started a communication with one she gave me her number and no answer when I called . The next day she closed communication I have others that are taking it slow but I was just completely blind sided by someone playing games of being a tease ! She just put other for closeing the match.
- October 4th, 2009, 09:28 pm
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Gumbee Gumbee is offline
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in2numbers wrote :
I am new as well, just since Sept 1 - again. I think this is my 3rd attempt w/eHarmony. I am an attractive, employed, pleasant 43 year old woman who just doesn't get why "this" is not working. Every photo request goes unanswered. Every icebreaker goes unreplied to. Am I just too "plain jane" for the internet dating world? Previous dates have commented on how "normal" I am and then never call back. Are men my age looking to recapture a 20/30 yr old? Are they looking for the party girls?No offense intended. I just don't get what I am doing wrong.
I'm starting to feel the same way. I've been e-dumped 32 times in the last 2 weeks since joining. I'm a pretty good catch, have a really great profile, some good pics and I keep getting closed messages before any communication has commenced. The reasons are: 'Other', 'I'd rather not say', 'Based on statements in their profile I'm not interested in this match' and 'I don't feel the chemistry is there'. I can't help but think that men in my age range are not looking for women of my age.

I'm also starting to question these "29 points of compatibility" and wondering if eHarmony is matching based solely on the preferences we state. One match had 6 photos posted of himself in various stages of gutting a fish! Another stated he was a Dominant male looking for a submissive female. What in my personality profile would hint at those being compatible matches???

Frustrating!
- October 8th, 2009, 08:42 pm
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theweave theweave is offline
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Well I know this is an old thread but fairly active so here is my story.

The other morning I was just logging off the laptop to go to bed ( work night shift!) and an email came in saying I have a match. I thought "I will check tomorrow!" and logged off.

Well when I got up, lo and behold, she initiated with me! I am now waiting for her must have/can't stands.

I am flattered when a female starts with me! I have only had it twice but it is acceptable in my books!

We will see how it goes, but when she intiated, I knew she had to be a paying member!
- October 9th, 2009, 10:15 pm
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