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hazgoldens hazgoldens is offline
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Well, following the "free weekend" over the Labor Day holiday sure explains why my inboxwas inundated with numerous matches, none of which attempted communication. Most ofthese I've closed due to the fact that their profile pagewas limitedand generalized. I find it difficult to determine if the personis one I might be interesting in getting to know when given so little information about them. Hummmm, beside not permitting "freebies" to communicate, is it also the policy of eHarmonyto limit the amount of someone's profile because they are not paying customers?
- September 4th, 2008, 01:20 pm
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PJinGA PJinGA is offline
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Regarding the "Matches" who do no respond, well I was told, by one of the "e-Harmony" associates whom we are allowed to talk with.....whenever we call in to find out the answer to this mystery....."YES,some OF THESE ARE NOT CURRENTLY ACTIVE MEMBERS, AND BY SENDING THEM YOUR MATCH, THEY WILL HOPEFULLY SIGN UP AGAIN AND COMMUNICATE WITH THE MATCH WE HAVE CHOSEN FOR THEM"!!!!!I HAD SUSPECTED THIS BEFORE AND I FELL FOR THAT LINE AND RE-JOINED TO COMMUNICATE WITH THE MATCHES SENT ME, AND GUESS WHAT????? NO RESPONSES AT ALL FROM ANY OF THEM!!


IN FACT, I THINK MOST ALL ((WHICH FOR ME WERE CERTAINLY POOR CHOICES AND VERY FEW IN NUMBER, NOT AT ALL WHAT MY PROFILE SEEKS)) THE "MATCHES" SENT ME MUST BE BOGUS. THEIR SUCCESS RATES ARE MENTIONED FREQUENTLY IN MATCHING, BUT NOTHING ABOUT THE THOUSANDS WHO HAVE THROWN THEIR MONIES AWAY WITHOUT MEETING THE FIRST MATCH FROM THIS SITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


ANY OTHER SUCH INCIDENTS OUT THERE LIKE THIS, OR AM I THE ONLY ONE?????
- September 4th, 2008, 01:22 pm
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Spiritsoars54 Spiritsoars54 is offline
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I have been with eH for 8 or 9 months now and have yet to make a connection. Either there is no response to my initiating or they close before getting to open conversation. Frequently their reason is "other" or "no chemistry" which blows my mind since they haven't taken the time to get to know me at all!


I am extremely frustrated and an thinking about cancelling my membership. Any comments on how to be more desireable through this method of communication will be appreciated!


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- September 4th, 2008, 01:22 pm
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blackberry blackberry is offline
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :

Yes this is a very popular topic but we can go over it again, not a problem.


It is fine for the woman to begin communication. Most guys would welcome this and any that would not you really probably would not be interested in anyway. If a guy was put off by the girl starting the communication then he is going to be controlling in all decision making.


Now about your matches not having started communication yet. There could be any number of reasons but the most likely one is that they are not paying members therefore they cannot communicate. Get used to matches that do not communicate, a large percentage of your matches will be non-paying members and will not communicate.


By the way welcome to the Advice boards.
Thanks, I have several matches that have not started any communication - I was wondering the same thing. So why do non-members get matched if there is no communication?
- September 4th, 2008, 01:39 pm
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Althena Althena is offline
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For myself, I've been on Eh since the end of May. I've hada small number of matches initiate communication, but so far they've gone nowhere. I usually wait for the others to initiate, because I inform people on my profile that I have a disability. I just feel if they can look past this, they must really see something in my profile.





However, I've also started using the icebreaker ability. My way of saying, 'Hi, I'm interesed' without really having to initiate communication. Sadly,this hasn't worked in getting me anywhere.





And speaking of non-paying members, I'm getting pretty disgusted with this. I understand why they send us these matches, but I really wish they would screen them. In the last two days alone, I received a couple of matches that completely offended me. One person put as things they like to do in their leisure time as 'Farting and eating.' And today, someone put as things they were thankful for, 'Pornography and boobies.' Among other offensive comments.





If I may offer an opinion before I post this message... I like EH so far, but I'm getting pretty tired of these dud matches, partially filled out profiles, etc. Can't EH hire someone to screen these? Or am I wishing for the moon?
- September 4th, 2008, 01:46 pm
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thetruthhurts thetruthhurts is offline
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I've never understood why it's such a big deal for women to initiate communication, both in EH and in the real world. Why is so much thought and analysis put into it? When I want to do something in life, I just go for it! What ends up happening is that by hesitating women limit their universe of options.
- September 4th, 2008, 01:52 pm
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Tinderbox Tinderbox is offline
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CoteDuRhone wrote :

smichal, wrote :


Just wondering. I bet this topic has been covered a million times. I have 14 matches open right now but none of them have started a conversation. Are they not interested or shy? Is it ok for the woman to start a conversation?

I am new as well, and don't plan on initiating a conversation. If someone is interested, they will. If not, initiation from me will not make a difference.
I find it hard to believe that you'd be at a loss for words, CDR!
- September 4th, 2008, 01:59 pm
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Wagonwheel Wagonwheel is offline
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smichal, wrote :

Just wondering. I bet this topic has been covered a million times. I have 14 matches open right now but none of them have started a conversation. Are they not interested or shy? Is it ok for the woman to start a conversation?
I hope you get an answer to this question. I feel the same way only I'm a female. I've had a number of matches, have sent them my first set of questions but don't get any further than that. Just corresponding is fun, whether it leads to romance or not.





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- September 4th, 2008, 02:00 pm
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Tinderbox Tinderbox is offline
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niferlynne wrote :

smichal, wrote :


Just wondering. I bet this topic has been covered a million times. I have 14 matches open right now but none of them have started a conversation. Are they not interested or shy? Is it ok for the woman to start a conversation?

Sure, why not? I felt weird about it at first but went ahead and started communication with someone. We're getting married in a month!
Really?
(Can you hear the suspicion in my voice?)


How many matches and communications did it take before you found your fiance?
- September 4th, 2008, 02:02 pm
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Wagonwheel Wagonwheel is offline
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Julidee wrote :

I hope EH can feel the frustration from some of us. I am relatively new... only a month here and I have NEVER had any communication opened. I have had a few matches close saying "physical distance is too great", but I have a suspicion that the rest are not even living breathing human beings. Yes, I have initiated communication... but no response... ever.





*hits head against wall*
It definitely is a frustration and I totally agree with your 'suspicion'. Out of 23 matches (in two months) I've had one who has corresponded. Probably nothing will come out of it because he's so far away, but it's fun to correspond anyway.
- September 4th, 2008, 02:09 pm
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