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Tinasays Tinasays is offline
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I am glad to hear I'm not the only one who feels this way. I have been a member for over 8 months. Reached open communication with maybe 6 guys; 3 were out of State, but peeked my curiosity. I am afraid eh does leaveme feeling a bit insecure and disapointed. However I would rather not be matched with people that would only cause drama in my life. Thats why I am here, looking for the REAL thing and letting eh do the weeding out for me.


But I’m also wondering if this whole internet thing doesn't put us in the mind set of always looking for greener grass. If I was seeing someone from eh I would always wonder if he was checking his site after returning home from our date.But Im in for a year so I'll give the Lord the few more months to send Mr. Right my way.
- July 11th, 2008, 08:18 pm
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foucaultian foucaultian is offline
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japaneseblueeyes wrote :

Hmmm.....I already knew everything from this article. Still not getting more matches. Should I get a prize or something?
JBE:


I don't think you get a lot of matches because you live in Japan. If you lived in Colorado, you'd likely have more matches than you could handle! The remainder of this email does not apply to you


As for the rest... here's what I've seen here and from my personal experiences: if you live somewhere remote, you've already found that meeting someone locally is tough. Why would eHarmony be any different? If you wouldn't want to date someone 200 miles away, why would you expect someone else to want to date someone 200 miles away?


The thing about eHarmony is that it is membership driven -- you get more matches when greater numbers join. Larger cities are best because there are typically more eligible single people in large metropolian areas. If you live in a remote area, you have to be willing to expand your match radius to any place in your state -- and probably any place in your part of the entire country! What age range do you have listed? What religion range do you have listed? What ethnic range do you have listed? What importance do you place on income? Do you say that you won't date someone who has children?


All of these things are tiny lessons we get about dating: the pickier you are, the more difficult it is to find a great catch. Be more open minded and you'll see better results here and in all areas of your dating life.


If you aren't getting a lot of matches to communicate with you, then the only thing you can fix is you. What are you writing? Do you need to lose a few lbs? How are you coming across to your matches when you approach communication with them? Do you need to try filling out the personality profile again?


eHarmony offers a service that's been successful for a lot of people. One of my best friend's sister-in-law is marrying a man in a few weeks who she met here. I have several friends who've met their significant other through this site. It can work if you allow it to do its job. If you put limits on who you'll meet, then that's on you.


Foucaultian
- July 12th, 2008, 07:20 am
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jkyte jkyte is offline
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Well, just figured I'd chime in on this subject!! I have been on & off of EH for about 2 years now. You know, you do the intro offer and then it does you no good so you drop off, only to get enticed to come back on. Well, anyway this is how it seems to happen with me. I try it a while and then give up and quit, only to get conned back into another few months!!





I have changed my profile sooo many times, changes, changes and more changes, I think I've done it all!! I have had to date over; 1900 matches and not one date, not one!! I think I've been to the grand finale' maybe 8-10 times and still no date, no meeting. I realize my limitations. But I was once a very confident man, now I'm like God am I that BAD!!! I don't carry a lot of excess baggage around with me. I really do take care of myself, I work out daily, I have a fairly nice small business, consider myself to be a very open minded person. Maybe my profile sucks, don't know. I guess I just get so frustrated about the whole online, EH thing that I just put how I feel about our current situation and all. It may tend to make some ladies wonder about me, but I guess or thought it was better to let it hang out there and take the chance!! Am I wrong? Plus, I have pretty bad pictures and it is pretty hard to get honest advice on this type of thing. Don't have a lot of friends that I confide in that I do the Internet dating thingy.





But, I must admit I am very picky and anyone who says you shouldn't be, should take a HIKE!!!! Why in the world would you not be picky, I mean this is your life, her life that might hang in the balance with this stuff. Why is it so wrong to seek a certain type of person and want to stick to your guns about it?? It isn't wrong to do so. I would drive or travel any distance if I were to meet the right lady, to me it is worth it!! Why shouldn't it be worth it?? It is obvious that I have no answers and I am just as confused about the online dating scene as anyone alse is these days!!





I really don't think EH does that good of a job in the matches they send or whatever they do. Are we so conditioned to just accept second best, that we have come to expect that is all we can accomplish?? Make any sense?? I have been a single man again for going on 4 years now, so I know it isn't just a "it will take time" thing with me. Just my 2 cents worth. I get the matches senet to me and get plenty of them, IMHO. Just not the match that i want and I never, ever, ever respond to a match without a picture, Been there done that on the blind date thingy and I will not do it again. I don't think I'm a special guy, but I am not afraid to put my picture out for all to see. So, I would only expect the same in a lady that I'm interested in. I will admit it, I'm a very physical man so shoot me!!
- July 12th, 2008, 10:34 am
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kwilliams kwilliams is offline
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I'm 60. I have my photos posted and I have tried to be flexible in most areas. I've been getting matches, but once I respond or start communication, they drop off. I have even changed my 1st questions because I felt they may be too stringent. I'm not willing to change everything though! I have very definite things that I can't tolerate (you know what they say...set in her ways). I don't know what to do except keep trying. I won't give up!
- July 12th, 2008, 07:42 pm
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MaryfromLouisiana MaryfromLouisiana is offline
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MARY FROM LOUISIANA STILL HAS FOUND NO ONE........
I have tried everything, increasing my distance, increase the age range, etc. Still no success. I wonder if the people on eHarmony are REAL people, OR REALLY TRUE matches, and if they are, are they really looking for some type of relationship. I HAVE HAD MANY MATCHES CLOSE AND NEVER GIVE A REASON/ JUST OTHER!!!
WHAT IS THE PROBLEM? The matches are never in or around my town. Is there "ANYONE" in my town
looking to meet someone "NORMAL"????? I haven't figured out the problem yet and no one at eharmony can figure it out either.

WHAT IS WRONG?????????????????
- July 12th, 2008, 09:00 pm
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florabella florabella is offline
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I don't count how many, but the quality
- July 12th, 2008, 10:16 pm
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calidesigner calidesigner is offline
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Hi everyone,

I am new toeharmony and this is what i experienced here.
My first setting was "open" to meet people from oversees however I never got any matches.
Than I changed my setting to 20 miles around L.A. and 30-40% matches of my matches arewithout apicture, although my settings make itclear that I only want matches with apicture.

I am wondering if I will get any matchesthat actually fit to my settings. I paid for 3 months and havetwo months left, but I will definetly not pay longer.
I guess it works for some people not for everyone..
- July 13th, 2008, 03:08 pm
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foucaultian foucaultian is offline
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You can't create settings that indicate that you only want to be matched with people with a photo on eHarmony. You can say in your profile "please have a photo posted" or close everyone out who doesn't have a photo.


Here's something I think is a funny phenomenon: we live where we are and can't meet the right people. Yet, we ask eHarmony to introduce us only to people within a certain radius of our homes. That doesn't work, remember, because you're single :-)


If you want to meet someone through this forum or anywhere, you have to have an open mind. If you don't, then it's never going to happen.


Foucaultian
- July 13th, 2008, 07:53 pm
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calidesigner calidesigner is offline
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foucaultian wrote :

You can't create settings that indicate that you only want to be matched with people with a photo on eHarmony. You can say in your profile "please have a photo posted" or close everyone out who doesn't have a photo.


Here's something I think is a funny phenomenon: we live where we are and can't meet the right people. Yet, we ask eHarmony to introduce us only to people within a certain radius of our homes. That doesn't work, remember, because you're single :-)


If you want to meet someone through this forum or anywhere, you have to have an open mind. If you don't, then it's never going to happen.


Foucaultian
Yes, In my settings it specifies that I only want macthes with pictures...


I prefer to see the person who I am talking to...





- July 13th, 2008, 08:24 pm
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calidesigner calidesigner is offline
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calidesigner is happy.

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foucaultian wrote :

You can't create settings that indicate that you only want to be matched with people with a photo on eHarmony. You can say in your profile "please have a photo posted" or close everyone out who doesn't have a photo.


Here's something I think is a funny phenomenon: we live where we are and can't meet the right people. Yet, we ask eHarmony to introduce us only to people within a certain radius of our homes. That doesn't work, remember, because you're single :-)


If you want to meet someone through this forum or anywhere, you have to have an open mind. If you don't, then it's never going to happen.


Foucaultian
Yes, In my settings it specifies that I only want macthes with pictures...


I prefer to see the person who I am talking to...





- July 13th, 2008, 08:24 pm
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