Got matched with a coworker


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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #11  January 30,2012, 11:56am
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All I can manage is "SO?"

And maybe you should invite him to lunch.
 
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christa78 is offline christa78 Post #12  January 30,2012, 12:06pm
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KikiAZ wrote :
All I can manage is "SO?"
Then why bother to reply at all?
 
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christa78 is offline christa78 Post #13  January 30,2012, 12:07pm
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ScottK wrote :
Why???

He is on the same dating site as you...
He is doing EXACTLY the same thing as you!

HE and YOU are looking for the love of your lives.

Why in the WORLD is that "embarrassing" to you???

Unless you are cheating on your current husband/bf, there is NOTHING to be ashamed of, being on eHarmony.

PS: eHarmony isn't a seachable site.
He and you got matched together because eHarmony deemed you two as compatible.

I doubt I am the only person who would not want the entire office to know I am trying out eHarmony. My question wasn't about whether I was right or wrong to feel embarrassed. It was whether I should say something to him or ignore it.

Thanks for the more helpful responses, all. I just pretended it never happened, and I don't think he mentioned it to anybody (even though he seems to be the loud/open sort), so that was a bit of a relief.
 
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Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #14  January 30,2012, 12:12pm
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Mot mentioning anything to him is good. Now please go back in there and put your profile back online with a picture.

I work for a multinational company, and I have a very extensive network at work. I am sure, there is a reasonably good chance that some of the people who know me via work might have seen me on Eh. A lot of people try eH. Nothing is wrong with being on eH and looking for a partner. Please do not let one small "coworker being matched" incident get in the way of seeking happiness. If it happened to me, I couldn't even proceed even if I wanted because it would be aaginst our policies. So, get back in the game please .....
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #15  January 30,2012, 12:52pm
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christa78 wrote :
Then why bother to reply at all?
To add another tally to the "I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill" column. You're single. He is single. It's not like it's a alternative sex website, it's EHARMONY!

Actually I * had *edited to add something else but it isn't there. Or is being modded. Basically suggesting you ask him to lunch.
 
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Ingytravel is offline Ingytravel Post #16  January 30,2012, 2:21pm
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Please don't take down your photos.....It's going to be extremely rare that you match again with another co-worker. They have to be single, in your age range, and match the 29 dimensions through EH as well as your preferences....

EH is not a searchable site like others and the upside of having your photos (many less closes) should outweigh the perceived negative of matching with someone you know.

He may be an outgoing guy but most people are mature enough to blab around your office. And even if shared with someone...what's the worst he could say, "Hey Joe...you know how I am doing online dating? I matched up with Sally in marketing...".....

And....He is doing the exact same thing as you....online dating....1 in 5 people now meet their partners through online dating. It's not a big deal anymore whatsoever as opposed to 20 years ago and doing video dating. Literally every few minutes there is a commercial about an online dating website.....

So...not trying to scold you....just trying to say that there really isn't any need to be embarrassed....people meet their partners in all sorts of ways..

I just want to implore you to not take down your photos because of this. Many people will close instantly without a picture...(I certainly do)....

I wish you luck in the future!
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #17  January 31,2012, 8:14am
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I came back to say sorry I was snotty yesterday.

I was matched with my kid's friend's dad. I was matched with my next door neighbor. I didn't date either of those guys. THEN I was matched with the guy who is my bf. Don't give up on the process or hamstring yourself because of this.
 
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christa78 is offline christa78 Post #18  January 31,2012, 5:29pm
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KikiAZ wrote :
I came back to say sorry I was snotty yesterday.

I was matched with my kid's friend's dad. I was matched with my next door neighbor. I didn't date either of those guys. THEN I was matched with the guy who is my bf. Don't give up on the process or hamstring yourself because of this.
No worries, I did make a mountain out of a molehill. Just took a day or two to gain perspective.
 
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