How to word "lets just be friends"


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PG-13 is offline PG-13 Post #1  January 28,2012, 10:34am
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Okay sage and wise members of the board,

I have this idea of putting somewhere at the end of my profile "I strongly dislike when I go on a great date and get hit with lets just be friends" but I dont want it to sound mean or immature. Should I have that at all and if I do, whats the best phrasing (it would go in the additional information section)
 
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Ephemera is offline Ephemera Post #2  January 28,2012, 10:40am
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I strongly dislike a lot of things but don't put any of them in my profile. And I almost never even mention them to first dates, or even second dates, as really, who cares what I like and dislike if they are not sharing time with me? And a profile is not the place to sound negative or judgemental or needy. Just suck it up and find yourself an astonishingly clever come-back phrase when some guy throws the let's be friends thing at you. Hopefully a phrase that makes him question what he is now going to be missing.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #3  January 28,2012, 10:48am
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Ephemera wrote :
And a profile is not the place to sound negative or judgemental or needy.
I'd leave it off for this reason right here. There's really not a way to phrase this that comes off with you looking good. You want your profile to leave people thinking that you're someone they should meet.
 
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Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #4  January 28,2012, 10:50am
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Honestly?...not a good idea...Why?... it tells the women you are being friendzoned a lot.

There actually is no clever cut to the chase wording for this ...Why?....They will either click with you or not on the date not before.

Why make a profile that bad.....seriously?.....Good luck....
PG-13 wrote :
I have this idea of putting somewhere at the end of my profile "I strongly dislike when I go on a great date and get hit with lets just be friends"

but I dont want it to sound mean or immature. Should I have that at all and if I do, whats the best phrasing (it would go in the additional information section)
 
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upstategirl is offline upstategirl Post #5  January 28,2012, 10:56am
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I hope you are kidding.....do not put anything like that in your profile.
 
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EccentricAmbiguity is offline EccentricAmbiguity Post #6  January 28,2012, 10:59am
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Ughhh...wow. The only people that you should state that to would be those who wouldn't be interested in you. Those are not your target audience. And by stating that this happens to you a lot has now turned off at least half of your target audience. Its basically like saying "I really hate being rejected." Awesome.
 
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Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #7  January 28,2012, 11:04am
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I hope you are cured of this idea by now ? Please do not do it, it will be a very big turn off for any woman who reads it.
 
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PG-13 is offline PG-13 Post #8  January 28,2012, 11:16am
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so apparently too snarky/meta for a profile... gotcha... Im still trying to figure out how to incorporate snark/sarcasm into my profile, so I should probably ask that question next... because its definitely something I prefer in my matches, but its tricky how to get that across in purely written form (I half wish there was "sarcastic" in the must haves)
 
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Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #9  January 28,2012, 11:26am
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Why not leave sarcasm out....."sarcastic humor" is so cliche and dated....It's no longer cool...it just says "jerk" who has lived under a rock for five years when it used to be cool.
It's a new world since you last dated apparently....
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #10  January 28,2012, 11:41am
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PG-13 wrote :
so apparently too snarky/meta for a profile... gotcha...
It's not that it's snarky, it's that it says you're rejected often and seem to be wounded by it instead of handling it maturely.

wrote :
Im still trying to figure out how to incorporate snark/sarcasm into my profile
You can state that you have a "sarcastic" sense of humor and appreciate "sarcasm" in your matches. The matching algorithm will then tend to find you people with those keywords in their profile. I ran across a few matches with those keywords in their profiles, so it may be premature to declare sarcasm dead.

Sarcastic humor is tricky in your profile because the reader can't see your tone or body language and may be scanning very quickly. If you're going to attempt to display and judge sarcasm online, I'd save it for the second questions. A variation of the "Three Wishes" question can be great for bringing out someone's sense of humor. I say a variation, because you may need to hint you're not looking for "world peace" in the answer! I've answered that one so many different ways, seriously to absurdly.
 
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