"Don't judge a book by its cover"


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inthevagueschemeofthings is offline inthevagueschemeofthings Post #1  January 22,2012, 6:03am
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I've actually had some success with eHarmony, so I'm not complaining, but I've noticed an amusing trend. I've read a lot of profiles that request not to be judged by their initial appearance. Fair enough. I've contacted quite a few of these matches, but they all ignore me. Does this happen to anyone else? Again, I get responses from other matches and I've had my profile reviewed, so no issue there. I'm just curious.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #2  January 22,2012, 7:07am
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Remember, most of your matches are going to be non-paying members who can't respond.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #3  January 22,2012, 10:31am
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inthevagueschemeofthings wrote :
I've noticed an amusing trend. I've read a lot of profiles that request not to be judged by their initial appearance.
Ah yes, the ones that don't want to be judged, but want to judge, often harshly and hypocritically, others. Fun stuff.
 
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Dropdeadredtx is offline Dropdeadredtx Post #4  January 22,2012, 5:51pm
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They may not be 'judging' you, but maybe you just aren't their cup of tea. Everyone has different tastes.
 
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ami1uwant is offline ami1uwant Post #5  January 22,2012, 6:27pm
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inthevagueschemeofthings wrote :
I've contacted quite a few of these matches, but they all ignore me. .

Its quite possible they are non paying memebers who cant communicate with you.

They could have viewed you as a nonpaying member.

If they are a paying member then they likely are hypocrits.
 
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barbarella_42 is offline barbarella_42 Post #6  January 22,2012, 6:31pm
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inthevagueschemeofthings wrote :
I've actually had some success with eHarmony, so I'm not complaining, but I've noticed an amusing trend. I've read a lot of profiles that request not to be judged by their initial appearance. Fair enough. I've contacted quite a few of these matches, but they all ignore me. Does this happen to anyone else? Again, I get responses from other matches and I've had my profile reviewed, so no issue there. I'm just curious.
That sort of request would irk me and I wouldn't respond on principle alone. It comes across like a double standard, which is bad enough, but also implicitly suggests that if the person reading the profile isn't willing to do as the poster demands, there's something wrong with the reader.

Like it or not, online dating is sales and marketing. Making the product as enticing as possible (both visually and in writing) matters. Making excuses for why the product doesn't look appealing t'aint gonna convince anyone to invest time and effort.

Someone mentioned elsewhere that pictures are misleading and shouldn't be the sole determinant of whether one contacts a potential match, and that's quite right. I would rather make that decision myself, though, instead of someone demanding that I make it.
 
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mhawkins258 is offline mhawkins258 Post #7  January 24,2012, 3:55pm
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ami1uwant wrote :
Its quite possible they are non paying memebers who cant communicate with you.
Anyone else find it really annoying how you can't distinguish paying from non-paying members? My matches are rare and far inbetween and the few that I've initiated contact with, don't even care to reply or close me out. I just get left hanging. eHarmony should do a better job of filtering active members or pushing inactive members to take action.
 
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tangochef is offline tangochef Post #8  January 24,2012, 5:35pm
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mhawkins258 wrote :
Anyone else find it really annoying how you can't distinguish paying from non-paying members? ...
Actually, it is very easy to distinguish. Non-paying members are those that do not contact you. Paying members are those that do.
 
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Dropdeadredtx is offline Dropdeadredtx Post #9  January 24,2012, 9:18pm
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tangochef wrote :
Actually, it is very easy to distinguish. Non-paying members are those that do not contact you. Paying members are those that do.
Hahaha!!!!
 
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boomer_gal is offline boomer_gal Post #10  January 24,2012, 9:32pm
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tangochef wrote :
Actually, it is very easy to distinguish. Non-paying members are those that do not contact you. Paying members are those that do.
Wow... I wish I had your level of success.
 
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