cookiemonster7 is offline cookiemonster7 Post #1  January 12,2012, 2:05pm
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Hi everyone,
I'm sure this topic has been done several times before but since I couldn't find find a thread that talked specifically about it, I thought I'd ask...

How many women out there are the first to send those 5 questions to any potentials?

Guys, is this attractive?

I am somewhat of a traditionalist when it comes to dating (despite doing the online thing, lol) and I usually like to let the guys approach me. My experience has been that the ones I send questions or icebreakers to usually take forever to reply, therefore I think they aren't interested and usually end up closing the match after it's dragged on forever.

Thoughts please!
 
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dmi is online now dmi Post #2  January 12,2012, 2:16pm
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If they send questions first you know they're interested, but, whether they are interested or not really has little to do with who sent the questions first. The disadvantage of sending questions is you don't know if they are interested. The advantage is if they are interested, but, sorting through a bunch of matches, you might move yourself to the front of the line as far as people they meet. If you don't send questions first, you could potentially lose out to another woman who does.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #3  January 12,2012, 2:20pm
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cookiemonster7 wrote :
Hi everyone,
I'm sure this topic has been done several times before but since I couldn't find find a thread that talked specifically about it, I thought I'd ask...

That's because the search function on here sucks royal.

How many women out there are the first to send those 5 questions to any potentials?

I don't know how many do, but there are plenty.

Guys, is this attractive?

Showing interest is attractive, so yes.

I am somewhat of a traditionalist when it comes to dating (despite doing the online thing, lol) and I usually like to let the guys approach me. My experience has been that the ones I send questions or icebreakers to usually take forever to reply, therefore I think they aren't interested and usually end up closing the match after it's dragged on forever.

Don't be so quick to close out someone for not answering right away. They're likely to be busy communicating with / dating other matches which is what you should be doing too. It doesn't hurt to leave a match open for awhile. Since so many matches fizzle out before they reach relationship stage, there's a chance they'll be back.

Thoughts please!
Send first questions to anyone who looks interesting and close the ones that aren't. You're paying for a service so use it to its full potential.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  January 12,2012, 4:22pm
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What tweet and dmi said.

Also if you are a paying member do not send IceBreakers. IceBreakers are widely viewed as an indication that the person is a non-paying member because it is the only form of communication that a non-paying member can do. Many people will not respond to an IceBreaker, some will close if they receive one.
 
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itswhatev is offline itswhatev Post #5  January 12,2012, 6:57pm
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Great advice Gr8Guyn2008.

Every case is different, many women have requested GC to me. I didn't respond to any of them. Maybe, I'm too picky.. I did however request 7 or so people in a 4/5 month span and got through to email on 3 of them..
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #6  January 12,2012, 7:05pm
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What Tweet and DMI and Gr8guy said, but... When it takes the guy 2 weeks to get through every single stage, and only after you've nudged him on every step, I vote for "not that interested" over "busy". Any time I have gotten to OC with one of those slower-than-molasses responders, they always peter out without leading to a meeting.
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #7  January 13,2012, 12:22am
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cookiemonster7 wrote :
How many women out there are the first to send those 5 questions to any potentials?
Quite a few. All the eH women I pursued the last few months.

wrote :
Guys, is this attractive?
A tiny bit. The main advantage, for you, is that I'm certain to look at you. If you don't initiate, you may be waiting awhile before I spot you, if ever.
 
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redmaple is offline redmaple Post #8  January 13,2012, 6:33am
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cookiemonster7 wrote :
Hi everyone,
I'm sure this topic has been done several times before but since I couldn't find find a thread that talked specifically about it, I thought I'd ask...

How many women out there are the first to send those 5 questions to any potentials?

Guys, is this attractive?

I am somewhat of a traditionalist when it comes to dating (despite doing the online thing, lol) and I usually like to let the guys approach me. My experience has been that the ones I send questions or icebreakers to usually take forever to reply, therefore I think they aren't interested and usually end up closing the match after it's dragged on forever.

Thoughts please!
I am a woman and I totally appreciate a guy who will take the lead, but I initiate communication if I'm interested in someone. All of the guys I've met have naturally taken the lead once we've met in person.

I also agree with others about the icebreakers. When I get an icebreaker, I usually figure it's a "newbie" or a non paying member. I respond with 5 questions if I'm interested because icebreakers really get you nowhere.

If things are dragging on, it's definitely a sure bet that you're not on the top of their list (either communicating with / dating others or really only marginally interested in you). There's no harm in leaving the match open, but it is probably an indicator of low interest.
 
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