Profile Review: 41 year old female

I have been on EH for a couple of weeks now and like to get perspective on my profile as I have had two people initiate conversation. I have initiated guided communication with others and some have responded, while others have merely just viewed the profile (and take no action). See the information below.

Basic Information

Occupation:Welder
Age41
Height5' 4"
Wants Kids:Maybe
Kids at Home:Yes
EthnicityAfrican-American
Religion:Christian
Drinks:Never
Smokes:Never


1. What are you most passionate about? one thing I am most passionate about:
I am passionate about making a difference in the lives of children in foster care.... Do you volunteer or have foster kids?..Why is it your passion? Expand on this a bit

2. What are the THREE things for which you are MOST thankful?
You can use this section for some serious topics or have some fun with witty /lively answers...Being alive and well is a little ordinary and obvious..think of something more unique about you...
Thankful to be alive.
Thankful to be healthy.
Thankful for my 2 children

3. Other than your parents, who has been the most influential person in your life and why?

My daughter has been the most influential because she has graduated college with an engineering degree and is about to finish her MBA. This is very nice..expand on how you inspired her or she you.

4. The most important thing I am looking for in a person is: Try to state the more about qualities in a person you admire..we all want someone who accepts us, try to avoid "I want" or wish-list style wording
I want someone that will accept me for me. Additionally, I want to find someone that is honest and likes to do similar activities as myself.

5. Three of my best life-skills are:
Maintaining an organized life
Raising and/or caring for children
Achieving personal goals

6. The things I can't live without:
my kids There is a mention of kids...try to even say fun things here like some of your favorite daily things
friends

7. The first thing people notice about me:
People notice that I am very caring of others.

8. I typically spend my leisure time:
I enjoy shopping, spending time with family, and travelling to new places. Try to mention things men can picture doing with you that are fun, also some activities as well as interests

9. The last book I read and enjoyed:
I really enjoyed Your Best Life Now By Joel Osteen. I enjoy his positive outlook on life and religion.
10. My friends describe me as:

• Dependable
• Caring
• Loyal
• Generous

two photos are posted.

Thanks in advance for the feedback.

Basic Information
Occupation:Welder
Age41
Height5' 4"
Wants Kids:Maybe
Kids at Home:Yes
EthnicityAfrican-American
Religion:Christian
Drinks:Never
Smokes:Never

Drinks never is something that I take as a negative, since it means our dining habits are quite different. Some people (those who like their unfounded assumptions) also like to intepret this as "used to be a drunk."

I would add some detail to welder, since this is an occupation that may involve odd or unpredictable hours, locations, etc. Especially if you work regular hours during the day, I'd find a way to imply that.


1. What are you most passionate about? one thing I am most passionate about:
I am passionate about making a difference in the lives of children in foster care.

This is a fine theme, but bad answer. Add to it with details, examples, or the reasons for this motivation. Best is to make it so your matches can understand how your passion will impact them.


2. What are the THREE things for which you are MOST thankful?

Thankful to be alive.
Thankful to be healthy.
Thankful for my 2 children

Say why in each answer. These are too generic.


3. Other than your parents, who has been the most influential person in your life and why?

My daughter has been the most influential because she has graduated college with an engineering degree and is about to finish her MBA.

I like this theme, but go on to say why. Make a more personal story. And remember, this is your profile, not hers.

Ways to do this include, "Watching my daughter complete her MBA, I learned ..."


4. The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
I want someone that will accept me for me. Additionally, I want to find someone that is honest and likes to do similar activities as myself.

I would bin this and start over:

- Good people are honest. It's critical to indicate your background is amoung good people, and that baseline expectations are to be expected (even if you're not so fortunate.)

- Accept me for me is code for "I'm overweight and demanding." This type of attitude should come out of your profile.

- Pick one thing and expand on that, not a list. Of your ideas here, I'd go with the similar activities (it's the safest.)


5. Three of my best life-skills are:
Maintaining an organized life
Raising and/or caring for children
Achieving personal goals

6. The things I can't live without:
my kids
friends

Again, say why.


7. The first thing people notice about me:
People notice that I am very caring of others.

Add an example.


8. I typically spend my leisure time:
I enjoy shopping, spending time with family, and travelling to new places.

Again, detail, examples.

Shopping may be risky, as some men are going to read that as on his money.


9. The last book I read and enjoyed:
I really enjoyed Your Best Life Now By Joel Osteen. I enjoy his positive outlook on life and religion.

Another short answer.


10. My friends describe me as:

• Dependable
• Caring
• Loyal
• Generous

Thanks for the great feedback. I've incorporated both perspectives into my profile below.

Occupation:Welder
Age41
Height5' 4"
Wants Kids:Maybe
Kids at Home:Yes
EthnicityAfrican-American
Religion:Christian
Drinks:Never
Smokes:Never


1. What are you most passionate about? one thing I am most passionate about:
I am passionate about making a difference in the lives of children in foster care. Once my daughter went to college I decided to use some of my time fostering children. I felt I had done an excellent job with my own child and decided to begin fostering children. I feel bad for the children in the ‘system’ because they feel unwanted and I do not believe that anyone should feel unwanted. I had a few kids come into my home and adopted the last child that was in my home (the first to be available for adoption). I have had him since he was a newborn and he is now 3 years old. I am glad I was able to assist many and actually adopt 1 child. I believe that everyone should have a stable home and feel secure.

I think this answer is excellent. It's specific, and connects the "passion" to actions.

I do expect that some matches will not wish to deal with the implications of a young child, so they will close you (better that than waste your time, though.)


2. What are the THREE things for which you are MOST thankful?
Thankful to be alive and healthy because I had cancer early in my daughter’s childhood. I had the support of my family and am grateful that I had the opportunity to come out of that and not have the cancer come back.
Thankful for my job because it’s interesting and not a typical job for a woman and does allow me to work normal hours to spend time with my children
Thankful for my 2 children because they make me laugh. I have a great bond with each and enjoy having great family time with them.

These really stand out from what is typically written.


3. Other than your parents, who has been the most influential person in your life and why?

My daughter has been the most influential because she has graduated college with an engineering degree and is about to finish her MBA. I have always instilled in her that she could do anything she could put her mind to and her success has proven that. It has inspired me to push my adopted child to the same standard. Even though he does not have my genes, I know that he can do the same.

Nice.


4. The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
I am looking for someone that likes to do similar activities as myself. I am looking for someone to go on adventures with and someone who is spontaneous enough to travel. I am a huge fan of the Dallas Cowboys and would like to share the interest of watching sports (even if he is not a fan of this team due to their tough season).

Didn't you mean to say you're a CheeseHead?!


5. Three of my best life-skills are:
Maintaining an organized life
Raising and/or caring for children
Achieving personal goals

6. The things I can't live without:
My kids because they keep me entertained particularly in the morning when my son tries to trick me into allowing him to get more sleep.
Friends because it’s nice to reminisce about old times and also make new memories with those that know me best
My car because I like going places
My phone because I love to talk
God because he continues to bless me with great things in life like my health, children, and a successful career

7. The first thing people notice about me:
People notice that I am very caring of others. My care of others show when I am caring for children that are not mine, through foster care. I find kids to be the most innocent beings and want to show them that people want to be a part of their lives.

8. I typically spend my leisure time:
I enjoy shopping, going to basketball games with my kids, spending time with family, travelling to new places, cheering for my Dallas Cowboys (when they win and lose), trying different recipes with my daughter, and riding bikes with my kids.

9. The last book I read and enjoyed:
I really enjoyed Your Best Life Now By Joel Osteen. I enjoy his positive outlook on life and religion. This book shows that through scripture one can live a better life and reach ones full potential. He encourages people to live a life of purpose and enlarge ones vision in life. This book has put me on a path to discover my real purpose on this earth.


10. My friends describe me as:

• Dependable
• Caring
• Loyal
• Generous

Thanks for the great feedback. I've incorporated both perspectives into my profile below.

Occupation:Welder
Age41
Height5' 4"
Wants Kids:Maybe
Kids at Home:Yes
EthnicityAfrican-American
Religion:Christian
Drinks:Never
Smokes:Never

Still agree with DLion on drinks never---you should put something else unless you have an alcoholic problems with yourself or your past.


1. What are you most passionate about? one thing I am most passionate about:
I am passionate about making a difference in the lives of children in foster care. Once my daughter went to college I decided to use some of my time fostering children. I felt I had done an excellent job with my own child and decided to begin fostering children. I feel bad for the children in the ‘system’ because they feel unwanted and I do not believe that anyone should feel unwanted. I had a few kids come into my home and adopted the last child that was in my home (the first to be available for adoption). I have had him since he was a newborn and he is now 3 years old. I am glad I was able to assist many and actually adopt 1 child. I believe that everyone should have a stable home and feel secure.


2. What are the THREE things for which you are MOST thankful?
Thankful to be alive and healthy because I had cancer early in my daughter’s childhood. I had the support of my family and am grateful that I had the opportunity to come out of that and not have the cancer come back.
Thankful for my job because it’s interesting and not a typical job for a woman and does allow me to work normal hours to spend time with my children
Thankful for my 2 children because they make me laugh. I have a great bond with each and enjoy having great family time with them.

3. Other than your parents, who has been the most influential person in your life and why?

My daughter has been the most influential because she has graduated college with an engineering degree and is about to finish her MBA. I have always instilled in her that she could do anything she could put her mind to and her success has proven that. It has inspired me to push my adopted child to the same standard. Even though he does not have my genes, I know that he can do the same.


4. The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
I am looking for someone that likes to do similar activities as myself. I am looking for someone to go on adventures with and someone who is spontaneous enough to travel. I am a huge fan of the Dallas Cowboys and would like to share the interest of watching sports (even if he is not a fan of this team due to their tough season).

Try to get specific--not generic. what is adventure to you? Was is spontaneous travel? Have you done this on your own or do you need a man to do it?.

5. Three of my best life-skills are:
Maintaining an organized life
Raising and/or caring for children
Achieving personal goals

6. The things I can't live without:
My kids because they keep me entertained particularly in the morning when my son tries to trick me into allowing him to get more sleep.
Friends because it’s nice to reminisce about old times and also make new memories with those that know me best
My car because I like going places
My phone because I love to talk
God because he continues to bless me with great things in life like my health, children, and a successful career

7. The first thing people notice about me:
People notice that I am very caring of others. My care of others show when I am caring for children that are not mine, through foster care. I find kids to be the most innocent beings and want to show them that people want to be a part of their lives.

8. I typically spend my leisure time:
I enjoy shopping, going to basketball games with my kids, spending time with family, travelling to new places, cheering for my Dallas Cowboys (when they win and lose), trying different recipes with my daughter, and riding bikes with my kids.

9. The last book I read and enjoyed:
I really enjoyed Your Best Life Now By Joel Osteen. I enjoy his positive outlook on life and religion. This book shows that through scripture one can live a better life and reach ones full potential. He encourages people to live a life of purpose and enlarge ones vision in life. This book has put me on a path to discover my real purpose on this earth.


10. My friends describe me as:

• Dependable
• Caring
• Loyal
• Generous