Profile review for 55 female please

In addition, it does show kids at home. I have one 14 year old. But, didn't my matches agree that kids at home was okay? Should I say something about my daughter in my profile?

I look young for my age. Could that be a problem?

I'm concerned about sharing that with matches, if any of them would respond. Do people ask early on why your looking, or what your circumstances are? Can I wait a long time to share that info? Or should it come out sooner? Thanks for your advice in this area.

I enjoy camping and some travel around the state. I contribute time to environmental issues. I am committed to helping others and doing my part. I am passionate about family, friends, a nice home and nature. I believe in love.

I am looking for loving companionship. I want a good, sweet man to spend time with, taking care of our lives together - shopping, chores, errands, home repairs, yard work, car rides, the beach, camping, checking new stuff out, flea markets. Not a big life, but a good one. I'm not sure all of this is a quality, but it's what I want. A life companion to work and play with. I'm fun to spend time with and easy to get along with. Really....

Finance Manager for an elementary school
55
5' 5"
No
Yes

I've had a variety of people throughout my life who have each influenced me at different times for different reasons.

I moved a lot in my younger years and didn't have a long term influencer.. He set a good example in so many ways and I learned so much about life from him.

My dad really was the best. I was raised in the military until college and my Dad taught me to follow rules, represent yourself well, earn a good reputation and do things for others when you are able to.

I am most thankful for friends that support and encourage me as we spend time together.

I am thankful for time spent with friends and family before they are gone. I am very aware of the fragility of life.

I am thankful for the outdoors. Beauty to look at and places to feel peace.

Being a good friend and companion
Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things
Managing my finances

This is hard to answer. Nothing really I would want someone to notice. But if I have to share something, I would say it more like this....It takes time to know and trust people. Time to learn whose judgment to trust in. I would like people to know sooner that

I can be trusted, have good judgment and I have had a wide variety of healthy life experiences to draw upon.

Coffee-quiet time in the morning
Cell phone to keep information at my fingertips
Good friends that are really family
Family - my daughter, my parents (is that 3?)
My Jeep, if it's not in the shop...

Often, people comment that I ask a lot of questions. I try to listen well to people and I want to understand and feel their story.

I like to tell short personal stories and I enjoy hearing others as well.

I'm new to e-harmony and somewhat new to dating again. A little shy about all of this...

I enjoy camping and I have a nice little camper. I have a camping spot close to where I live, so it's easy to go down to the river for dinner, an evening or a weekend. I also have a beautiful moose head in my living room. That must tell you something about me...?

Camping, antique hunting and yard sales. I thrive with a little time outdoors by water. I enjoy looking at property for sale. I have family in the northern UP, so a few trips up there each year are fun. I enjoy cooking and working on home improvement projects.

I read a lot for my job, so most of my outside reading seems to be the "how to do anything better" type. No novels for awhile.

I did just read "Money Secrets of the Amish" written by a local author. It's about... how they find contentment with simple needs and hard work.

Genuine
Caring
Intelligent
Hard Working

Thank you for any insight you can provide. I don't hear from many men at all, considering we are pre-matched. We must have a lot of similar traits and interests, but no interest on their part.
Most (about 90%) of your matches are going to be non-paying members who can't respond. The good news is that this weekend is a Free Communication Weekend (FCW) so they can communicate for free if they are active on eHarmony and are interested in you.

I am concerned that a lot of my matches play golf or ride motorcycles. Two things I have no interest in. I'm wondering if because so much of my profile has outdoor interests, that's what's matching me with them. It's not that simple, is it?
You are matched based on how you answered that long Personality Profile Questionnaire when you signed up. That is where the 29 Dimensions of Compatibility come from. Your profile has little to do with matching. The golf and motorcycle thing has to do a lot with who you are. You are a professional, a lot of professional men play golf. You are 55, i.e. middle aged, a lot of middle aged men have lost their grip on common sense and are into motorcycles.

In addition, it does show kids at home. I have one 14 year old. But, didn't my matches agree that kids at home was okay? Should I say something about my daughter in my profile?
Yes, your matches have said that they will accept women with children at home. This of course does not mean that they really are that interested in someone with children still living at home. As I am in your age group I would wonder exactly how old your children are if you say that they are living with you as I would expect that a 55 year old woman would have adult children and likely have grandchildren as that is the case for most of my matches who are even a bit younger than you. Now if I found out you have a 14 year old, looking long term and that we were a true match, I would be thinking it is 4 or 5 years before your child is out of high school, then possibly living with you while going to college, so basically you would be 65 and I would be 70 before your child is out of the house and we were alone. I am just telling you how I analyze a match.

I have uploaded five pictures of just myself. I think they're good, my friends think they're good. I look young for my age. Could that be a problem?
If you are looking younger and are in good shape physically this can only be an asset.

One more question, since some of you are willing to help a newbie out. I've been divorced for a while. My boyfriend passed away this past year. I'm concerned about sharing that with matches, if any of them would respond. Do people ask early on why your looking, or what your circumstances are? Can I wait a long time to share that info? Or should it come out sooner? Thanks for your advice in this area.
I have never asked about my matches "history", but they always bring up why / how they are single. As a long time member on these Advice boards it seems that many people, both men and women, do ask questions about your "history". I see no reason to volunteer this information but be prepared to answer the questions because it is likely your matches are going to ask.

Well, here I am:

The one thing I am most passionate about:
I enjoy camping and some travel around the state. I contribute time to environmental issues. I am committed to helping others and doing my part. I am passionate about family, friends, a nice home and nature. I believe in love.
What you have presented here is not bad but how you have presented it is not good. It is a bit disconnected, the way you have it written you are talking about several different things. The question is for the ONE thing you are most passionate about. You should think about re-writing it, think about it as telling a story.

The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
I am looking for loving companionship. I want a good, sweet man to spend time with, taking care of our lives together - shopping, chores, errands, home repairs, yard work, car rides, the beach, camping, checking new stuff out, flea markets. Not a big life, but a good one. I'm not sure all of this is a quality, but it's what I want, a life companion to work and play with. I'm fun to spend time with and easy to get along with. Really....
I am going to let this pass. I don't really like the big list of things to do but I will let it pass.

Basic Information
Occupation: Finance Manager for an elementary school
Age 55
Height 5' 5"
Wants Kids: No
Kids at Home: Yes (does your child live FULL TIME with you or is there shared custody?)

The most influential person in my life has been:
I've had a variety of people throughout my life who have each influenced me at different times for different reasons. I moved a lot in my younger years and didn't have anyone long term as an influence. My dad really was the best. He set a good example in so many ways and I learned so much about life from him. I was raised in the military until college and my dad taught me to follow rules, represent yourself well, earn a good reputation and do things for others when you are able to.
This is good.

The three things which I am most thankful for:
I am most thankful for friends that support and encourage me as we spend time together.

I am thankful for time spent with friends and family before they are gone. I am very aware of the fragility of life.

I am thankful for the outdoors. Beauty to look at and places to feel peace.
This is good.

Three of my best life-skills are:
Being a good friend and companion
Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things
Managing my finances

The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:
This is hard to answer. Nothing really I would want someone to notice. But if I have to share something, I would say it more like this....It takes time to know and trust people, time to learn whose judgment to trust. I would like people to know sooner that I can be trusted, have good judgment and I have had a wide variety of healthy life experiences to draw upon.
This is good.

The things I can't live without are:
Coffee-quiet time in the morning
Cell phone to keep information at my fingertips
Good friends that are really family
Family - my daughter, my parents (is that 3?)
My Jeep, if it's not in the shop... (I think this may be sending the wrong message)
This is good.

The first thing people notice about me:
Often, people comment that I ask a lot of questions. I try to listen well to people and I want to understand and feel their story. I like to tell short personal stories and I enjoy hearing others as well.
This is good.

Some additional information I want you to know:
I'm new to eHarmony and somewhat new to dating again.(I wouldn't put this in) A little shy about all of this... I enjoy camping and I have a nice little camper. I have a camping spot close to where I live, so it's easy to go down to the river for dinner, an evening or a weekend. I also have a beautiful moose head in my living room. That must tell you something about me...? (the moose head bit would freak me out but I suspect the right guy is going to be totally cool with this)
This is good but take note of my comments above.

I typically spend my leisure time:
Camping, antique hunting and yard sales. I thrive with a little time outdoors by water. I enjoy looking at property for sale. I have family in the northern UP, so a few trips up there each year are fun. I enjoy cooking and working on home improvement projects.
I would rearrange this some. Camping goes with all the outdoors stuff. Antiques and yard sales belong together. I presume that your matches are going to know what "UP" means, if not spell it out for stupid people like me.

The last book I read and enjoyed:
I read a lot for my job, so most of my outside reading seems to be the "how to do anything better" type. No novels for awhile. I did just read "Money Secrets of the Amish" written by a local author. It's about, well....money secrets of the Amish. How they find contentment with simple needs and hard work.
This is good.

My friends describe me as:
Genuine
Caring
Intelligent
Hard Working
　
Thank you!!!
　

Kids at Home: Yes (does your child live FULL TIME
with you or is there shared custody?)

Thank you for any insight you can provide. I don't hear from many men at all, considering we are pre-matched. We must have a lot of similar traits and interests, but no interest on their part.
Most profiles are like dead driftwood, drifting across your inbox, just to tempt you to send money.

I am concerned that a lot of my matches play golf or ride motorcycles. Two things I have no interest in. I'm wondering if because so much of my profile has outdoor interests, that's what's matching me with them. It's not that simple, is it?

Most of my matches know the name of multiple television shows and celebrities - two things I have no interets in. Do I close them for it? I do not.

I would try, at least once, a hobby my match enjoyed. But, before that, what harm is there in enjoying a nice dinner? Just because a person has a turbo kit on his 'Busa doesn't mean he won't be fun in bed (the part that matters.)


In addition, it does show kids at home. I have one 14 year old. But, didn't my matches agree that kids at home was okay? Should I say something about my daughter in my profile?

I'd skip the fawning child-adulation so common to profiles, but I would mention having a child (include the number of children, and ages living at home), and add some detail only when the child has a noteworthy acheivement.


I have uploaded five pictures of just myself. I think they're good, my friends think they're good. I look young for my age. Could that be a problem?

Show them, and we will tell you our reaction.


One more question, since some of you are willing to help a newbie out. I've been divorced for a while. My boyfriend passed away this past year. I'm concerned about sharing that with matches, if any of them would respond. Do people ask early on why your looking, or what your circumstances are? Can I wait a long time to share that info? Or should it come out sooner? Thanks for your advice in this area.

Usually, when this is asked the person is a widow.

Although some people here have a strong negative attitude toward widows (interestingly, they are also the least experienced), I tend toward a favorable view.

I would not include in the profile the divorce, or the death of your partner. If a match askes, you can use it as a way to shut off the pointless inquiery (or open it, as you prefer.)

A death is not a failed relationship. Subtle choice of words is all you need to point out to poeple that they hav failed when you have not; choose your turf.


***

The one thing I am most passionate about:
I enjoy camping and some travel around the state. I contribute time to environmental issues. I am committed to helping others and doing my part. I am passionate about family, friends, a nice home and nature. I believe in love.

I would like to see one theme, and not a list.

This seems to have an overall outdoors idea; if that is what you like, I'd go with that, and relocate the unrelated ideas to elsewhere in your profile.

Expand on the camping (how long, where, why, what level of comfort ...)


The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
I am looking for loving companionship. I want a good, sweet man to spend time with, taking care of our lives together - shopping, chores, errands, home repairs, yard work, car rides, the beach, camping, checking new stuff out, flea markets. Not a big life, but a good one. I'm not sure all of this is a quality, but it's what I want. A life companion to work and play with. I'm fun to spend time with and easy to get along with. Really....

Although again a list, and not a fun, sexy answer (this is dating we are talking about), this answer is solid and free from baggage.

I don't like lists, but this is one of the better lists I have read.


The most influential person in my life has been:
I've had a variety of people throughout my life who have each influenced me at different times for different reasons. I moved a lot in my younger years and didn't have a long term influencer. My dad really was the best. He set a good example in so many ways and I learned so much about life from him. I was raised in the military until college and my Dad taught me to follow rules, represent yourself well, earn a good reputation and do things for others when you are able to.

I thought this question was "other than your parents?"

Still, I care more how intelligent the answer is than whether she obeys (I'll manage teaching her that ...)

At 55 though, I don't want to read something from 40 years ago. Tell me somthing germane.


The three things which I am most thankful for:
I am most thankful for friends that support and encourage me as we spend time together.

This answer is troublesome, as it suggests a lack of personal acheivement / self-motivation. It's subtle, and probably not something the average person would notice.


I am thankful for time spent with friends and family before they are gone. I am very aware of the fragility of life.

A bit downer. I'm okay with it, but I think a happier answer is better.


I am thankful for the outdoors. Beauty to look at and places to feel peace.

Although I commented specifically above, I think these are good answers.


Three of my best life-skills are:
Being a good friend and companion
Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things
Managing my finances

The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:
This is hard to answer. Nothing really I would want someone to notice. But if I have to share something, I would say it more like this....It takes time to know and trust people. Time to learn whose judgment to trust in. I would like people to know sooner that I can be trusted, have good judgment and I have had a wide variety of healthy life experiences to draw upon.

Skip the part about why you're not answering the question.

I don't understand the rest of the answer, but not problem.


The things I can't live without are:
Coffee-quiet time in the morning
Cell phone to keep information at my fingertips
Good friends that are really family
Family - my daughter, my parents (is that 3?)
My Jeep, if it's not in the shop...

The first thing people notice about me:
Often, people comment that I ask a lot of questions. I try to listen well to people and I want to understand and feel their story. I like to tell short personal stories and I enjoy hearing others as well.

An unusual, interesting answer.


Some additional information I want you to know:
I'm new to e-harmony and somewhat new to dating again. A little shy about all of this... I enjoy camping and I have a nice little camper. I have a camping spot close to where I live, so it's easy to go down to the river for dinner, an evening or a weekend. I also have a beautiful moose head in my living room. That must tell you something about me...?

Very unusual. I'd skip the "I enjoy camping ..." sentance, and instead add more detail. I think you should skip the "I'm new ..." tripe, though it sounds a lot less fake here than it usually does.

This sounds like it could appeal a lot to a Marine ???


I typically spend my leisure time:
Camping, antique hunting and yard sales. I thrive with a little time outdoors by water. I enjoy looking at property for sale. I have family in the northern UP, so a few trips up there each year are fun. I enjoy cooking and working on home improvement projects.

The last book I read and enjoyed:
I read a lot for my job, so most of my outside reading seems to be the "how to do anything better" type. No novels for awhile. I did just read "Money Secrets of the Amish" written by a local author. It's about, well....money secrets of the Amish. How they find contentment with simple needs and hard work.

My friends describe me as:
Genuine
Caring
Intelligent
Hard Working
　
Thank you!!!
　

Thank you for any insight you can provide. I don't hear from many men at all, considering we are pre-matched. We must have a lot of similar traits and interests, but no interest on their part.

I am concerned that a lot of my matches play golf or ride motorcycles. Two things I have no interest in. I'm wondering if because so much of my profile has outdoor interests, that's what's matching me with them.

I have uploaded five pictures of just myself. I think they're good, my friends think they're good. I look young for my age. Could that be a problem?

One more question, since some of you are willing to help a newbie out. I've been divorced for a while. My boyfriend passed away this past year. I'm concerned about sharing that with matches, if any of them would respond.

Do people ask early on why your looking, or what your circumstances are? Can I wait a long time to share that info? Or should it come out sooner? Thanks for your advice in this area.

Your profile gives me the overall impression of a somewhat sad, fragile, wistful, woman. I think it is good for a woman to communicate a bit of fragility, which contributes to a quality of femininity. My own profile and personality is often missing enough of that, I think. But your profile seems lacking in a balancing sense of vitality and life energy. These are important in themselves, but also create a sense of something to underly libido and passion.

Some of this fragility might be good, but perhaps not quite so much? You write well for this kind of thing, have number of lively interests and I think with a bit of attention to writing specifics about the positives you can have a great profile.

The one thing I am most passionate about:

I enjoy camping and some travel around the state. I contribute time to environmental issues. I am committed to helping others and doing my part. I am passionate about family, friends, a nice home and nature. I believe in love.

"I believe in love." Don't we all? Isn't this why we're on a dating site? When you say it explicitly here, to me it implies the opposite, that you're not quite sure, can't quite take it for granted, and have a romantic dream and fantasy about it. I also might not lead with camping, unless it really is a big passion of yours. This section sounds a bit blah and might be made more specific.

The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:

I am looking for loving companionship. I want a good, sweet man to spend time with, taking care of our lives together - shopping, chores, errands, home repairs, yard work, car rides, the beach, camping, checking new stuff out, flea markets. Not a big life, but a good one. I'm not sure all of this is a quality, but it's what I want. [COLOR="rgb(255, 0, 255)"]A life companion to work and play with. I'm fun to spend time with and easy to get along with. Really....[/COLOR]
　
This is close to being great, but again, there's no 'life blood' in it. It all feels rather sweet and a bit neutered. The highlighted words are what bother me most. I'd find another way to restate the last sentence. Give an example and don't rely on 'really' to convince.

Basic Information

Occupation:
Finance Manager for an elementary school
Age
55
Height
5' 5"
Wants Kids:
No
Kids at Home:
Yes

The most influential person in my life has been:
I've had a variety of people throughout my life who have each influenced me at different times for different reasons. I moved a lot in my younger years and didn't have a long term influencer. My dad really was the best. He set a good example in so many ways and I learned so much about life from him. I was raised in the military until college and my Dad taught me to follow rules, represent yourself well, earn a good reputation and do things for others when you are able to.

You're 55, old enough to be a rule maker, not an obedient rule follower. This sounds to me a bit like you're still looking for a Daddy, which together with the neutered sweet man of the preceding paragraph is a bit much. Perhaps instead of 'follow rules' something like 'be self disciplined' and 'earn a good reputation' could go.

The three things which I am most thankful for:
I am most thankful for friends that support and encourage me as we spend time together.

Support and encourage - another image of fragility. Can you say anything here related to fun or love or something that suggests you are an active member of the relationship

I am thankful for time spent with friends and family before they are gone. I am very aware of the fragility of life.

Very evocative of pain, bereavement, and ongoing vulnerability. Also friends was just said, so to express vulnerability and lack of faith and strength in two places sounds like you aren't done grieving something, even though you haven't mentioned your boyfriend's death. In a more positive sense, do you mean something like: I'm thankful for each moment of grace and joy that I experience in the small moments of the day.

I am thankful for the outdoors. Beauty to look at and places to feel peace.

Three of my best life-skills are:
Being a good friend and companion
Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things
Managing my finances

The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:
This is hard to answer. Nothing really I would want someone to notice. But if I have to share something, I would say it more like this....It takes time to know and trust people. Time to learn whose judgment to trust in. I would like people to know sooner that I can be trusted, have good judgment and I have had a wide variety of healthy life experiences to draw upon.

Those sentences just reinforce the sense that others see you as fragile, without strengths. Since you were trying to say earlier that you can be fun, perhaps you can use this section to demonstrate a bit of the fun side of you instead.

The things I can't live without are:
Coffee-quiet time in the morning
Cell phone to keep information at my fingertips
Good friends that are really family
Family - my daughter, my parents (is that 3?)
My Jeep, if it's not in the shop...



The first thing people notice about me:
Often, people comment that I ask a lot of questions. I try to listen well to people and I want to understand and feel their story. I like to tell short personal stories and I enjoy hearing others as well.

Good


Some additional information I want you to know:
I'm new to e-harmony and somewhat new to dating again. A little shy about all of this... I enjoy camping and I have a nice little camper. I have a camping spot close to where I live, so it's easy to go down to the river for dinner, an evening or a weekend. I also have a beautiful moose head in my living room. That must tell you something about me...?

I'd get rid of the highlighted first two sentence. They only communicate insecurity, nothing positive. Don't lead with your anxiety. This isn't the place to show it.

I typically spend my leisure time:
Camping, antique hunting and yard sales. I thrive with a little time outdoors by water. I enjoy looking at property for sale. I have family in the northern UP, so a few trips up there each year are fun. I enjoy cooking and working on home improvement projects.

Nice

The last book I read and enjoyed:
I read a lot for my job, so most of my outside reading seems to be the "how to do anything better" type. No novels for awhile. I did just read "Money Secrets of the Amish" written by a local author. It's about, well....money secrets of the Amish. How they find contentment with simple needs and hard work.


Nice

]

Overall a pretty good profile ,well written and interesting. Keep in mind you are trying to attract new men into your life...an a bit of open mindedness could go along way.

There is a sense of instant boyfriend /husband replacement here. He's not allowed to have his own interests...but must like your moose on the wall and drive your camper around?
The bit about handy man and chores screams of "I am desperate to have a man around the house"... anyone who will fix things and drive me around will do.

Rethink and reword this a bit to allow a new presence in your life rather than an ad to replace a boyfriend /husband and his exact interests and functions.

Open your mind, your world and your wording a bit and you'll do fine...Good Luck