MsSoanso is offline MsSoanso Post #1  December 28,2011, 8:54am
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burn the evidence
Last edited by MsSoanso; December 28,2011 at 12:44pm. Reason: delete it-no evidence
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #2  December 28,2011, 9:25am
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I'm not sure if you are trying to be off-beat? sarcastic? funny? I am sure very few men will want to communicate with a women who seems to go out of her way to be so off-putting. With some rethinking /rewording you could have a clever and attractive profile

Try writing a bit more sincere profile, with some actual humor in it rather than all the cynical, bitter negativity...dressed up as "eclectic".
If you are creative , you can use each section /question to highlight a different aspect of yourself / your lifestyle / tastes. Make sure you have good quality recent face and full length pics...Good Luck
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #3  December 28,2011, 11:32am
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MsSoanso wrote :
Bored people are boring! I am always looking to fill my head with goodness and to keep myself amused. I jump into discussions on pop culture and music in hopes to dredge up further nuggets.(Can't believe I just said that)So, yeah. looking for new(to me)and interesting subjects/material to add to my repertoire.
The first sentence is already off-putting. What I get from this bit is that you have no passions but want a guy with enough passions (about whatever) to keep you entertained. I, like most healthy men with passions and something to offer, am looking for a women with passions and something to offer. I'm already turned off and we're only one paragraph in.

wrote :
Hard to narrow, but my relationship has to be based on friendship. I'm loyal,considerate, understanding, and I expect for my friends to operate at the same level. A man who is secure with himself and over his own and mostly everyone else's BS enough to relax is attractive. Similar romantic inclinations and expectations, confident/skillful demonstrations of storytelling and sing-dancing, an appreciation for sarcasm and willingness to risk looking like a horse's ass for a laugh all win major points in my book.
"Confident/skillful demonstrations of storytelling and sing-dancing... willingness to risk looking lik a horse's ass for a laugh" -- Again, I'm getting a woman with little to offer who wants a guy to entertain her. I'd only continue reading if you were *really* hot and thought I could score a sexual fling out of it.

wrote :
Smokes:Several times a week
Ouch!

wrote :
My closest friend,(friend of the family since attending middle school with my mother)Scot's abilility to read people and draw on past experiences has helped me face some of the various crises of living. His influence is obvious in many aspects of my character. My taste in entertainment, my mode of partying,(and yes these do count-You are what you like AND dislike)making friendships and family a priority, keeping a realistic yet hopeful attitude on life and my love of mondegreens are all evidence of experiences I've shared with him and the rest of my tribe.
Spelling and grammar mistakes.

wrote :
Say something funny, do something cool, I'll laugh, I'll smile. I'm willing to talk to just about anyone.
Again, "Entertain me!"
wrote :
We all have the straight face/husky voice combo, that can be offputting.
There goes, "to pull this off you'd have to be ridiculously hot!"

wrote :
If I keep typing, I'll run out of charm for our date..
This was your idea of charm?!

wrote :
sneaking condiments into my handbag, extended bathroom breaks, jumping into strangers' private conversations, binge-drinking and offbeat dancing. Most likely binge-drinking.
Anyone looking for a long-term partner probably gave up long ago.

wrote :
Wow, I never realized how boring I am
I'll stop here. We have a boring, off-putting, smoking, binge-drinker who wants men to entertain her (in your own words). If you want a hook-up, you'll probably do better on another site like Craigslist or Match.com where you reveal less of yourself. If you want a healthy long-term relationship, you're going to need to offer at least as good as you get. If you have skills, achievements, and positive qualities you ain't putting in your profile, don't hold back! Put them in. I'm sure you have at least some positive qualities to offer. Ask your best friend if you can't think of any. If you earnestly don't have much to offer, you may want to work on self-improvement. Smoking and binge-drinking are turn-offs to many successful men and will shorten your lifespan. Good luck!
Last edited by shapeShifter79; December 28,2011 at 11:35am.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #4  December 28,2011, 11:35am
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I'm not your audience, but the way this came across to me is a bored, boring, bitter person trying really hard to pretend to be cool and eclectic and desperately seeking for someone to bring some actual cool factor into her life....except it's not working...... Please don't take this comment personally as I don't actually know you and I'm only telling you how your profile as a whole is reading to a complete stranger.

The passionate about section - delete and start over from scratch. Your opening sentence is a negative attack on people and even the most charismatic person will find that off putting. There is no need to put anyone down in your profile ever. In general you want to stay away from negative comments, both about yourself and others. It will just make you seem bitter and jaded.

What you are looking for in a person can really be summed up in one word - a clown. It's also peppered with negative comments. Really doesn't come across well and needs to be reworded. You can say what you have in mind, but you can do it in a nicer manner.

The way your influential person section is worded is kind of odd. I'm not sure if he is kind of a father figure to you or if you have a crush on him.

If you are willing to talk to just about anyone, people WILL notice that instantly. Rethink what the question is asking here.

In some additional info section, I think you were going for humor except that it needs work in wording. It's kind of like you are trying to be funny and outrageous but you really didn't go far enough in that or something and so it comes across as a bit bitter toward other women who might be doing these things and yet are more successful than you when it comes to relationships.

Your leisure activities....after all that venting comes the truth - you are just a homebody who reads books as opposed to going out and doing all that outrageous eclectic stuff you ranted about in passionate about section. Well....that's how this reads anyway.

I think you need to scrap the whole thing pretty much and start over.....
Last edited by DancingFool; December 28,2011 at 11:51am.
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #5  December 28,2011, 11:39am
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DancingFool wrote :
What you are looking for in a person can really be summed up in one word - a clown.
+1 - You're much better at cutting to the chase!
 
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MsSoanso is offline MsSoanso Post #6  December 28,2011, 12:33pm
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Wow. So every joke is taken seriously even after I mention sarcasm. OK! Thanks-deleting most of it now. (there had been more to it explaining certain things that didn't make sense, but I had worried it would get too wordy) But thanks for pointing out the insincerity and negtivity toward others.
Back to BLAND!
Last edited by MsSoanso; December 28,2011 at 12:42pm.
 
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MsSoanso is offline MsSoanso Post #7  December 28,2011, 12:48pm
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Where are my spelling and grammar mistakes in my influence answer? I see that it needs some rewording, but this is one of the only parts I was okay with.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #8  December 28,2011, 1:11pm
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The problem with sarcasm is that it depends on your tone of voice, face expression, body language and timing. When people are reading something, they have none of that to clue them in that you are being sarcastic. Not even every skilled professional writer can pull off writing something sarcastic and getting it across to the audience as such.

You don't have to be bland at all. I would suggest perusing some of the older threads from other people asking for advice about their profile. Some people have done a fantastic job of including humor or interesting remarks in their profile that makes it stand out. See if you can get some ideas from them and try again.
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #9  December 28,2011, 1:26pm
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MsSoanso wrote :
Where are my spelling and grammar mistakes in my influence answer? I see that it needs some rewording, but this is one of the only parts I was okay with.
Instead of editing your writings, I'll suggest plugging them into Microsoft Word or your favorite spelling and grammar checker. Any worth its salt will spot at least one error. Each match has their own tolerance for mistakes. Just do your personal best.
 
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MsSoanso is offline MsSoanso Post #10  December 28,2011, 2:36pm
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Again. Where? In my reply to you, which is obviously casual? You really are THE Know-it-all, aren't you? Do you see any differences in your replies to my post vs the others? At least it occured to them that some attempt at sarcasm or wackiness was involved in that last paragraph, however futile that attempt was-it's pretty obvious. So you seriously think that I would brag about binge-drinking to get dates and you call me on my spelling and grammar, but cop out when I ask for help. Thank you for reminding me that the oblivious ones are the worst.
 
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