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Jezebel Jezebel is offline
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Ooh. I really HATE the "dinner" question. I suppose it's because my boss uses that one for job interviews. (Luckily I was hired before the 4-page questionnaires started...) I didn't ask many custom questions, but I was never quite able to give a canned answer... I really like this:


now that I've answered your questions, and you've read my Must Haves/Can't Stands, is there anything that you find alarming or that you have questions about?


Sometimes my "must haves" were misunderstood....
- December 19th, 2008, 11:18 pm
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Bluecondor Bluecondor is offline
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There are some good suggestions here.


I read an article on the BBC website on a research study on the link between personality and the music a person likes. Based on this, I asked the following simple second question:





"What music (other than Christmas music) is in your car or stereo right now?"





In a similar vein, I liked this question as well (which I found on-line):





"Complete the statement: “I recommend…” (it can be a show, movie, book, restaurant, website, activity, etc.)"





I like both of these questions, because the way the person answers it will tell you something about their personality and what they enjoy in life.
- December 25th, 2008, 09:37 pm
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Kerilee Kerilee is offline
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michaell1999, wrote :

For the second questions I always send custom questions, never from the eharmony list.

My matches seem to enjoy the questions. Some say they are thought provoking.

A few close after I send the questions. I guess if my questions are too difficult to answer then they should close


One of my favorite questions is "You can invite 4 people (throughout history) to dinner. Who and Why?"


Do you have any favorite second questions (not on the eharmony list) ?

Hi. i have a few questions that I like to use such as, " Describe a crisis and how you handled it." Another one is, " If you were to pick an animal that describes your personality, which one would you pick and why?" I like to pick questions that provoke thought.





What are some other questions that you have used?
- December 31st, 2008, 06:12 am
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tsintexas tsintexas is offline
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michaell1999, wrote :

For the second questions I always send custom questions, never from the eharmony list.

My matches seem to enjoy the questions. Some say they are thought provoking.

A few close after I send the questions. I guess if my questions are too difficult to answer then they should close


One of my favorite questions is "You can invite 4 people (throughout history) to dinner. Who and Why?"


Do you have any favorite second questions (not on the eharmony list) ?

I love the history thing......I'll have to use that one..
- January 1st, 2009, 04:34 pm
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ice_in_ur_shorts ice_in_ur_shorts is offline
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GattacaFox wrote :

JMWTurnerFan wrote :
GattacaFox wrote :


I'm still kind of getting use to this whole online dating thing, but I recently had a match close on me after I sent her the following questions...


If you could be stranded anywhere in the world for a month with another person, where would it be and who would you feel the most comfortable with; the most uncomfortable?


What do you find yourself being the most curious about in life or the world? For instance, something that you heard about and you just had to know more until you felt satisfied that your curiosity no longer ailed you?


They say life is about simple pleasures, what is your simplest pleasure, and how does it make you feel?


I though they were pretty straight forward, but apparently I had offended her or something; are these questions really that offensive, or are they just weird?


Good idea. However, the first question asks the responder to think about things that make them uncomfortable. Probably not a good first question to be asking. It's subtle, but you don't want someone to associate you with feelings of uncomfortableness. If you were in person this would be easy to avoid via body language, physical chemistry, etc.: you could see if the person were open to such questions, etc., and respond encouragingly. Online it's more dangerous. The other two are good, although a lot of people might find the second question difficult, and if so, that won't help you out. I like it, though.




AHHH, Thanks JMWTurnerFan! That makes reasonable sense.I never though about the ‘uncomfortable’ part in relation to them associating the question back to me. Thanks for the great advice. I will definitely keep that in mind.


Question #3 - nix that one! Sounds like you are asking about sex. Not yet, stud!
- January 2nd, 2009, 05:15 pm
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JerseyGirl wrote :

Red Sox Girl wrote :
Pam_S52 wrote :


This is a great topic..thanks for all of the good ideas. I like them all. The next match I get that replies to my profile I will have to ask them some of these questions..all are great..


I wish some of the people that answer this discussion board would be sent to me as a match! I have gotten more response talking on this part of eHarmony than on my actuall matches!


You all take care.....Pam




I agree Pam! Maybe we should make our own sub-committee for matching ourselves up with people here!
I suggested this on another topic. I think we should do it!
You're gonna find that the more you participate here on eHA that you will MAKE some incredible hookups. And that is much better than just FINDING them.
- January 2nd, 2009, 05:32 pm
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Imagine you are the perfect guy. You have enough money, health, social contact; you can fix stuff and lift heavy objects. Here's 3 questions for you:


1) In one word or less, why would you want a woman in your life?


2) Now, you, being a woman, and assuming there was a man that was willing and reasonably able to accomodate your needs for security, perhaps admiration, etc, just how willing would you be to fulfill the role that he needs?


3) What would he have to do or be to accomodate your needs, and keep you selflessly interested in him?
- January 2nd, 2009, 05:48 pm
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ice_in_ur_shorts ice_in_ur_shorts is offline
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What would make you "turn and run" from a relationship?
- January 2nd, 2009, 05:50 pm
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johub johub is offline
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I'm new at online dating. I think I'm having trouble meeting someone because I am a 63 year old woman. Men aren't looking for 63 year old women! However, I am often mistaken for my daughter's sister, and my friends are astounded when I tell them my age. I work out 3/week and ran a 5K in September. I am a professional and widowed. Any advice?
- January 3rd, 2009, 04:30 pm
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Shabba_Labba_Ding_Dong Shabba_Labba_Ding_Dong is offline
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WOW! I wish I would have read some of these posts earlier. I am so new to the dating scene I guess I played it safe and have been using the canned questions. I thought a lot of the ideas and questions that others have posted or enjoyed getting themselves, were great. I will be putting a little more thought into my own questions that I ask, as well asanswer. Some were so original I wouldn't have thought of them as first questions; sure they would have been asked eventually at some point in conversation but why wait to discover the fun side of someone?


Thanks to everyone for all the enlightening ideas.
- January 7th, 2009, 07:47 pm
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