Profile Review (Female, 39)


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Leeranii is offline Leeranii Post #1  August 9,2011, 5:03pm
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I would greatly appreciate a review of my profile.. either it's boring or I'm ugly and just need to call it a day. .

Anyway.. discouraged and not just from eH. Here's the profile - thank you in advance for your time!
****





The one thing I am most passionate about: Genealogy, writing, fashion, movies, forensics. Children's rights, safety. Doing the right thing. Challenging myself.





The most important thing I am looking for in a person is: We have to match, both personally and emotionally.





Basic Information

Occupation: admin, government Age 39 Height 5' 6" Wants Kids: No Kids at Home: Yes
Ethnicity White, non-Hispanic Religion: Neither religious nor spiritual Drinks: A few times a year Smokes: Never

In my own words

The most influential person in my life has been:

A former boss has been one of the most influential; she's always been a cool head of reason and someone I could bounce ideas off of.


The three things which I am most thankful for:

  • Definitely my job, I really enjoy my coworkers.
  • My son-he's an awesome kid who is smart and patient.
  • For being able to go back to school. One day at time but I'm getting there!

Three of my best life-skills are:

  • Using humor to make friends laugh
  • Helping those who are less fortunate or in need
  • Continuing to expand my knowledge and awareness


The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:

My personality.


The things I can't live without are:

  • My computer
  • Work!
  • Laughter
  • Sleep


The first thing people notice about me:

Probably my laugh or my glasses.


Some additional information I want you to know:

I haven't dated in a long, long time and I'm worried that will turn people off.


My interests

I typically spend my leisure time:

Seeing a movie, writing or getting out and about. Antiques, craft shows, museums, the beach, you name it.

The last book I read and enjoyed:

Actually, it was a story written by a friend. She's an awesome writer and puts words on a page in such a way that I see each and every single thing.


According to my friends:

My friends describe me as:

  • Genuine
  • Optimistic
  • Passionate
  • Outgoing
 
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themicrochip is offline themicrochip Post #2  August 9,2011, 9:25pm
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Not bad, but there are a few red flags and a few items for consideration.

You say your personality is what you want people to notice about you. What about your personality? Why isn't it noticed? What's so good about it? What's it like? Why should people take notice of it?

Most important thing you're looking for. Of course you want to match. But what specifically would you like to see, what trait would you like him to have? What do you want or need?

Finally, and this is the biggest item....a total red flag: what you're most passionate about. #1, Choose one item and expand on it. #2, Write in a complete sentence. I know for over 90% of guys, they see something like this and it's an instant red flag because you don't write like that in the rest of the profile and you can't choose one thing.
 
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tangochef is offline tangochef Post #3  August 9,2011, 11:55pm
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"Some additional information I want you to know:
I haven't dated in a long, long time and I'm worried that will turn people off.
"

This is a negative (shows lack of confidence). You do not want to mention negatives in a profile.
 
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FrankTheGreat is offline FrankTheGreat Post #4  August 10,2011, 10:15am
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It's bland. There's absolutely nothing there that I wouldn't have read in someone else's profile. If your profile is the same as everyone else's, you're inviting guys to make a judgment on you based on only your photos. And fromr you OP, you don't sound that confident about your pics.

This morning, I sent a GC to a woman who didn't post a photo. All I had to judge her on was her profile. But in it, she talked about having some tattoos, some of which are visible. She also said she was a geek, but she was okay with that. And she talked about how much she likes hugs and how all her friends know they're going to get hugged anytime they see her.

All very different and instantly made her attractive to me, sight unseen. Don't be vanilla. Make sure people will remember you. Tell us what makes you the person you are?
 
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FrankTheGreat is offline FrankTheGreat Post #5  August 10,2011, 10:20am
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Oh, and I sent another GC to another woman (she had pictures, though, and was pretty) simply because of one line in her profile:

"The first thing people notice about me:

I think flats are for quitters."

Hilarious. It was good-natured, funny, and probably indicates that she's a girly-girl, which I like.
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #6  August 10,2011, 10:54am
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Leeranii wrote :
The one thing I am most passionate about: Genealogy, writing, fashion, movies, forensics. Children's rights, safety. Doing the right thing. Challenging myself.
Try to pick one and expand on that. Such as "Challenging myself". How? What kind of success have you had? What else would you like to do in the future?

wrote :
The most important thing I am looking for in a person is: We have to match, both personally and emotionally.
Meaning? Match how? What kind of traits should he have to "match" with you? What are you even like? How is your match supposed to get an idea if you would "match" if he doesn't know what he is supposed to "match"?

wrote :
The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:
My personality.
Do you have one? What is it like? Are you smart, funny, witty, kind, loud, softspoken, daring, silly... ? Don't tell me, show me!

wrote :
The first thing people notice about me:
Probably my laugh or my glasses.
Go with the laugh. Describe it. Is it infectious? Flirtatious? A loud guffaw? A snicker?
Leave off the glasses. If you wear glasses, and that's what people notice, then you're probably wearing them in your profile pics. No need to mention it in that case.


wrote :
Some additional information I want you to know:
I haven't dated in a long, long time and I'm worried that will turn people off.
Kiss of death. This makes you sound totally non-serious, like you might be a time waster with no idea what you are doing, and reluctant to meet people in person. Is this your first foray into online dating? Don't state that on your profile, either.

wrote :
I typically spend my leisure time:
Seeing a movie, writing or getting out and about. Antiques, craft shows, museums, the beach, you name it.
"Out and about" doing what? Tell more about this. This could be anything. You need to give your matches some idea of what they might be doing "out and about" with you.

wrote :
The last book I read and enjoyed:
Actually, it was a story written by a friend. She's an awesome writer and puts words on a page in such a way that I see each and every single thing.
I like this. It's different. But what was the story about? What did you like about it? It doesn't matter what your choice is, but why you chose it.

***********************************

I am not a guy, but I am a woman about your age. Right now, your profile doesn't say much. You need to expand on a lot of ideas. You have a lot of "lists" but I still have no idea who you are. Why would I want to date you?
 
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HelenDanger is offline HelenDanger Post #7  August 10,2011, 1:06pm
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Leeranii wrote :
...


The one thing I am most passionate about: Genealogy, writing, fashion, movies, forensics. Children's rights, safety. Doing the right thing. Challenging myself.

Pick one and then go off about it. Shows at the very least you pay attention to detail and can follow directions. lol



The most important thing I am looking for in a person is: We have to match, both personally and emotionally.

This isn't saying much. What unusual trait really does it for you? That he's a great driver? That he knows how to read maps? That he can read a story out loud and do all the voices? Get specific so that a guy can imagine doing whatever in your presence and you being all happy and delighted by him.



Basic Information

Occupation: admin, government Age 39 Height 5' 6" Wants Kids: No Kids at Home: Yes
Ethnicity White, non-Hispanic Religion: Neither religious nor spiritual Drinks: A few times a year Smokes: Never

In my own words

The most influential person in my life has been:

A former boss has been one of the most influential; she's always been a cool head of reason and someone I could bounce ideas off of.
Too vague. And a family member or teacher is the most classic response. The other option is some off the wall person you admire, such as the bagger at your grocery store because he's so patient with everyone etc.

The three things which I am most thankful for:

  • Definitely my job, I really enjoy my coworkers.
  • My son-he's an awesome kid who is smart and patient.
  • For being able to go back to school. One day at time but I'm getting there!
Makes you sound a leeeeetle bit like a workaholic. And I'd put health or family in there. And or something silly like peanutbutter milkshakes.
Three of my best life-skills are:

  • Using humor to make friends laugh
  • Helping those who are less fortunate or in need
  • Continuing to expand my knowledge and awareness
Like these!

The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:

My personality.
Okay this sounds really bad, even though I know what you mean. It sounds like you think people don't notice that you even have a personality. Yipes! I'd add an odd talent in here. Like the ability to tie a maraschino cherry stem in a knot with your tongue. Or juggling. Or wiggling your ears. Make yourself sound like you'd be entertaining on a date.

The things I can't live without are:

  • My computer
  • Work!
  • Laughter
  • Sleep
Nooooooooo! lol Not work again! Don't take this list so literally. You don't want to seem like a nerd who doesn't get out much, because I know that's not you. But this could be interpreted that way. Get whimsical and silly with this.

The first thing people notice about me:

Probably my laugh or my glasses.
Good. But choose one. And then describe it. What does your laugh sound like. Or what is so interesting about your glasses?

Some additional information I want you to know:

I haven't dated in a long, long time and I'm worried that will turn people off.
NO. Absolutely not. Better to have nothing here than show your worries. You could put that you want to take things slowly or something. But no self doubt allowed at all, okay?

My interests

I typically spend my leisure time:

Seeing a movie, writing or getting out and about. Antiques, craft shows, museums, the beach, you name it.
More detail about why you're so fun to go and do these things with. Make him want to join you because you'd have such a great time. Pretend you're trying to persuade a friend to go do one of them with you.
The last book I read and enjoyed:

Actually, it was a story written by a friend. She's an awesome writer and puts words on a page in such a way that I see each and every single thing.
Perfect wonderful awesome!

According to my friends:

My friends describe me as:

  • Genuine
  • Optimistic
  • Passionate
  • Outgoing
Maybe add one surprising feature your friends notice about you. Ask them for a cute quirk and include it.

Nice stuff! But I think you're dead on that it could come across a bit generic. Just add some juicy detail and emphasize your life outside of work and you've got a winner. You sound really nice. Just gotta maybe try to be a little sexy and alluring too.
 
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FrankTheGreat is offline FrankTheGreat Post #8  August 10,2011, 1:50pm
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On the I-haven't-dated-in-a-long-time thing, most everyone is coming out against it, and they're probably right to do so. It's going to turn a lot of people off.

But it doesn't have that effect on me.

If nothing else, that was probably the most unique part of this profile and I'm going to remember it. And it doesn't come across as weak and self-doubting to me. It seems honest and vulnerable. Both positives in my mind.

I'm in the vast minority on this (can a minority be vast?), I recognize. And it doesn't necessarily make you MORE attractive to me. But it sets you apart, and that's not unattractive to me. You're not afraid to just state what your insecurities are. It shows a good amount of self-awareness.

I'd still take it out, but my point is, it's not so universally awful.
 
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Leeranii is offline Leeranii Post #9  August 10,2011, 2:01pm
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WOW - I was not expecting this response...seriously, this has made my day! Thank you all! I'm going to work on my profile and repost it to see what y'all think.
 
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Leeranii is offline Leeranii Post #10  August 10,2011, 3:28pm
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Thank you to everyone who responded. I've taken your suggestions and hopefully come up with something a little more snazzy. This is Part 1, the rest is in the next reply. Please let me know what you think:

One of the things I'm most passionate about is writing. I love to write, mostly sci-fi (military sci-fi, cyberpunk, steampunk, RPG's, contemporary) or fantasy (sword & sorcery, magicks). I've been writing since I was 15 and only in the last several years have decided that one of my goals is to be published. Wish me luck!

The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
The most important quality is honloyove....? Honesty-loyalty-love? Honest, loving loyalty? Ok, I'll narrow it down: passion about life, the universe and everything in it. (Except skunks - I don't care if you're not passionate about them) (No, really, it's okay) Oh and a sexy accent wouldn't hurt (but it's not required).

Basic Information
Occupation: Government
Age 39
Height 5' 6"
Wants Kids: No
Kids at Home: Yes
Ethnicity: White, non-Hispanic
Religion: Neither religious nor spiritual
Drinks: A few times a year
Smokes: Never

In my own words
The most influential person in my life has been:
My best friend, Pam. She's such a strong person and she has always encouraged me and she's not afraid to bring my Inner Fairy Princess down a notch.

The three things which I am most thankful for:
  • My son-he's an awesome kid who is smart and patient.
  • Red Hots
  • For being able to go back to school. One day at time but I'm getting there!
Three of my best life-skills are:
  • Using humor to make friends laugh
  • Helping those who are less fortunate or in need
  • Continuing to expand my knowledge and awareness

 
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