matches outside of preferences


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shinko is offline shinko Post #1  July 24,2011, 12:17am
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Why do I keep receiving matches outside my preferences? This is not the first time it has happened. It has been happening for the past week! I have also complained about this before. For instance, of the the 7 matches that I had received today, 3 were out of my distance preference, 2 were not my preference for ethnicity, and 1 was out of my age preference range. What is going on? Just to be clear, these were never labeled as flex matches. Besides, these preferences for age, ethnicity, and distance are all set to '7' or 'very important'.

This is all very suspicious as last week I was getting good matches right before my subscription was about to expire and now that I have renewed, I am getting these horrible matches. I am really fed up with eHarmony's matching process with its useless preferences settings. eHarmony needs to hold up their end and respect their customers' preferences and their own claims and terms. If not, give us a refund. I know that won't happen but I am considering filing a complaint with the Better Business Bureau if nothing is done.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #2  July 24,2011, 2:25am
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shinko wrote :
Why do I keep receiving matches outside my preferences? This is not the first time it has happened. It has been happening for the past week! I have also complained about this before. For instance, of the the 7 matches that I had received today, 3 were out of my distance preference, 2 were not my preference for ethnicity, and 1 was out of my age preference range. What is going on? Just to be clear, these were never labeled as flex matches. Besides, these preferences for age, ethnicity, and distance are all set to '7' or 'very important'.

This is all very suspicious as last week I was getting good matches right before my subscription was about to expire and now that I have renewed, I am getting these horrible matches. I am really fed up with eHarmony's matching process with its useless preferences settings. eHarmony needs to hold up their end and respect their customers' preferences and their own claims and terms. If not, give us a refund. I know that won't happen but I am considering filing a complaint with the Better Business Bureau if nothing is done.
Why would you complain to the BBB? Have you exhausted all of your options such as contacting Customer Care and asking them to help you properly adjust your settings to cater to your preferences?

Secondly, why on earth would you call these men horrible matches? You come off as being very prejudiced. If you really dislike certain people based on matters they can't control then that is your perogative, but it doesn't put you in a favorable light. Smh

B.Y.
 
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shinko is offline shinko Post #3  July 24,2011, 3:20am
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BabyYoda wrote :
Why would you complain to the BBB? Have you exhausted all of your options such as contacting Customer Care and asking them to help you properly adjust your settings to cater to your preferences?

Secondly, why on earth would you call these men horrible matches? You come off as being very prejudiced. If you really dislike certain people based on matters they can't control then that is your perogative, but it doesn't put you in a favorable light. Smh

B.Y.
Yes, I have contacted Customer Care; still waiting to hear back from them. They did adjust my setting the last time I called to complain about this very issue. Maybe it's just my profile that is causing this.

I'm in no way calling them horrible people. They are terrible MATCHES insofar as satisfying my preferences. The preferences that anyone of us have a right to have or else eHarmony would not have put them there in the first place. And please don't resort to personal attacks. You do not know me so don't label me as 'prejudiced' for exercising my right to have some say on the kinds of matches I receive.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #4  July 24,2011, 3:44am
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shinko wrote :
Yes, I have contacted Customer Care; still waiting to hear back from them. They did adjust my setting the last time I called to complain about this very issue. Maybe it's just my profile that is causing this.

I'm in no way calling them horrible people. They are terrible MATCHES insofar as satisfying my preferences. The preferences that anyone of us have a right to have or else eHarmony would not have put them there in the first place. And please don't resort to personal attacks. You do not know me so don't label me as 'prejudiced' for exercising my right to have some say on the kinds of matches I receive.
Did you call customer care? Secondly, I commented on your negative attitude towards matches who are people, fyi. You calling them terrible matches which is a pre-judgment based on age, distance and ethnicity constitues prejudice. I found your words to be highly offensive.

Lastly, I don't have to know you to comment on your words. I don't care if you are prejudiced, a racist or whatever. I don't involve myself with people like that anyway. My concern is for those men who were called horrible matches by someone who doesn't know them. How
ironic?

B.Y.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #5  July 24,2011, 4:12am
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shinko wrote :
Why do I keep receiving matches outside my preferences? This is not the first time it has happened. It has been happening for the past week! I have also complained about this before. For instance, of the the 7 matches that I had received today, 3 were out of my distance preference, 2 were not my preference for ethnicity, and 1 was out of my age preference range. What is going on? Just to be clear, these were never labeled as flex matches. Besides, these preferences for age, ethnicity, and distance are all set to '7' or 'very important'.

This is all very suspicious as last week I was getting good matches right before my subscription was about to expire and now that I have renewed, I am getting these horrible matches. I am really fed up with eHarmony's matching process with its useless preferences settings. eHarmony needs to hold up their end and respect their customers' preferences and their own claims and terms. If not, give us a refund. I know that won't happen but I am considering filing a complaint with the Better Business Bureau if nothing is done.
The BBB isn't going to touch this with a ten foot pole, IMO.
You're on a dating site..and there's been no guarantees made, neither implied or inferred..so they'd pretty much laugh at you after you hung up the phone.

What you are most likely are receiving are flex matches which they tell you about when you sign up..there's some wording in there like "Occasionally, you'll receive flex matches and this is our way of...yada yada..."

What it is, is they don't want you to get disgruntled with getting zero matches.. so.. they send you those that may be outside of your preference settings...
My advice is to tighten up your settings so that they don't take too much liberty with this, IOW, if you're somewhat relaxed about what your preferences are, they will send you even more flex matches..at least that's been my experience with EH.
Either way, you've got to take it easy..
And, if you're finding nothing's working after you tighten up settings give them a call...plus, if you've read these boards at all..this isn't the first time their matching software has sucked eggs...their software here is out of whack, more than half the time.
Last edited by TheThinker; July 24,2011 at 4:18am.
 
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shinko is offline shinko Post #6  July 24,2011, 8:03am
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BabyYoda,

By definition, anyone who narrows the scope of preference settings IS prejudging and excluding people based on race, age, distance, and religion, etc. People are prejudiced all the time in dating, (e.g. why do some women insist on dating taller men, and why do some men insist on dating skinnier women?) I'm here asking for help and advice and all you're doing is attacking me for exercising some control on the matches I receive.

TheThinker,

Thanks for the input. I guess I have to chalk it up to the wonky software indeed. As stated in my original post, I've tightened it as much possible, all 7s, which according to their own statements shouldn't even produce any flex matches. As for calling them, the last time I called about the issue, they basically told me the matching software needed time to adjust to the new settings and thus might still spew out 'bad' matches. However, it's been a couple of months now and it's still doing it; I havent touched the settings during that time. It's all very fishy considering last week I had appropriate matches and then after I renewed, BAM, this comes up again. :/
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #7  July 24,2011, 9:10am
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shinko wrote :
BabyYoda,

By definition, anyone who narrows the scope of preference settings IS prejudging and excluding people based on race, age, distance, and religion, etc. People are prejudiced all the time in dating, (e.g. why do some women insist on dating taller men, and why do some men insist on dating skinnier women?) I'm here asking for help and advice and all you're doing is attacking me for exercising some control on the matches I receive.
You really need to re-read what I wrote. I commented on your choice of words to describe people you don't know. That was my issue with your post. It had nothing to do with your preferences. Secondly, I was disturbed by the tone of your post because of your displeasure of receiving matches outside of your preference. To call people horrible matches just because they are of a certain phenotype or may not be able to relate to you socially or live within your parameters was an extreme comment fueled with an idle threat to take eH to the BBB because of your displeasure of your match results.

You are not the only person who receives matches outside one's match preferred settings. It would be one thing if eH ONLY sent you these type of matches and never sent you any "preferred" matches and another thing to be vexed because you had to see a few non desirable matches. The latter takes things to another level. So, as far as I am concerned you contradicted yourself plus you may want to learn what constitutes a personal attack.

In all, don't accuse someone of something he/she did not do. I am not interested in what you find desirable in a match nor undesirable. Do care about you making negative remarks toward innocent individuals for the reasons given previously.

B.Y.
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Renee is offline eH_Advice_Host_Renee Post #8  July 24,2011, 11:40am

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Hi shinko and Everyone,

Glad you got a hold of Customer Care. You should receive a response within 24 hours. If it's longer, you are welcome to PM me with your Singles e-mail address, and I'll be glad to look into what's happening with your inquiry.

While we would like members to consider ALL matches our system finds are compatible with them in important relationship areas, most members will have preferences in some areas such as distance, age, religion. In fact in all my years of viewing member match settings, I can't think of any time that a member has set every preference as broadly as possible.

Whatever a member's preference settings are, we are very happy to honor them. Should a member get flexible matches, even though their importance setting for a given preference(s) is a 6 or above, our Tech team will need to take a look.

I can understand your frustration, shinko, if you feel you continue to get matches outside of your set preferences. While I know you called these matches "horrible," I felt that adjective referred to our matching system and the service eHarmony is providing you and not your matches personally.

So I was glad to see my interpretation was correct when you explained: "They are terrible MATCHES insofar as satisfying my preferences,"

Just a reminder to Everyone that our 1st Community Standard is to treat each other with kindness and respect. If you take issue with another member's comment or choice of words, you are welcome to "discuss" the situation if you can do so without personalizing your own comments.

And, as always, if you are highly offended by a member's remark or feel that they have personally attacked you, per our Standards, you should IGNORE and report the post.

Thanks to everyone for your cooperation.

Renee
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Last edited by eH_Advice_Host_Renee; July 24,2011 at 11:53am.
 
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NBdater is online now NBdater Post #9  July 24,2011, 12:04pm
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I get a few matches outside my most strongly emphasized preferences, usually age and distance related. I find it no big deal and just close them. I have a far greater problem with phantom matches who are nonpaying, nonsubscribing individuals eHarmony probably uses as filler matches. Perhaps some of the actual paying inappropriate matches have received few matches themselves and have complained so in order to satisfy them eH threw in the match with me. Who knows? I just wish closing a match was an easy and quick one step process.
 
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theprincessbride is offline theprincessbride Post #10  July 24,2011, 2:14pm
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I've been with eH for 1.5 years now. Up until about 3 weeks ago, when I retook the personality questionnaire, whenever you set a preference to a "7," the system would honor your choices, and a few times, very few times, it would send you one or two "flex" matches. In the past 3 weeks, I've received 25-50% matches outside of my "7" preferences, and NONE of them were labelled as "flex." As always, my experience with CS has been disconcerting -- they always reply with a lame, canned, and sometimes BS response (sometimes they don't even make the effort to address your issue). If this continues on, I will contact Renee, too! So, I feel your pain.
 
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