Long overdue profile overhaul


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Jennivere is offline Jennivere Post #11  June 30,2011, 11:44am
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GoldSpider wrote :
I agree there an opportunity to be more clear/positive here. Not entirely sure how to put a positive spin, though, on "this-is-me-take-it-or-leave-it and still-hung-up-on-my-ex types need not apply." I've had quite enough of both.
It is probably better to leave that out. You can usually tell by the tone of their profile if they have a lot of baggage.

GoldSpider wrote :
Agree, again, that I can do better with that. Not a big fan of this question; makes it sound like I'm dependent on "things". I'm probably taking it too seriously!
Try listing some fun stuff here then, one of mine is sipping a cinnamon dulce latte (starbucks nut).

GoldSpider wrote :
That's one of my big frustrations in this; I haven't a very good idea of what those things are! I am TERRIBLE at coming up with date ideas.
If you like watching movies, trying listing the genres you like to draw some interest; if you like eating out list types of restaurants or food you like the most. It doesn't have to be a statement of what date night will be.

You other comment on what was getting censored, your comments that we told you to edit are probably the culprits.
 
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Sassafras54 is offline Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #12  June 30,2011, 11:49am
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I like your profile a lot! It's clear, well-written, amusing, has a lot of info in it, friendly and inviting.

The only thing that jumped out at me as a negative was your "passionate" section:

Right now I am most passionate about building on my self-reinvention journey I began last year. I'm getting myself in better shape, going out more, trying new things, and meeting new people. Almost everything I do now is centered around being a more complete person.

I think this is not going to go over well with a lot of matches, although some will like it -- it can be interpreted as 'My life has basically been a big mess but now I'm working on getting it together, and really that's about all I'm paying attention to these days." -- I'm exaggerating! but it does plant that little seed in the mind.

But my main problem with it is that it doesn't really tell me much about you. IMO nearly everyone is pursuing self-development, consciously or not, so it doesn't really differentiate you.

I prefer "passionate" sections that pick a specific topic, then say why you love it, and how you pursue it in your life. The exact topic is not very important -- it's more just adding a sense of Passion to the profile, and getting more of a window into who you are.
 
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GoldSpider is offline GoldSpider Post #13  June 30,2011, 1:13pm
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Thanks again to everyone for their most helpful feedback! Here's take #2!

(Still 32/M)

Other than your parents, who has been the most influential person in your life and why?
My best friend, who has been a big part of shaping my life since college. He helped bring me out of my shell and is an indispensable source of advice.

What is the most important quality that you are looking for in another person?
My ideal match is affectionate, confident, health-conscious, intelligent, and outgoing.

Other than your appearance, what is the first thing that people notice about you?
I observe courtesies that are often neglected anymore, such as opening doors and pushing in chairs. I try to set an example for how a lady should be treated.

What is the ONE thing that people DON'T notice about you right away that you WISH they WOULD?
I have a very warm, easygoing side that can be hidden by some first-date jitters. As I get more comfortable with someone, my personality blossoms.

What are five things that you "can't live without?"
-My alarm clock
 -A challenging and fulfilling career
 -My iPhone
 -Philadelphia and Penn State football
 -The occasional junk-food indulgence
Describe the last book that you read and enjoyed. What was it about? What did you like most about it?
The last book I read was "It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Cr*p as News". It is a critical look at the Mass Media and the go-to stories used when there is a lack of hard news to report. An interesting perspective on the state of contemporary news reporting.

What are you most passionate about?
My most recent passion is running. I am preparing for the Harrisburg Mile Corporate Challenge; this year I am on my company's "first team" (the one that counts!). I would also like to participate in a few more 5Ks this summer, and might try to run a half-marathon in the Fall.

What are the THREE things for which you are MOST thankful?
My parents, for raising me to be independent and considerate.
My wide variety of friends, for their guidance and perspective.
My past relationships, for always teaching me something about myself.

The four things your friends say about you are:
Good Listener
Articulate
Genuine
Sweet

What are three of my best life skills?
Achieving personal goals
Communicating my innermost thoughts and feelings
Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things

How do you typically spend your leisure time?

I play in HYP (local civic organization) sports leagues once a week for most of the year (flag football, dodgeball, and kickball). I like to go out to a quiet bar for a Tröegs or two once a week. I occasionally find myself working on a small pencil drawing. I'm also looking forward to getting my motorcycle back from the shop so I can finally start riding this year. I would like to spend more time doing things outdoors such as camping and hiking, and perhaps an occasional trip to the beach.
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #14  June 30,2011, 6:05pm
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I'm with above ...be less literal in your 5 things. My note above I forgot to "blue" my note on this.

Also...the bad word....probably CARP.
 
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GoldSpider is offline GoldSpider Post #15  June 30,2011, 7:52pm
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KikiAZ wrote :
I'm with above ...be less literal in your 5 things. My note above I forgot to "blue" my note on this.

Also...the bad word....probably CARP.
I guess it didn't let me post the update. Made a bunch of changes.
 
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Apuleuis is offline Apuleuis Post #16  June 30,2011, 8:14pm
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I always think its strange when health-conscious is mentioned. What does that mean? I read it as you only date thin women. Then you combine that with low-maintenance. To me personally when a guy puts physical attributes (or something that can be read as a physical attribute) on his list, it makes me feel they are shallow. If you want a girl to look a certain way, just look at her pictures and close the ones your not attracted to.

In general, I thought your profile was generic. I would have read it, and you would have blended with my other matches. I did like your book choice, it was interesting and showed personality.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #17  July 1,2011, 2:22am
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Apuleuis wrote :
I always think its strange when health-conscious is mentioned. What does that mean? I read it as you only date thin women. Then you combine that with low-maintenance. To me personally when a guy puts physical attributes (or something that can be read as a physical attribute) on his list, it makes me feel they are shallow. If you want a girl to look a certain way, just look at her pictures and close the ones your not attracted to.....
Health Conscious is not specifying a physical attribute.

And then you make a comment about combining that with "low-maintenance" as something that can be read as a physcial attribute? Not as far as I know!

I also don't see mentioning being health conscious equates to seeking thin women.

I also think if a woman viewed his profile and called him "shallow" because of his preferences then I'd see that as the woman having issues rather than a fault in the profile. Everyone is allow preferences without being insulted with terms like "shallow".

It's also worth pointing out that photos aren't always sufficient to filter on physical shape/size so your comment about using the photos for this is also not applicable.
Last edited by SteveManchesterEngland; July 1,2011 at 2:32am.
 
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GoldSpider is offline GoldSpider Post #18  July 1,2011, 2:11pm
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Let's try this again:
Other than your parents, who has been the most influential person in your life and why?
 My best friend, who has been a big part of shaping my life since college. He helped bring me out of my shell and is an indispensable source of advice.

 What is the most important quality that you are looking for in another person?
My ideal match is affectionate, confident, health-conscious, intelligent, and outgoing.

 Other than your appearance, what is the first thing that people notice about you?
 I observe courtesies that are often neglected anymore, such as opening doors and pushing in chairs. I try to set an example for how a lady should be treated.

 What is the ONE thing that people DON'T notice about you right away that you WISH they WOULD?
 I have a very warm, easygoing side that can be hidden by some first-date jitters. As I get more comfortable with someone, my personality really starts to blossom.

 What are five things that you "can't live without?"
 My alarm clock
 A challenging and fulfilling career
 My iPhone
 Philadelphia and Penn State football
 The occasional junk-food indulgence

 Describe the last book that you read and enjoyed. What was it about? What did you like most about it?
The last book I read was "It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off **** as News". It is a critical look at the Mass Media and the go-to stories used when there is a lack of hard news to report. An interesting perspective on the state of contemporary news reporting.

 What are you most passionate about?
My most recent passion is running. I am preparing for the Harrisburg Mile Corporate Challenge; this year I am on my company's "first team" (the one that counts!). I would also like to participate in a few more 5Ks this summer, and might try to run a half-marathon in the Fall.

 What are the THREE things for which you are MOST thankful?
My parents, for raising me to be independent and considerate.
 My wide variety of friends, for their guidance and perspective.
 My past relationships, for always teaching me something about myself.

The four things your friends say about you are:
Good Listener
 Articulate
 Genuine
 Sweet

 What are three of my best life skills?
Achieving personal goals
 Communicating my innermost thoughts and feelings
 Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things

 How do you typically spend your leisure time?
I play in HYP (local civic organization) sports leagues once a week for most of the year (flag football, dodgeball, and kickball). I like to go out to a quiet bar for a Tröegs or two once a week. I occasionally find myself working on a small pencil drawing. I'm also looking forward to getting my motorcycle back from the shop so I can finally start riding this year. I would like to spend more time doing things outdoors such as camping and hiking, and perhaps an occasional trip to the beach.
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #19  July 1,2011, 2:26pm
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LOVELY!

Except the obvious lack of GO STEELERS!
 
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