tootsiepop is offline tootsiepop Post #1  June 20,2011, 2:49pm
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Let me know what you think of this profile. I am getting nowhere after several times trying. Do I sound too busy?

The one thing I am most passionate about:
I am a generally passionate person with lots of diverse interests. I am passionate about doing something good for myself daily, surrounding myself with supportive, good friends, spending time with my kids...fantasy football... doing my best at work, getting a little crazy once in a while, getting a good workout a few times a week, maintaining stability for myself and the children..laughing a lot, keeping a good relationship with my family, learning new things, traveling to new places, keeping an open mind.. I guess you get the picture. Just out to enjoy my time on earth! I want no regr…


The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:
Someone with some substance who looks to experience new things with someone special. A companion to laugh and share special times with, and ultimately, a wonderful lover.

The most influential person in my life has been:

I would have to say my high school Chemistry teacher who imparted upon me a true love of science and the joy of things that "come together". He was also my anatomy teacher later on and filled me with the desire to learn more and do more in the scientific field which is why I am in medicine today. Funny thing is, I'm sure he has no idea he had such an influence on me.
The three things which I am most thankful for:
  • my children
  • my family
  • my career
Three of my best life-skills are:
  • Communicating my innermost thoughts and feelings
  • Raising and/or caring for children
  • Maintaining a network of close friends
The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:

I have a very soft side, despite that fact that I come off as very independent. I would love for someone to take care of me once in a while and tell me what we are doing for the day. I get tired of always being in charge.


The first thing people notice about me:

I was recently described as a "tootsie pop" by someone I had just met. Hard on the outside but soft on the inside.. I thought that was funny. I have been told that I am a bit intimidating, which I find to be really silly. I am a confident person and am proud of what I have accomplished, having come from very little. I don't think there is anything wrong with being proud of who you are. But, I am also a very humble person and do not like to sing my own accolades.


Some additional information I want you to know:

I am a down to earth person and I appreciate fellow "real" people..I love my children, have a succesful career and have a busy social and family life that has not a lot to be desired. I would really love someone to share it with.


My interests

I typically spend my leisure time:

At the gym, traveling, working around the house, sailing, riding my bike, playing with my kids, going out with friends. Snuggling up next to the fire with a good movie. I train for triathlons in between all that, completed 9 so far. My goal is to do 3 olympic length triathlons this summer. I get a great deal of satisfaction in attaining my goals, especially in this way. Triathlons are the one thing I do for myself, since I am always doing things for other people. Kids, patients..etc...

The last book I read and enjoyed:

I read tons of books.. Just finished Cleopatra, now I'm reading the Game of Thrones series.. I'll read whatever... I am a member of a book club and enjoy those books and discussions.


According to my friends:

My friends describe me as:
  • Dependable
  • Genuine
  • Energetic
  • Intelligent
Last edited by tootsiepop; June 20,2011 at 3:03pm. Reason: add pictures
 
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eha_answer_man is offline eha_answer_man Post #2  June 20,2011, 2:58pm

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Your statements regarding what you are passionate about are... underwhelming.

You frequently diminish the things you mention.

Overall tone comes across as "I'm a boring person."

Do you have recent, actual photos of yourself in your profile? No photos = no replies for the most part.

Just a guess...you are in the "few extra pounds" category right ? (Yes, I saw where you said you are doing triathlons, it doesn't matter).
 
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MediumSalsa is offline MediumSalsa Post #3  June 20,2011, 3:10pm
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Your statements regarding what you are passionate about are... underwhelming.

You frequently diminish the things you mention.

Overall tone comes across as "I'm a boring person."

Do you have recent, actual photos of yourself in your profile? No photos = no replies for the most part.

Just a guess...you are in the "few extra pounds" category right ? (Yes, I saw where you said you are doing triathlons, it doesn't matter).
You offer no actual critique, but you do come across as rather harsh.

I think the OP's profile needs a bit of work but I feel that there is a lot to work with. As far as your passions, I would focus on one thing and go into greater detail. I would also delete this line, "I am a down to earth person and I appreciate fellow "real" people" it comes across as sounding negative for some reason.

Good luck!
 
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tootsiepop is offline tootsiepop Post #4  June 20,2011, 3:12pm
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Here are my pics.. I did not know how to upload them the first time.

Wow.. boring?? ouch!
Attached Images
File Type: jpg Mandy capt sparrow cropped.jpg (92.1 KB, 28 views)
File Type: jpg mandy at the helm.jpg (40.6 KB, 28 views)
File Type: jpg mandy cruise.jpg (80.7 KB, 28 views)
File Type: jpg mandy diving.jpg (46.6 KB, 28 views)
File Type: jpg mandy greece.jpg (60.9 KB, 28 views)
 
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eha_answer_man is offline eha_answer_man Post #5  June 20,2011, 3:28pm

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tootsiepop wrote :

Here are my pics.. I did not know how to upload them the first time.
My point was they need to be in your profile if they are not. No need to post them here.
 
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tootsiepop is offline tootsiepop Post #6  June 20,2011, 3:30pm
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My point was they need to be in your profile if they are not. No need to post them here.
Well, here they are..I was assuming you thought they were not there since I didn't attach them the first time.
Thanks.
 
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eha_answer_man is offline eha_answer_man Post #7  June 20,2011, 3:33pm

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MediumSalsa wrote :

You offer no actual critique, but you do come across as rather harsh.

I think the OP's profile needs a bit of work but I feel that there is a lot to work with. As far as your passions, I would focus on one thing and go into greater detail. I would also delete this line, "I am a down to earth person and I appreciate fellow "real" people" it comes across as sounding negative for some reason.

Good luck!
Actually, I did offer critique with specifics.

Either you lack proper understanding of the term critique or you lack in reading comprehension.

What I did not do is rewrite the OP's profile for her.
People get paid for doing that kind of work.

So rather than objecting to honest feedback the OP requested which other's choose to provide, do something constructive.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #8  June 20,2011, 3:37pm
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This profile reads like so many other profiles I see on eHarmony and doesn't do much to stand out from the crowd. That should be your goal...making yourself stand out in a way that the guy on the other ends says "this is someone I really want to meet."

The passionate answer sets the tone for the rest of the profile. In my mind, it says a lot without saying much at all. As was suggested, try to refine it down to something a little more specific. It feels more like "if I throw enough stuff up there, hopefully something will stick."

I'd like to see a little more on the three thankful. I always like it when I see something like "My career - I'm one of the lucky people that loves what I do" or something like that.

I liked your answer about your chemistry teacher.
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #9  June 21,2011, 12:29pm
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MicMan wrote :
This profile reads like so many other profiles I see on eHarmony and doesn't do much to stand out from the crowd. That should be your goal...making yourself stand out in a way that the guy on the other ends says "this is someone I really want to meet."
Tootsie - I agree with MicMan. When I first started on EH, I thought I had a "pretty good" profile. I thought it sounded like me, and did a pretty good job of conveying what you can expect when you meet me. And, it was boring as hell.

Writing a good profile is not easy. I have done a lot of work on my online profile since I first started, and I think it is much better than my first pass, even though I thought that was "pretty good". But, it still needs work, and is an ever-evolving process. The point is, "pretty good" doesn't win you many points with your profile, unless you are also "really hot". Then it doesn't really matter all that much what is in your profile. I saw your photos, and you are cute, and your photos show your quirky side. But, "hot" and "cute" are 2 completely different things with online dating.

wrote :
But, I am also a very humble person and do not like to sing my own accolades.
This right here is the biggest obstacle I found in writing a decent profile. It is very difficult to "sing your own accolades" without sounding like a blowhard. But, really, you have to! Who else is going to do that for you? It is all too easy to fill your profile with self-deprecating humor, and talking down about yourself. You might think that comes off as "humble". But, online, that is often read as "lack of self-confidence", and is very unappealing in a potential date/mate.

I got a lot of great advice on my profile here on eHA (and I also had a lot of help from my writer friend, so special thanks to her!). I posted my profile twice for review - the first time as a relative newbie, and later after I had hung around the boards for a while. The thing I found out is that my original profile showed none of the "spark" that my eHA posts sometimes do. I have tried to build more of that into my online profile(s). Just because you're serious about finding a date online doesn't mean that your profile has to be very serious.

I don't have specific comments on content for you right now, but that's my 2 cents. Good luck!
 
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paintandbooks is offline paintandbooks Post #10  June 21,2011, 12:51pm
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One observation - Where in your leisure time is a man going to fit? It sounds like he would have to be a triathlete to get much time with you. I look at this category immediately on every match, to see if I'd have to take up ululating or roller derby, what have you, in order to share interests. What is fun for you to do on dates? This is a good place to reveal a bit of that. Your qualities and interests and activities are very admirable, but admiration is not the objective here. You want to also show that you are approachable and playful and fun and warm, like your photos. Just my two cents, fwiw.
Last edited by paintandbooks; June 21,2011 at 12:52pm. Reason: absentee consonants
 
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