Do All Men Want an Outdoors Activity Girl?


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melissatrv1 is offline melissatrv1 Post #1  May 19,2011, 7:59pm
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Despite the matching criteria here, there is no setting or preference for this. I am not an "outdoors" girl? I prefer indoor activities such as dinner, movies, art galleries, theatre, gym, indoor social events. As outdoors as I get is the dog park. Part of the reason for this is that I am a night owl. Yet virtually every profile I have viewed the guy is white water rafting, camping, fishing, jumping out of planes.

I have always believed that we should have our common interests as well as things we do outside the relationship. So I am ok if a guy I am in a relationship with wants to go camping with his buddies without me.

My question is, if a man has this in his profile, is he necessarily looking for woman who wants to camp and fish also? Many times I will read a profile and see we have lots in common and then see he LOVES kayaking. This usually prevents me from contacting them because I think this is what they are looking for in a woman.

Guys can you weigh in and let me know if this is the case? And are there any guys out there who are ok with indoor activities I am beginning to feel like an anomaly!
 
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LongLocks is offline LongLocks Post #2  May 19,2011, 8:08pm
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Heh, I'm a huge outdoors activity type of gal and still can't meet a man!

Marking my spot here to see how the guys respond.
 
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tangochef is offline tangochef Post #3  May 19,2011, 8:11pm
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I think it all depends on the importance of the activity, and investment into that activity. If the guy says he likes camping, and shows pictures of his RV, I'd say he would not be a match.

However, there are compromises. For example, I like to sail on some vacations, so I will rent a sailboat for a week or more at BVI, Mediterranean, Agean sea etc., I would not expect for you to do more than lounge in your bikini while I do the work, and participate in indoor activities later .
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #4  May 19,2011, 8:15pm
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There is at least one man on these boards who has posted several times that fresh air and the outdoors is what you pass through on the way from your high-rise luxury condo to the taxi waiting right outside your door.

j8a
 
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stagingbulb is offline stagingbulb Post #5  May 19,2011, 8:21pm
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LongLocks wrote :
Heh, I'm a huge outdoors activity type of gal and still can't meet a man!

Marking my spot here to see how the guys respond.
Mark away!

I look for someone who enjoys the outdoors. For me, camping and hiking are table stakes for a girl, at least humor me. It helps if she skis already, if not she's willing to learn. She doesn't have to do it well and it won't bore me if we play around on bunny slopes. I'll ski with just about anyone. It's about the company and the adventure.

Personally, I don't like being inside. I'm inside all week at work. I am inside doing homework with the kids. Nature is my place and I just want to share it.
 
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charmed59 is offline charmed59 Post #6  May 19,2011, 10:00pm
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I once had a profile that said I loved the outdoors but I couldn't stand dirt. Tennis, golf, road biking, and day hikes are good. Beaches are good (I don't consider sand dirt). I don't camp. It worked like a charm.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #7  May 20,2011, 4:36am
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melissatrv1 wrote :
Despite the matching criteria here, there is no setting or preference for this. I am not an "outdoors" girl? I prefer indoor activities such as dinner, movies, art galleries, theatre, gym, indoor social events. As outdoors as I get is the dog park. Part of the reason for this is that I am a night owl. Yet virtually every profile I have viewed the guy is white water rafting, camping, fishing, jumping out of planes.
Sometimes it's just the "cool photo factor" ... So I wouldn't assume anything unless the profile, OC or first meeting backed up these activities

wrote :
I have always believed that we should have our common interests as well as things we do outside the relationship. So I am ok if a guy I am in a relationship with wants to go camping with his buddies without me.
Sure common interest help. However it's discovering what those common interest (new and old) are together. So it not always going to be something you are I already have a passion for. I'm a huge golfer.. Do I expect my matches to play golf, no I don't...if she does then bonus..

wrote :
My question is, if a man has this in his profile, is he necessarily looking for woman who wants to camp and fish also? Many times I will read a profile and see we have lots in common and then see he LOVES kayaking. This usually prevents me from contacting them because I think this is what they are looking for in a woman.
Look at this way, most of the ladies profiles all say.. 'I love to shop'.. or 'I love to run' I don't automatically assume that I must go shopping or run a marathon with her..

Hobbies and interests are a nice to have and a bonus when they happen.. IMO it's values and relationship goals that more likely will prevail.

However if someone is a complete couch potato and not willing to try or experience new things, then that's another story..
Last edited by TrekRyder10; May 20,2011 at 8:48am.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #8  May 20,2011, 6:00am
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melissatrv1 wrote :
...virtually every profile I have viewed the guy is white water rafting, camping, fishing, jumping out of planes.
...
I think this is because a lot of these men want to reassure massively to the women who view their profiles that they aren't boring and have a very active life.

The most common and boring questions I've been asked via match are "what are you upto this weekend" "did you have a nice weekend" "what did you do at the weekend" etc. This is I believe because they are looking for a man who isn't sat at home watching TV all weekends like they believe a lot of men do.

I read lots of profiles about watching a dvd with a bottle of red. Maybe that's an english thing but apparently all women do is drink and watch dvds while men white water raft or mountain climb!

I eventually rewrote my profile to say I was looking for a woman who likes to watch a bottle of red wine whilst drinking a DVD and generally threw in lots of other samey profile text in about being in a log cabin while I do this etc
 
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Harryoss is offline Harryoss Post #9  May 20,2011, 8:31am
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melissatrv1 wrote :
Despite the matching criteria here, there is no setting or preference for this. I am not an "outdoors" girl? I prefer indoor activities such as dinner, movies, art galleries, theatre, gym, indoor social events. As outdoors as I get is the dog park. Part of the reason for this is that I am a night owl. Yet virtually every profile I have viewed the guy is white water rafting, camping, fishing, jumping out of planes.

I have always believed that we should have our common interests as well as things we do outside the relationship. So I am ok if a guy I am in a relationship with wants to go camping with his buddies without me.

My question is, if a man has this in his profile, is he necessarily looking for woman who wants to camp and fish also? Many times I will read a profile and see we have lots in common and then see he LOVES kayaking. This usually prevents me from contacting them because I think this is what they are looking for in a woman.

Guys can you weigh in and let me know if this is the case? And are there any guys out there who are ok with indoor activities I am beginning to feel like an anomaly!
The way I see it, any online profile has some kind of exaggeration and misrepresentation in it, one way or another. So to answer the question: "Do all men want an outdoors activity girl?" I'll say, about as many as the women who want "an adventurous guy who has a great sense of humor and lives life to the fullest"... I treat these particular statements as noise... something I have to sift through in order to focus on the actual signal underneath... the one that actually tells me something about the person.

As for the bolded statement in the quote above particularly, don't do that. Never disregard a profile on such nonsense... Always ask the question if it's something you'd like clarified. First and foremost, you don't even know if he'd want a woman to go with him when he goes kayaking, even if he does so on a weekly basis (doubtful)... and secondly, that photo of him kayaking... that's most probably from 2 years ago, which was about the only time he's been kayaking. Point being: If you believed everyone's misrepresentation of themselves in their online profiles, 90% of the country should be an adrenaline junky... And yet we all know that's not true.

On a final note, and this you can take to heart with just about anything that comes to mind about online dating: It is always in your best interest to not make any assumptions or jump to conclusions. Just ask the question to the person if you're wondering what they meant by something in their profile.

Best of luck to you.
 
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FairOne is offline FairOne Post #10  May 20,2011, 8:47am
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Yeah, I agree that these guys are saying these things most likely to make themselves seem more exciting and adventerous than they may actually be. I'm not downing that, it's a profile and you've to sell yourself, I just wouldn't take every word so seriously. Often you'll notice they aren't saying that they want their partner to do those things, just that they do them.

And I definitely wouldn't take myself out of the running for it: the odds that these guys are skydiving, white water rafting and running marathons every weekend are quite slim :-)

On the other hand, pay attention to patterns, not only through the profile but through communications. Maybe he really does hike and bike ride every weekend, and his first date suggestion is a bike ride- that's when I'd bring up possible compatibility issues if you aren't interested in doing those things, even on occasion.
 
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