Did I say something wrong?


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Damion1287 is offline Damion1287 Post #1  May 17,2011, 10:28am
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Hey everyone,

So hears the story, I was communicating with a match that I had actually met in the past through work, so once I confirmed that it was indeed that girl that used to work at my store, I sent her this message:

"Haha I knew it! One in a million for sure, I remember you like it was yesterday, I'm doing well, how are you doing?"

Now I was referencing the odds of us meeting on eharmony, and I never really forgot her since it was 2 years ago.

So after this message, she closed me, I don't get it, did I say something wrong in that statement? Any help would be appreciated. Thank you.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #2  May 17,2011, 10:32am
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Guess she didn't remember you..


Who knows she's probably embarrassed and freaked out...
 
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Damion1287 is offline Damion1287 Post #3  May 17,2011, 10:34am
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Well I don't expect people to remember me, so I wouldn't take it personally if someone forgot who I was, after all we didn't really know each other at the time, for me I'm just good with faces and names...so I think.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #4  May 17,2011, 11:16am
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Since she has already met you in real life, she already knows there is no romantic potential there, so she closed you out. No point in wasting time on a dead end from her perspective.
 
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ami1uwant is offline ami1uwant Post #5  May 17,2011, 11:52am
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Damion1287 wrote :
Hey everyone,

So hears the story, I was communicating with a match that I had actually met in the past through work, so once I confirmed that it was indeed that girl that used to work at my store, I sent her this message:

"Haha I knew it! One in a million for sure, I remember you like it was yesterday, I'm doing well, how are you doing?"

Now I was referencing the odds of us meeting on eharmony, and I never really forgot her since it was 2 years ago.

So after this message, she closed me, I don't get it, did I say something wrong in that statement? Any help would be appreciated. Thank you.

Your comment is very stalkerish.


Did you mention to her that you thought you knew her from working at xyz?

If you did, or you comment jarred her memory and she remembered who you were and closed you because she didnt want people from her past.

How rare is this...really not all that rare...especially if you live in a smaller town and not a major metro area.

If I moved back to my hometown and restricted the matches and close as possible in distance or in age I WILL DEFINITELY be matched with someone I met before or she has common friends with me.
 
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Damion1287 is offline Damion1287 Post #6  May 17,2011, 5:23pm
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DancingFool wrote :
Since she has already met you in real life, she already knows there is no romantic potential there, so she closed you out. No point in wasting time on a dead end from her perspective.
She was interested, I know this because she was the one to initiate open communication, and we never said a word to each other at where I work.
Last edited by Damion1287; May 17,2011 at 5:33pm.
 
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Damion1287 is offline Damion1287 Post #7  May 17,2011, 5:26pm
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ami1uwant wrote :
Your comment is very stalkerish.


Did you mention to her that you thought you knew her from working at xyz?

If you did, or you comment jarred her memory and she remembered who you were and closed you because she didnt want people from her past.

How rare is this...really not all that rare...especially if you live in a smaller town and not a major metro area.

If I moved back to my hometown and restricted the matches and close as possible in distance or in age I WILL DEFINITELY be matched with someone I met before or she has common friends with me.
Yes I did point out where I remembered her from, but I wasn't sure so I asked to confirm, from what I remember she was with the company where I work for a limited time, but like I said, I'm good at remembering faces
 
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FaintestInkling is offline FaintestInkling Post #8  May 17,2011, 5:48pm
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You probably shouldn't have said "I remember you like it was yesterday."

I realize it's just an expression (I assume), and it shouldn't "kill interest" so easily, but she probably took that ball and ran with it, and decided something like, "Oh great, he's some 'creeper' I used to work with who used to stare at me so much that he remembers it like it was yesterday, even though it was years ago."

There's not necessarily a "rational" reason why it freaked her out. It just freaked her out. A lot of people are very touchy about using online dating in the first place (for some reason), and are rather quick to close, even if they were previously interested-seeming.

It's also possible she just lost interest or preferred another match, but I don't think that's likely because in that case she'd probably have just stopped answering rather than actually close.
 
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myusernamehere is online now myusernamehere Post #9  May 17,2011, 5:59pm
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FaintestInkling wrote :
You probably shouldn't have said "I remember you like it was yesterday."

I realize it's just an expression (I assume), and it shouldn't "kill interest" so easily, but she probably took that ball and ran with it, and decided something like, "Oh great, he's some 'creeper' I used to work with who used to stare at me so much that he remembers it like it was yesterday, even though it was years ago."

There's not necessarily a "rational" reason why it freaked her out. It just freaked her out. A lot of people are very touchy about using online dating in the first place (for some reason), and are rather quick to close, even if they were previously interested-seeming.

It's also possible she just lost interest or preferred another match, but I don't think that's likely because in that case she'd probably have just stopped answering rather than actually close.
So true. Women are crazy.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #10  May 17,2011, 6:00pm
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I wonder if she had an inkling that you were "that guy" she had met through work a couple of years ago and wanted to be sure it was you as well. Could be she didn't feel it then and knows it won't head anywhere so why waste time. But, she should have probably said something about why she was closing.

But, out of sight out of mind is so much easier these days.
 
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