paintandbooks is offline paintandbooks Post #11  May 16,2011, 9:24am
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Oh, but what I like best about eH is that you get more information up front than other sites! It matters to me whether the two of us are going to have deeply engaging conversations. I can have a pleasant date or a funny date with a huge range of people, but I'm only going to want to pursue matches where there is mutual mental stimulation, and the MHCS do shed a little light on that possibility. I've already had plenty of pleasant and funny dates in my life, and I truly enjoyed all that - I'm just in a different place now, and the more superficial matches don't rate space in my schedule... I do agree, put the MHCS as part of a profile, rather than a stage, but the other steps are invaluable to me.
Last edited by paintandbooks; May 16,2011 at 9:28am.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #12  May 16,2011, 10:55am
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mitchell, since anyone can "technically" lie to the site when they sign up, it's not really eH's fault he got through. I would report him.
 
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FairOne is offline FairOne Post #13  May 16,2011, 11:26am
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paintandbooks wrote :
Oh, but what I like best about eH is that you get more information up front than other sites! It matters to me whether the two of us are going to have deeply engaging conversations. I can have a pleasant date or a funny date with a huge range of people, but I'm only going to want to pursue matches where there is mutual mental stimulation, and the MHCS do shed a little light on that possibility. I've already had plenty of pleasant and funny dates in my life, and I truly enjoyed all that - I'm just in a different place now, and the more superficial matches don't rate space in my schedule... I do agree, put the MHCS as part of a profile, rather than a stage, but the other steps are invaluable to me.
I definitely can understand your point of view on this too. And the more I hear it the more I think, if they must exist, having the MHCS as part of the profile isn't a bad idea.
 
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joesch is offline joesch Post #14  May 16,2011, 11:34am
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I think it's a lot of information to put out there too. Maybe the system is giving TMI but I think as a reasonable person I am capable not reading too much in to what someone puts about his or herself on a web site. I mean, we're all human and I think if you're looking to find love you'll have to believe that.
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #15  May 16,2011, 11:55am
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AndieIsMe wrote :
mitchell, since anyone can "technically" lie to the site when they sign up, it's not really eH's fault he got through. I would report him.
I know. I am thinking about that. But, since I've actually met him, and he wasn't a bad guy, I feel bad about that. He said his divorce will be final in a couple of months, so by the time EH gets around to kicking him off, he actually will be divorced. Then, he'd probably know that I was the one who reported him, and he has my contact info (doesn't know my last name or where I live). If he was a big jerk, I would report him. Ugh. I hate being in this position. Why can't people just be honest, for crying out loud!
 
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ami1uwant is offline ami1uwant Post #16  May 16,2011, 2:09pm
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I have always said the must haves/cant stands need to change to more things like interests and character where people have things they like or dislike.

I bet you can survey profiles and find 8 of 10 of the choices are in 85% of the profiles on EHarmony. The cant stands are the worst of the worst in people.

Instead have choices like:

into politics...
love camping

or
tend to very neat
loves to cook
love to hunt
These lists are saying something about you and what you would want in a partner.

Someone may want a neat freak because it conpliments them...but others want nothing to do with a neat freak.

Some will love and some will hate hunting.

It would be better screening to see if you and them are a good match.
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #17  May 16,2011, 5:53pm
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I don't understand why eHarmony doesn't just throw all the MH/CS into their computer during the Matching process. Add it to the mix. Maybe on a sliding scale.

Kinda like Matching based on Values and Beliefs.

j8a
 
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