How far do you look for matches?


View Poll Results: What's your opinion on the subject?
I don't limit my matches based on location/have met 1+. 2 15.38%
I do limit my matches, but my boundaries are flexible. 4 30.77%
I do limit my matches, and I stick with my range. 6 46.15%
I have contacted long distance matches, but never met any of them. 1 7.69%
Voters: 13. You may not vote on this poll

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kermibly is offline kermibly Post #1  January 2,2011, 2:23pm
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Do you look at the city/state by the person's name and turn them down if they don't live within your respected range? Even if they contact you first? I'm just curious to know. Because my town is small to begin with, and since Eharmony limits my matches based on compatibility, I have no choice but to look elsewhere. Though it makes me nervous because when it comes down to it, am I going to really travel that far to meet them? Especially when there's a good chance it might not be worth it?
 
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Beachedgenie is offline Beachedgenie Post #2  January 2,2011, 3:01pm
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I used to be flexible, then I flew to New Hampture from Florida to meet a man who was exactly the opposite of what he pretended to be online/phone. I could get into all the nitty-gritty horror story of it, but I'd rather just say that people 'lie'. It may be intentional, it may be that they are living in the past, it may be that they just have the wrong impression of themselves, the only one that can assess that is you.
That experience not only made me realize that people lie, but that I will never be able to really get to know someone without spending a good amount of time with them in person. Which just isn't possible at a long distance.
If he is more than a 2hour drive away, sorry, no. I am not looking for a pen-pal.

eH may not be the only way you want to go if your choices are so limited by distance. You may want to try other sites as well like plenty of fish and ok cupid.
I also suggest that you decide how far YOU are willing to travel, then double it, expecting that he should be able/willing to travel just as far to meet you in the middle. (That's where I get my 2 hour drive)
Last edited by Beachedgenie; January 2,2011 at 3:05pm.
 
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paintandbooks is offline paintandbooks Post #3  January 2,2011, 3:27pm
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On Planet Earth.

Any earthling whose pics and profile strike me. There are not so many that this is a problem

Keep in mind i am self-employed and can work anywhere, and have already fulfilled some of the concerns of younger folks.

If there is a choice, a location that interests me beats one that doesn't, of course.

Have split who-travels-first with various eh and match guys pretty much evenly. Anyone I travelled for always worked out for a while, some good fun, more than worth the effort.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #4  January 2,2011, 3:38pm
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I stick to my range. I am not open to long distance matches, So I don't waste my time expanding my radius only to receive more matches that I never plan on meeting.

I wouldn't say that eH limits your matches. Most people use eH for a specific reason - the 29 dimensions. The idea that eH is sending you compatiable matches, instead browsing through the database daily, is what appeals too many of it's subscribers.

If you want the ability to window shop, then EH may not be the best fit for you. Many people choose to be on multiple site for this very reason.

Make a decision on the radius and stick with it, otherwise receiving matches daily that you have no intention on meeting with only frustrate you to no end.
Last edited by TrekRyder10; January 2,2011 at 3:46pm.
 
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thecowfarmer is offline thecowfarmer Post #5  January 2,2011, 5:04pm
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I think it is silly to meet someone outside of a 20-30min drive that you meet on eharmony. That is just my opinion though.
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #6  January 2,2011, 5:12pm
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I am no longer actively participating on eHarmony, but I had my distance setting at 30 miles (the shortest distance they'd allow) and the importance setting as "high." I would have set it at about half that if I could have.

I did not want a long-distance romance. My lifestyle would not allow for regularly meeting someone who lives even an hour away, and I believe you need to be able to regularly meet with your match in order for a relationship to grow.

I did long-distance for a year and a half in college when my then-boyfriend moved 400 miles away. It was a very painful experience and I will not re-live that... especially in a new relationship where you don't know the person already and there is no level of trust already established.
 
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Mtn_Man is offline Mtn_Man Post #7  January 2,2011, 5:26pm
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I have accepted that all my matches will be long distance.

I live in a small mountain town and in a year and a half I've never received a match less than an hour and a half drive. I've had 1 date. I know most women will close me out because of their range. I'm looking for the one who wants to join me in the mountains!

It's OK. I chose to live here, but it is frustrating.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  January 2,2011, 5:28pm
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I have my distance set to 30 miles. It is more about the time than the miles. I like to limit my travel time to about 1 hour. But I have made exceptions.
 
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Getting_There is offline Getting_There Post #9  January 2,2011, 6:40pm
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When I used EH I finally settled on 120 miles to be the max. This allowed me to reach into the major metropolitan area in my own state. I met my bf on EH and we are about 95 miles apart and have been dating since early Oct '10 (matched early Sept).

Interestingly I only met 1 guy within 15 minutes. All others were between 60-100 miles when I had the 120 set.

I met some matches which were between 4-5 hours but I learned there is a higher bar for that distance for both of us. We had fun communicating and meeting but reality hits for both after meeting a long distance match when you think thru all the travel and time involved is my experience anyway.
 
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paintandbooks is offline paintandbooks Post #10  January 2,2011, 7:10pm
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Anywhere on the east coast would be nice, yes, but I'd rather take a shot at Mr. Right than Mr. Convenient? And I've only been in this part of the country a year, I don't know whether I'll like it enough to stay, I don't know whether I'll like staying still, most matches I get have lived all sorts of places and don't have geographical allegiances either.
 
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