A Profile Review v2, Please (Male, 43)

namati, there is a question in one of the sets that asks about PDAs (Public Displays of Affection). Maybe you can use this to filter out those women who don't share the same affectionate state that you do.

Your profile reads very "educated" to me. It doesn't really lack personality, but it doesn't give me a "fun loving" vibe either.

Others have stated that the openly affectionate might be a turn off. I think the playful naughtiness (most important section) would be as well. It reads a tiny bit too sexual. This might be better brought up later on. Choose another word like silliness or something that conveys something other than something sexual.

While it seemed my profile was improved after my first review a month ago, the results indicate otherwise. I've since made a few tweaks to it, but nothing has changed. In short, I'm getting nowhere at all.
I remember your first profile, Namati and you've come a long way! Great changes so far.

I started online dating almost six months ago and have been on eHarmony for two months. I was on Match for three months and have been on OKStupid for almost four months. I started on POF a few weeks ago. I've kept my profile as close to my EH profile as the format permits on the other sites. So far, I've talked to one woman on the phone twice who then vanished. I'm saying this just to show that I'm not having a short spell of bad luck.

It's not that communication is stalling at some point - it never starts. From all the above, I've only had two-way communication of any sort at all with four women. I know there are a lot of 'dead' profiles on all the sites, but even allowing for 90% dead, I'm still doing poorly.

I'm at a loss as to why I'm being ignored/blocked/closed from the outset. I thank you in advance for any help you can provide.




The one thing I am most passionate about:

"Life does not suffer from a lack of wonders, only from a lack OF wonder." I am most passionate about exploring these wonders - trivial or profound. I'm always looking for a challenge, be it rollerblading, clock and watch repair, violin making, home improvement or removing stuff I buy from 'security packaging' without using a chain saw.



The most important thing I am looking for in a person is:

In a word, kindness. She should also be openly affectionate, honest, at least a little bit outgoing, bright and creative with a fondness of learning and experiencing new things. A touch of playful naughtiness is more than welcome.



The most influential person in my life has been:

He was the son of my mother's friend and became the older brother that I never had. We met when I was seventeen and spent much time together until he moved away three years later. He always listened when I needed to talk and had much good advice to offer. Mostly by example, he helped me to see how to become a good, honest, responsible and caring person.



The three things which I am most thankful for:

* Having had a loving, caring and not too dysfunctional family to raise and start me on my way.
* Having basically good health in all categories allowing me to provide for myself and make at least a small contribution to society.
* For endless curiosity and creativity.



Three of my best life-skills are:

* Sharing my beliefs through teaching, participation, and example
* Continuing to expand my knowledge and awareness
* Being a good friend and companion



The one thing I wish MORE people would notice about me:

While at first I am sometimes hidden beneath a cloak of formality and shyness, beneath it you will find someone who is charming, passionate, often silly and occasionally quite goofy.



The things I can't live without are:

* Hope
*Someone to hold
* Laughter
* Something to read or a project to work on
* A caffeinated beverage



The first thing people notice about me:

That I am quiet and rather shy. They soon notice I am storehouse of useful and useless information - I am a natural and gifted teacher, but am lacking the annoying know-it-all attitude and any sign of pretentiousness.



Some additional information I want you to know:

I'm basically a hopeless romantic and genuinely love to hold hands and cuddle. I've been told that I'm as affectionate as a puppy - I can be quite content alone at times, but when I'm with someone, I want to be truly with them. While I do not formally practice my faith, I do have a strong spiritual belief. I'm not a big sports fan, but may watch baseball a few times a year. I ask for directions and always put the seat down. While my brain may be wired for logic, I have the soul of a subdued comedian and a heart of mush. I'm very friendly, open minded and easy to get along with.
I read some of the other replies, and I agree with the other women who said where you are asking for someone who is "openly affectionate", that is code word for sex. I would take it out of the other section since you've said the same thing here, only in a less overtly sexual way.

The last book I read and enjoyed:

I read a lot of stuff you probably don't such as text books, books on science and physics, science fiction, computer manuals and 'how to' books. I have also read many of the classics and more popular titles. The last book I read was on memory improvement. I don't recall the title.

How do you know what I read? This assumes I (as your prospective match) doesn't read the same kind of things that you read. What if I do? This would be off-putting to me (as your prospective match). You're already making assumptions about the women you haven't even met yet. Can't you just state "I read a lot of different things, such as text books..."? But the memory joke is funny! Keep that!

It never occurred to me that a women would equate affection with sex. Is not something like "He only touches me if he wants sex" one of the most common complaints of women?

In spite of the above, there are a significant number of women who desire little to no contact outside of sex. There are also those who are 'privately affectionate' - they don't wish to be seen touching their partner. I wish to avoid all of these women entirely. How else can I state this?

Well, I could avoid commonly used phrases like "openly affectionate" and "out of the way places" and spell out exactly what I mean as I just did, but my profile is already said to be too long. I'm not trying to be sarcastic at all - I see no practical solution.

Thank you to everyone for your comments so far!

Your profile brought a smile to my face! I sent that to you when I actually received your profile! So, I've been getting all your updates on my eh page; which is why I recognized your photo on this thread. No response from your end at all, not even a close. Just wondering!