Straight to Communication All the Time?


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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #11  February 1,2011, 5:35am
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I find the must haves/have nots an essential list I want to see and be seen. It filters out people nicely.
 
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SkinsGiants_fan is offline SkinsGiants_fan Post #12  February 1,2011, 3:57pm
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charmed59 wrote :
He had a few reasons he didn't go through the entire GS, the biggest reason being he didn't have 10 deal breakers, either in the must haves or the can't stands. He didn't want to be closed because he had to pick 10. He felt there were too many that could be misconstrued, and didn't want to count on that.
I'm surprised by that explanation. There are plenty of generic Can't Stands, like you can't stand pessimistic or dishonest people. Is he really worried about scaring away pessimistic and dishonest women? Interesting. But different strokes for different folks.
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #13  February 1,2011, 4:24pm
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When I first started on eH a few months ago, I thought that GC was the stupidest, most invasive "questions I would never even ask on a second date let alone first", idiotic thing. I had no idea that was the preferred method of communication on eH for most of the members.

Now that I have been doing this for a while, I have come to realize that it does have its merits.
1) you can "pre-screen" for obvious red flags
2) it does give you something to talk about.
So, when the guy finally does email me with a lame "Hi, how's it going?" I can at least respond back "I noticed you said XX, can I ask you more about that?"

At any rate, it's the nature of the beast, it's what makes eH different from the rest of the pack. Notice, I said different, not better. Every site has it's own little marketing gimmick, and once you get used to it, you figure out how to play the game on that particular site.

Good luck!
 
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charmed59 is offline charmed59 Post #14  February 1,2011, 9:13pm
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SkinsGiants_fan wrote :
I'm surprised by that explanation. There are plenty of generic Can't Stands, like you can't stand pessimistic or dishonest people. Is he really worried about scaring away pessimistic and dishonest women? Interesting. But different strokes for different folks.
The weird thing about it, is by reading responses on here, you would think it wouldn't have worked for him. But by most standards, he was wildly successful. He met the women he wanted to meet.

I have to give eHarmony credit. They offer skipping to OC so folks like him, and me, that don't find the GC all that useful can communicate in a form we find more useful. But they came up with the whole GC idea for the many folks that find having a guide to communications helps them actually communicate. And it works for them. Yes, they did make it possible for everyone to win.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #15  February 2,2011, 2:13am
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SkinsGiants_fan wrote :
I'm surprised by that explanation. There are plenty of generic Can't Stands, like you can't stand pessimistic or dishonest people. Is he really worried about scaring away pessimistic and dishonest women? Interesting. But different strokes for different folks.
I think he was just making an excuse up. I don't believe that was his real reason but he is very polished with his justification.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #16  February 2,2011, 2:16am
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mitchell175 wrote :
When I first started on eH a few months ago, I thought that GC was the stupidest, most invasive "questions I would never even ask on a second date let alone first", idiotic thing. I had no idea that was the preferred method of communication on eH for most of the members.

Now that I have been doing this for a while, I have come to realize that it does have its merits.
1) you can "pre-screen" for obvious red flags
2) it does give you something to talk about.
So, when the guy finally does email me with a lame "Hi, how's it going?" I can at least respond back "I noticed you said XX, can I ask you more about that?"

At any rate, it's the nature of the beast, it's what makes eH different from the rest of the pack. Notice, I said different, not better. Every site has it's own little marketing gimmick, and once you get used to it, you figure out how to play the game on that particular site.

Good luck!
I think it also slows people down a little so it adds a few barriers to men/women who just want to use the site like it's a meat market. They can go to "match" for that.
 
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