The Bad Day Question


View Poll Results: Gents, on your bad day would you rather be:
touched 5 83.33%
cooked for 1 16.67%
taken out on the town 0 0%
talked to 0 0%
Voters: 6. You may not vote on this poll

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tincup is offline tincup Post #1  October 14,2010, 9:26pm
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One of the most common questions I get asked and ask, is the relatively ubiquitous "bad day" question.

If I had a bad day, what is the first thing you would do for me?
a) Cook you dinner
b) Rub your shoulders
c) Talk with you about your day
d) Take you out on the town
e) [custom response]
I love this question because the response is very telling on two levels.

Level I: if you answer a-d I immediately know something about the way you communicate. If you've ever read about the "love languages" your answer a-d will give me insight into your love language.

Level II: I get to know a bit about your relationship maturity.

In my humble opinion, there is a right and a wrong answer to this question. Ultimately, the fact that you would like to cook me dinner doesn't really matter if I want to be talked to. Conversely, if it's your bad day and I want to talk to you but you'd rather be cooked for, my talking won't help the situation any.

What i love about this question is that it gives the person answering the chance to show off their communications skills. The correct answer to this question is "I'll do whatever you want - it's your bad day. Physical contact? you got it. A long conversation? No problem." The mature dater realizes that it's not about them when it's your bad day. Their role is to mitigate your bad day, which is all about giving you love and affection in whichever way you require it.

A male perspective on typical answers:

The overwhelming majority of women who've answered this question a-d, have chosen c, talking. Gals, let me clue you into a little secret. Most men would rather be touched. If you're going to choose a-d, most men are looking for b, shoulder rubbing.

Guys, clearly from my experience, most women would rather be talked to. A classic difference in communication styles between men and women. Something for everyone to keep in mind.

Tincup
 
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pammersw is offline pammersw Post #2  October 14,2010, 9:42pm
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I guess that makes me a mature dater, because this is the answer I use for this question whenever I get it:
wrote :
Depends on your “love language”! I’d try to do what says “I love you” to YOU. My first inclinations, based on my “love language” styles, would be B, then C, then A.
 
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tincup is offline tincup Post #3  October 14,2010, 9:50pm
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perfect!
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #4  October 14,2010, 10:28pm

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I'm pretty simple....just ask me about my day, sincerely listen with care...ok maybe making me a sammich is ok too lol.

(seriously though...all I wanted is a compassionate listening ear...and just hang out, relax and enjoy the evening together).
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #5  October 15,2010, 2:15am

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well, I would say... e. a quickie on the kitchen table to shut up your whining

but, i didn't do so well on EH so don't go by what i say.
 
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ISearch4Love is offline ISearch4Love Post #6  October 15,2010, 3:37am
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I usually say I'll talk to them while rubbing their shoulders.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #7  October 15,2010, 4:54am
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scarlet13 wrote :
well, I would say... e. a quickie on the kitchen table to shut up your whining

but, i didn't do so well on EH so don't go by what i say.
ISearch4Love wrote :
I usually say I'll talk to them while rubbing their shoulders.
I would say talk dirty to me while we're having a quickie on the kitchen table.
 
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Co6aka is offline Co6aka Post #8  October 15,2010, 5:04am
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We dogs don't have "bad days" (that's a human thing) but when I have a ruff day I like to go squirrel-chasing in the park.
 
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ISearch4Love is offline ISearch4Love Post #9  October 15,2010, 5:30am
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I'd rather love someone I can't have than have someone I can't love.

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tweet37 wrote :
I would say talk dirty to me while we're having a quickie on the kitchen table.
That'll only work with a select few matches.
 
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Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #10  October 15,2010, 5:42am
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I've gotten this and put custom answer: E) Whatever would make you feel best.

They are not asking what I would want , they are asking me to guess what they would like, or what I think would work for them.

tincup wrote :
If I had a bad day, what is the first thing you would do for me?
a) Cook you dinner
b) Rub your shoulders
c) Talk with you about your day
d) Take you out on the town
e) [custom response]
 
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