no car - mention in profile?


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bklynsg is offline bklynsg Post #1  October 8,2010, 4:04am
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Hi everyone,

Hoping to get some opinions here -- think I should mention in my profile that I do not have a car?

I live right across the river from new york city, work in nyc, and do not have or need a car. It's not unusual for people in this area to go without one.

I ask because eHarmony is sending me quite a few matches who live in the suburbs, where one might need car. A lot of these places have train and/or bus service to the city.

One fellow who wrote to me said that were we to go out, he supposed he'd have to come pick me up (his words, not mine).

I haven't found a way to make the "match radius" any smaller than 30 miles. And for me, relying on mass transit is not a deal breaker, but I'm the one who doesn't have a car.

So whaddya think, put it in the profile or no? I never thought about it until I received the message with the remark about having to come to my neighborhood because I don't have a car . . .

Thanks!
S.
 
 
TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #2  October 8,2010, 4:13am
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Yup.. put it in your profile, this will benefit you more than it will hurt you. The matches that have a problem with it- will pass you by, and those who don't - you'll know they won't poof because of it.


This is where i would put it

Q: Is there any additional information you would like your matches to know about you?

If possible write your answer with a little humor and a side of serious.
Last edited by TrekRyder10; October 8,2010 at 4:59am.
 
 
bklynsg is offline bklynsg Post #3  October 8,2010, 5:56am
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Thanks so much TrekRyder10.

I'll try to come up with a clever way to put it without sounding too obnoxious about carbon footprints or, more to the point, too annoyed about the high cost of car insurance in NJ.
 
 
Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #4  October 8,2010, 6:04am
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Agree, state it out front. What do you do in real life dating?, just do the same.
bklynsg wrote :
Thanks so much TrekRyder10.

I'll try to come up with a clever way to put it without sounding too obnoxious about carbon footprints or, more to the point, too annoyed about the high cost of car insurance in NJ.
 
 
Immerito is offline Immerito Post #5  October 8,2010, 7:20am
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bklynsg wrote :
Thanks so much TrekRyder10.

I'll try to come up with a clever way to put it without sounding too obnoxious about carbon footprints or, more to the point, too annoyed about the high cost of car insurance in NJ.
Definitely include humor. Something like "I currently do not have a car; my last car was made in the modern Stone Age and frankly, "Fred Flintstone tires" wear out quickly.

Or "I don't have a car. Swinging over New York City via spider thread (don't I wish!) is a faster way to get to work anyway."

If you can get a match to laugh (or even chuckle), they're more likely to communicate.
 
 
ISearch4Love is offline ISearch4Love Post #6  October 8,2010, 2:36pm
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By all means, put it in the profile.
 
 
D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #7  October 9,2010, 2:18pm
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Hmm ... consistent opinion, here.

Personally, I would not say this in a profile, unless it was a deliberate choice for political or environmental reasons.

I would close for seeing lack of car ownership in a profile (though, this saves you the trouble of wasting time with me.)

My first partner lacked a car, and it was a problem I will not repeat.

It might be a good idea to include in your profile interests which are not car-centered - for example, museums and restraurants, which are readily accessible, make sense while camping or skiing, which generally require driving, would not.
 
 
NYCguy is offline NYCguy Post #8  October 11,2010, 6:16am
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bklynsg wrote :
Hi everyone,

Hoping to get some opinions here -- think I should mention in my profile that I do not have a car?

I live right across the river from new york city, work in nyc, and do not have or need a car. It's not unusual for people in this area to go without one.

I ask because eHarmony is sending me quite a few matches who live in the suburbs, where one might need car. A lot of these places have train and/or bus service to the city.

One fellow who wrote to me said that were we to go out, he supposed he'd have to come pick me up (his words, not mine).

I haven't found a way to make the "match radius" any smaller than 30 miles. And for me, relying on mass transit is not a deal breaker, but I'm the one who doesn't have a car.

So whaddya think, put it in the profile or no? I never thought about it until I received the message with the remark about having to come to my neighborhood because I don't have a car . . .

Thanks!
S.
WOW. I lived in Jersey City, and I can't tell you the amount of times I have been rejected by women who viewed JC as a plane ride rather than a subway ride; or the Jersey women who "required" a man to have a car.

In any event, in the "additional information about..." area, mention that you spend most of your time in NYC (assuming this to be true). It pretty much removes the car issue from any of your NYC matches. Many guys in the burbs are predisposed to the need for a car, so it should not be an issue on their part.
 
 
tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #9  October 11,2010, 7:57am
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Not having a car is OK for dating for awhile, or a fling, but a relationship ain't gonna work. So either put it in your profile or go buy a car.
 
 
NYCguy is offline NYCguy Post #10  October 11,2010, 2:21pm
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tweet37 wrote :
Not having a car is OK for dating for awhile, or a fling, but a relationship ain't gonna work. So either put it in your profile or go buy a car.
Such a perspective may be appropriate if one lives in the burbs, but not necessary if one lives within a 20 min. train ride to a major metropolis like NYC, as is the case of the originator of this post.
Last edited by NYCguy; October 11,2010 at 2:35pm.
 
 
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