Just rewrote my profile! Can I get a review please?

Chris, Howell, NJ

The one thing Chris is most passionate about:

My passions are split between food and movies. I love to cook and am always eager to learn new techniques and try new recipes. I also enjoy eating at restaurants and especially love trying local favorites while on vacation. As for movies, I enjoy all kinds but have a soft spot for Quentin Tarantino, Kevin Smith, and IMAX theatres. Put together, dinner and a movie while snuggling on the couch with someone special is as good as it gets. ) The ending on this one is honest and interesting. I like it. I think you might want to edit down the path to get to it, though. It's a bit longer than it needs to be.

The most important thing Chris is looking for in a person is:

I am looking for somebody with a kind heart and a positive mind who desires not only to be loved, but also to return that love in equal measure. It's also important that my match is seeking a mature relationship based on open and honest communication, mutual understanding, and common goals for the future. This is useful and interesting, but a bit "vanilla". It could still work, it's just a little general. "A mature relationship based on open and honest communication", for instance. That's generic. "I'm looking for someone who isn't afraid to have hard conversations about mutual relationship goals, our feelings, children, etc." This is slightly more concrete. Well, if you were interested in those things. "A mature relationship" is also a thing. "Someone" implies a person. Look at this with a particular type of person in mind, and let your matches start envisioning themselves as that person.

* About Me

Basic Information
Occupation: Network Administrator
Age: 28
Height: 5' 6"
Wants Kids: Yes
Kids at Home: No
Ethnicity: White, non-Hispanic
Religion: Neither religious nor spiritual
Drinks: About once a week
Smokes: Never
I'm never really sure why we put these in to profiles for review. I can say that you're four years younger and the same height as me. Neither of which will work against you if my experience is any indication.

In my own words

The most influential person in Chris's life has been:

Among my small yet close group of friends, there is one person in particular who I rely on as a female perspective sounding board for my deepest thoughts and concerns. She never lets me forget that I'm regarded as a kind and caring person whose heart is in the right place. She reminds me that I'm valued because of my quirky personality, not in spite of it. Thanks to her and the others I've never felt happier or more comfortable being the person that I am, warts and all.
Devil's advocate here: is it possible a potential match might see your female friend as a potential threat and close you before they even began communication? Some of what you're describing are qualities that work in a good mate, too. You may want to keep this person in mind, but rewrite it so that its more generic and the woman above doesn't seem like competition.

The three things which Chris is most thankful for:

* My good friends.
* My great family.
* My overall good fortune and place in life.
Nicely done. You can also elaborate on these if you can keep it under 52 characters, although people have complained about my profile when I did that.

Three of Chris's best life-skills are:

* Using humor to make friends laugh
* Communicating my innermost thoughts and feelings
* Remaining calm yet resilient during a crisis
Good, but generic. Hmmm, how about something more like "Reminding friends there is laughter in the world"? "Sharing the parts of me that really matter"? Try playing with the phrases so you stand out a bit.

The one thing Chris wishes MORE people would notice about him is:

That in addition to my lighthearted and joking nature, I'm also an intellectually curious and imaginative geek who loves to ponder and explore the wonders of our world. I'm oftentimes a deep and thoughtful person who enjoys asking questions, listening to people, and solving problems in a logical, level headed fashion.
This is actually good as it is, I'm just wondering if you want to keep "geek" listed. It'll play with our age group, but you might weed out some of the women who see geek as comic relief instead of potential mate.

The things Chris can't live without are:

* Friends & Family (the people, not the phone plan)
* Laughter
* Good Food
* Fun tech (computer, iPhone, home theatre, etc)
* The close companionship of a significant other
God, I love the first one. Nice job. The description on the 4th one makes it clearer, it just comes out choppy though. Last one is either good, or a red flag, depends on the reader.

The first thing people notice about Chris is:

People notice my positive attitude and my knack for making others around me smile and laugh.
Short, sweet, good.

Some additional information Chris wanted you to know is:

I might as well get two small potential deal breakers out in the open. First, as mentioned above, I'm not religious. My match would need to be cool with the fact that I don't believe in god(s) and have no desire to go to church unless somebody's getting married or buried. That said, I have a Greek Orthodox background and still enjoy celebrating the major holidays. In fact, the Christmas season is one of my favorite times of the year. Second, I'm a liberal Democrat. Politics is only a minor interest of mine so it's not important that my match is mutually interested, so long as she isn't a polar opposite conservative either.
No. Do not mention religion or politics this early. Neither of these are really deal breakers if you find someone who matches you on all other points. (Well, within reason. "I'm a Born-Again Christian!" "I sacrifice babies to Satan!" Not happening there). It's okay with the first few sentences, but as soon as you mention a denomination you're setting yourself up for disaster. I don't even discuss these topics until several dates in, and I can see from her profile if we share a common faith or political leaning. Let her decide whether she likes you first, then introduce her to your politics or religious views.

My interests

Chris typically spends his leisure time:

I'll admit to having pretty typical interests in my spare time. I usually hang out with friends, stay in with a TV show or a movie, spend time on the computer, listen to music, or play a video game from time to time. Standard fare for a single guy in his 20's, but relaxing and enjoyable nonetheless.
This sounds boring. Which is unfortunate since the rest of the profile looks so fresh and interesting. Try to begin with "I enjoy..." and then describe things that a woman could see herself doing with you. "Curling up on the couch with a partner" for instance.

The last book Chris read and enjoyed:

Except for some books about food and cooking (Anthony Bourdain's being my favorites), the last fiction books I read were the Harry Potter series. Apart from the fantasy element , I enjoyed the focus on interpersonal struggles and character development. To me, that is what defines a good story. I have the same taste when it comes to movies. I enjoy special effects and explosions as much as the next guy, but I want some plot to go with it!
I like the last three lines, but work them in sooner. Also, get in a more active voice "What I believe makes a good story is plot and character development. My explosions and special effects had better come with a strong story."

According to my friends:

Chris's friends describe him as:

* Funny
* Kind
* Affectionate
* Thoughtful

The one thing Chris wishes MORE people would notice about him is:

That in addition to my lighthearted and joking nature, I'm also an intellectually curious and imaginative geek who loves to ponder and explore the wonders of our world. I'm oftentimes a deep and thoughtful person who enjoys asking questions, listening to people, and solving problems in a logical, level headed fashion.
This is actually good as it is, I'm just wondering if you want to keep "geek" listed. It'll play with our age group, but you might weed out some of the women who see geek as comic relief instead of potential mate.

Using the word "geek" was intentional, since that's what I am. My guess, for now, is that women who see the word geek and walk away laughing are looking for loud, obnoxious "Jersey Shore" style "manly men", so therefore we wouldn't be a good match anyway. I'd much rather date a woman with a bit of smarts herself who thinks geeks are sexy. )


The things Chris can't live without are:

* Friends & Family (the people, not the phone plan)
* Laughter
* Good Food
* Fun tech (computer, iPhone, home theatre, etc)
* The close companionship of a significant other
God, I love the first one. Nice job. The description on the 4th one makes it clearer, it just comes out choppy though. Last one is either good, or a red flag, depends on the reader.

Yeah, perhaps I was being a bit too honest there. I consider myself to be the thoughtful, romantic type and was looking to convey that a bit. I honestly do think that without that "special someone" there's something missing in my life, but I'd like to hear some more female feedback before I nix it.


Some additional information Chris wanted you to know is:

I might as well get two small potential deal breakers out in the open. First, as mentioned above, I'm not religious. My match would need to be cool with the fact that I don't believe in god(s) and have no desire to go to church unless somebody's getting married or buried. That said, I have a Greek Orthodox background and still enjoy celebrating the major holidays. In fact, the Christmas season is one of my favorite times of the year. Second, I'm a liberal Democrat. Politics is only a minor interest of mine so it's not important that my match is mutually interested, so long as she isn't a polar opposite conservative either.
No. Do not mention religion or politics this early. Neither of these are really deal breakers if you find someone who matches you on all other points. (Well, within reason. "I'm a Born-Again Christian!" "I sacrifice babies to Satan!" Not happening there). It's okay with the first few sentences, but as soon as you mention a denomination you're setting yourself up for disaster. I don't even discuss these topics until several dates in, and I can see from her profile if we share a common faith or political leaning. Let her decide whether she likes you first, then introduce her to your politics or religious views.

I had a feeling that section would spark some controversy around here. I used to have a bit mentioning my divorce there but decided to nix it because unlike religion and politics, it isn't a reflection of who I am but rather something that happened to me. I wasn't sure what information one was expected to put in the "Some additional info" section, so I thought I'd list some deal breakers. Sure, if I were to walk up to somebody cold those two subjects would not be in the first conversation, but in the context of a profile where one has a chance to think about it without being on the spot I thought it useful. Will it scare some people away? Sure. It was meant to. I honestly could not date a conservative nor could I date a regular churchgoer or somebody who would have a serious problem with me not being religious. Those two belief systems are too close to the core of one's personality and I've seen what happens when people get together who do not match at that level. Too much drama more times than not.

My interests

Chris typically spends his leisure time:

I'll admit to having pretty typical interests in my spare time. I usually hang out with friends, stay in with a TV show or a movie, spend time on the computer, listen to music, or play a video game from time to time. Standard fare for a single guy in his 20's, but relaxing and enjoyable nonetheless.
This sounds boring. Which is unfortunate since the rest of the profile looks so fresh and interesting. Try to begin with "I enjoy..." and then describe things that a woman could see herself doing with you. "Curling up on the couch with a partner" for instance.

Ah, but it IS boring. ) I live a pretty mundane "full time job, come home, eat, watch TV" life (which is pretty typical for a guy in his late 20's) and I don't see a way to really fluff that without being full of myself. The question DID as what I did in my leisure time, so there it is. Now if the question asked, if you had a girlfriend, what would you like to do in your spare time, that would be a different story. Or am I completely missing the point with this one?