Atticus7 is offline Atticus7 Post #1  June 8,2010, 10:14pm
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Subject says it all. I'm ignoring 50+ because there is no kind way to resolve otherwise, thanks to the recent changes.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #2  June 8,2010, 10:15pm
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Once you have archived you can close them.
 
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Atticus7 is offline Atticus7 Post #3  June 8,2010, 10:35pm
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wonders.

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AndieIsMe wrote :
Once you have archived you can close them.
Too cold. Not for people who seem basically reasonable, earnest, but who have. different interests/goals. My wish is not to slam the door, only to say thank you for stopping by and good luck.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #4  June 8,2010, 10:56pm
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You do realize that when you archive someone, they don't see it.

Closing someone is the best way to not leave someone wondering if you are just sitting on your thumb or a non paying member. Don't think of closing as being cold. They have other matches they can focus on.
 
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Matt1964 is offline Matt1964 Post #5  June 9,2010, 12:13am
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Atticus7 wrote :
Too cold. Not for people who seem basically reasonable, earnest, but who have. different interests/goals. My wish is not to slam the door, only to say thank you for stopping by and good luck.
I'm lost dude. Andieisme is totally right, close them.

They didn't 'stop by' at all, they were matched with you by a computer. What is there to "thank" them for, lol?
Wishing them 'good luck in their search' is about YOUR ego, not THEIR feelings. It is patting them on the head, feeling superior and saying 'sorry girlie, but you're just not up to my standards.' The chivalrous thing to do is just close them off and move on, silently.

Besides, the overwhelming majority are not paying members, so you couldn't communicate with them if your life depended on it.

Try this: send out 1st questions to the 50+. I'll be shocked if you get more then THREE who respond and probably two of those will be women with few options, so to speak. Probably 3/4 of the 50+ who are members already have YOU in their 'Archived' pile and you just don't know it. That's what eH does not want you to know, they want you to keep up false hope and the belief that you have great numbers of matches--when in reality you have very few.

It is all about eH's smoke and mirrors to make you think you have actual matches when in fact we have wasted our money--we have very, very few actual, viable matches and thus eH is NOT an effective place to meet a woman. It is a complete waste of time and money.
 
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elmenope is offline elmenope Post #6  June 9,2010, 6:50pm
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I thought there was an option to automatically move a match to your Archived tab if they archive you first.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #7  June 9,2010, 6:55pm
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If someone moves you to the archive tab on their account, you will never know. If they close you, they will move to your archive tab. Hope that helps.
 
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elmenope is offline elmenope Post #8  June 9,2010, 7:02pm
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Ah, thanks. I had several requests from matches that I archived but not closed and I wondered why.
 
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Atticus7 is offline Atticus7 Post #9  June 9,2010, 7:21pm
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Matt1964 wrote :
I'm lost dude
Agreed.
 
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