Am I not understanding the process?


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tim_the_enchanter is offline tim_the_enchanter Post #1  May 24,2010, 1:11am
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OK, here's my situation. I've been on EH for a couple of months now. From the beginning I've only been gatting A match every few days. Other threads say expand your range. My range already includes the entire Dallas/Ft Worth Metroplex. That is several million people! Some threads say to relax the standards of what I'm looking for. The matches I do get are already are nowhere close to what I am looking for. Yes, matching is on!

I have never received a reply from any match I have tried to make first contact with. No one has ever tried making first contact with me. I won't bother posting my profile. I've had 1 anonymous view in the past 2 weeks and a grand total of 6 views since I've been on EH. None of those were people I've tried to make contact with, so my problem is not my profile.

The ads make the site sound so grand, but I feel I might as well have been robbed at gunpoint.

Does anyone have a clue what the problem might be?
 
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kipty_29 is offline kipty_29 Post #2  May 24,2010, 1:50am
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i would expand your range to include the entire USA if you are having very lil luck, even include the UK, Canada and other English speaking countries.... who knows maybe the right match is not even in texas u know?
 
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Feasul is offline Feasul Post #3  May 24,2010, 2:13am
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Welcome to eHarmony. That's how it will remain unfortunately.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  May 24,2010, 6:25am
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Tim the number of matches you are receiving sounds extremely low. There have been occasions where the distance algorithm just does not understand where you live. My suggestion in that situation is to determine either by city / town name or ZIP code all of the areas you want to search for matches in. Then contact Customer Care and provide them with this information. They can put in those areas.

As for the lack of response, most (about 90%) of your matches are going to be non-paying members who can't respond. Most non-paying members are also non-active so they will not view or close you.

As for getting incompatible matches. Matching is based primarily on the 29 Dimensions of Compatibility. These are determined by the answers you provide when you fill out the Personality Profile Questionnaire. ALL of your matches will be compatible based on the 29 Dimensions. Your matches are then filtered by how you have set your settings under the Settings tab on your profile page. For most of the settings there is also an importance slider. It should be noted that the importance slider is not linear so moving just a bit off the Most Important setting may make the setting more broad than you will accept. If what you are finding incompatible in your matches is something that is in the settings the changing the setting or importance may fix that problem. If your points of incompatibility are related to their photos, you just don't find them attractive, then that is not part of either the matching process or the settings. If you feel you are incompatible based on values then it may be that you did not take the proper time to consider the questions when filling out the Questionnaire.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #5  May 24,2010, 6:32am
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kipty_29 wrote :
i would expand your range to include the entire USA if you are having very lil luck, even include the UK, Canada and other English speaking countries.... who knows maybe the right match is not even in Texas u know?
Two things. Just because you set your search area for a particular very large area, if the match has not also set their area to include your city then you still will not be matched. There also used to be a couple of settings related to long distance relationships. One was would you consider a long distance match that was willing to move for the relationship. The other was would YOU move for a relationship. These seem to be very important things to me if you are considering a LDR yet eHarmony has removed them from the settings.

Second thing is that the implication of your post is that you consider that each person has only one soul mate.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #6  May 24,2010, 6:55am
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tim_the_enchanter wrote :

I won't bother posting my profile.
Okie doke.

wrote :
Does anyone have a clue what the problem might be?
How would we??
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #7  May 24,2010, 7:28am

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tim_the_enchanter wrote :
OK, here's my situation. I've been on EH for a couple of months now. From the beginning I've only been gatting A match every few days. Other threads say expand your range. My range already includes the entire Dallas/Ft Worth Metroplex. That is several million people! Some threads say to relax the standards of what I'm looking for. The matches I do get are already are nowhere close to what I am looking for. Yes, matching is on!

I have never received a reply from any match I have tried to make first contact with. No one has ever tried making first contact with me. I won't bother posting my profile. I've had 1 anonymous view in the past 2 weeks and a grand total of 6 views since I've been on EH. None of those were people I've tried to make contact with, so my problem is not my profile.

The ads make the site sound so grand, but I feel I might as well have been robbed at gunpoint.

Does anyone have a clue what the problem might be?
women on these sites often won't make first contact.

either way, we can't tell if it's your profile, your pics, or what.
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #8  May 24,2010, 8:08am
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kipty_29 wrote :
i would expand your range to include the entire USA if you are having very lil luck, even include the UK, Canada and other English speaking countries.... who knows maybe the right match is not even in texas u know?
I think that's absurd. Certainly in a large metro area like DFW there should be matches for him.
 
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Sassafras54 is offline Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #9  May 24,2010, 8:13am
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Hi Tim!

You'd think in a big city 30 miles radius would do it, eh? I live in LA and found that 60 was much better. Remember at 30 you're not getting matched with someone who's 31 miles away. You could set it to 60 and close out everyone who's more than 45 or whatever.

It could be there's something in your profile that seems perfectly ok to you, but because of wording or something, people have a negative reaction to it. It's surprising how much that happens! Same with photos. Consider posting them here for review. Who knows? It might solve your problem quickly and easily.

Good luck!
 
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tim_the_enchanter is offline tim_the_enchanter Post #10  May 24,2010, 11:45am
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Like I said, I'm not getting anyone viewing me. 6 total views? Come on. I view every profile EH sends me. My preferances are set pretty broad. I've received 2 matches in the last week. I know there are more singles that are compatible than what I am receiving.
 
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