JeffVT03 is offline JeffVT03 Post #1  May 23,2010, 10:42am
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Please help me understand what I am doing wrong here? I have sent a few messages to some matches, and they always "close the match." I realize I am not Brad Pitt, but I feel like I have a lot to offer someone, and I am not hideous either. So, any advice would be appreciated here. I find it hard to believe that the majority of women are that shallow that they would simply close my match because of my pictures, however I really can't think of any other reason. Because if they actually took the time to talk to me, they might enjoy my personality and sense of humor. Thank you in advance for any suggestions.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #2  May 23,2010, 10:44am
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You may want to post your profile for feedback. See the sticky thread in the "Using eHarmony" forum for directions.

You can stomp your feet and insist "oh, if only they would talk to me", but the fact is that you have to navigate through the eH process and get to that first meeting. Your profile being the first step in that process.
 
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jussmile is offline jussmile Post #3  May 23,2010, 10:53am
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melman wrote :
You may want to post your profile for feedback. See the sticky thread in the "Using eHarmony" forum for directions.

You can stomp your feet and insist "oh, if only they would talk to me", but the fact is that you have to navigate through the eH process and get to that first meeting. Your profile being the first step in that process.
I agree with melman...

calling someone else "shallow" just because they are not attracted to you based on your pics and/or your profile, may not be a good approach. Maybe it isn't them... and it is you... or at least... how you're presenting yourself. we all come across individuals who we are interested in who are not interested in us... those are the breaks with online dating.

shoot... those are the breaks with dating period.
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #4  May 23,2010, 10:56am

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i second what Melman said.

chances are, there is something in your profile that are making women run in the other direction. it may just be something that needs to be reworded.
 
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JeffVT03 is offline JeffVT03 Post #5  May 23,2010, 11:01am
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Ok, fair enough. I will attempt to post my profile on here. Also, in regards to calling all women 'shallow", that was not my intent, I was simply trying to figure why not a single person was even talking to me.

The one thing Jeff is most passionate about: One thing that I thoroughly enjoy is hiking with my dog. There is just something peaceful and serene about walking through the woods on a cool fall day. I also enjoy being active outdoors, whether it be basketball, tennis or golf.



The most important thing Jeff is looking for in a person is: I am looking for someone who is open minded, who is kind and honest. I love to laugh and make people smile, so it's important that she has a great sense of humor and some wit.



Basic Information

Occupation: Financial Manager Age: 30 Height: 5' 10" Wants Kids: Maybe Kids at Home: No
Ethnicity: White, non-Hispanic Religion: Christian Drinks: Several times a week Smokes: Never




The three things which Jeff is most thankful for:

  • My family support system.
  • My dog, he's truly my best friend.
  • My sharp intellect.

Three of Jeff's best life-skills are:

  • Being a good friend and companion
  • Using humor to make friends laugh
  • Cooking for my family and friends


The one thing Jeff wishes MORE people would notice about him is:

I just wish people would look past my appearance and realize that I am very caring, intelligent and funny person. It can be frustrating at times when people don't give you a chance just based on your pictures.



The things Jeff can't live without are:

  • My dog
  • My Blackberry
  • My Jeep
  • Laptop
  • Sirius Radio

The first thing people notice about Jeff is:

That I tend to be shy at first, however once I get to know someone I open up rather quickly.



Jeff typically spends his leisure time:

I enjoy playing pool or sometimes Wii bowling with my family. Shooting hoops is very relaxing to me as well, as is going for a hike through the woods. I like to spend time with friends and family and just enjoy good conversation.


Jeff's friends describe him as:

  • Funny
  • Articulate
  • Caring
  • Intelligent
 
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JeffVT03 is offline JeffVT03 Post #6  May 23,2010, 11:03am
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I hope I did that correctly. And obviously, my current picture is my avatar as well. I appreciate any constructive criticism as well.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #7  May 23,2010, 11:09am
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You didn't read the directions. You posted in the wrong place.
Last edited by melman; May 23,2010 at 11:11am.
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #8  May 23,2010, 11:10am

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ok, I have three comments.

1. the sharp intellect... maybe a tad bit arrogant. maybe reword it. and get rid of "support system" and just leave "my family"

2. the whole "look past my appearance" sounds like you have low self esteem and that's not attractive. you don't know WHY these women are closing you out, but since you assume it's your pics, It's clearly something you are sensitive about. besides, you aren't a bad looking guy, and green is a good color on you.

3. you need a little more humor and flair in your profile. don't tell me you are funny- show me.

 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #9  May 23,2010, 11:11am

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melman wrote :
You didn't read the directions. You posted in the wrong place and the most important parts of the profile are missing.
I told you noone reads the stickys.
 
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JeffVT03 is offline JeffVT03 Post #10  May 23,2010, 11:13am
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Thank you Scarlett, I appreciate your feedback. I will work on re-wording some aspects.
 
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