He's on vacation. Should I wait?


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kermibly is offline kermibly Post #1  May 16,2010, 9:43am
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Here's my story: I just started Eh about a week ago. A guy wrote me because he was interested. He even asked me out, but I decided to wait at least a week. He still wrote me about every day for the past week, until he left. He said he wouldn't be back till Memorial day weekend, so does that mean I won't hear from him till then? It's been three days so far, but that's already unlike him. I have other people to communicate with, who seem just as interested, but I don't feel as excited about them as I did with this guy. What should I do: cut him some slack b/c he is with family or assume that he's not as interested as I thought he might have been? Like I said, I'm new to this process, so if I am making this out to be more dramatic then it probably is, forgive me. But please help me anyways. I'd appreciate it.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #2  May 16,2010, 9:49am
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That's a nice vacation he's got there!

I wouldn't worry about it at all, Go on with the other matches you're in communication with, and any new matches that come your way.
Last edited by TrekRyder10; May 16,2010 at 9:52am.
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #3  May 16,2010, 9:51am
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Give him a break. I seriously doubt he's going on vacation just to get away from you.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  May 16,2010, 10:07am
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He told you he was going on vacation until after Memorial Day so he did not poof on you. Unless you had exchanged phone numbers then he may not have access to his eHarmony and contacting you.

It costs you nothing to leave him open.

You should continue to communicate with any other matches that you have. This would be my advice even if he had not gone on vacation and was still communicating with you every day.

Since he had suggested meeting before he left on his vacation and you declined, in some ways you have sent a signal that you are not interested.
 
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JaJae is offline JaJae Post #5  May 16,2010, 11:03am
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I agree with the above. You aren't exclusive with him, no harm in continuing the process and seeing what else is out there while he is on vacation.
 
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nancymargritangelita is offline nancymargritangelita Post #6  May 16,2010, 11:14am
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Agree with everyone else - give him a break.

If he's not emailing you now, it's not because he's not interested anymore; it just means that he's on vacation and has chosen not to have access to a computer. He was emailing you every day until he said he was going on vacation. If he said he's going on vacation, he probably means he's going on vacation.

Give him some slack and wait until Memorial Day weekend is over; then start emailing him again. If he truly is interested, he'll email back.
 
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ravitaekwondo is offline ravitaekwondo Post #7  May 16,2010, 11:20am
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Hi OP,

Why did you decide to wait a week for a date after he asked you??

If you told him this, and gave no good reason, he probably got the feeling you are not interested in him. If so, he will probably poof.

Although each person's scenario varies greatly, sometimes you need "to strike when the iron is hot". To me, if a girl said she wants to wait, and gave no good reason (like work, family, etc.), I would assume she is not interested, and I would move on.

A date is just a date...there is nothing obligatory, and you do not have to spned a lot of $$$ to have a good time. If you don't hear from him, he's moved on.
 
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truthaboutcupid is offline truthaboutcupid Post #8  May 16,2010, 2:53pm
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kermibly wrote :
Here's my story: I just started Eh about a week ago. A guy wrote me because he was interested. He even asked me out, but I decided to wait at least a week. He still wrote me about every day for the past week, until he left. He said he wouldn't be back till Memorial day weekend, so does that mean I won't hear from him till then? It's been three days so far, but that's already unlike him. I have other people to communicate with, who seem just as interested, but I don't feel as excited about them as I did with this guy. What should I do: cut him some slack b/c he is with family or assume that he's not as interested as I thought he might have been? Like I said, I'm new to this process, so if I am making this out to be more dramatic then it probably is, forgive me. But please help me anyways. I'd appreciate it.
I say you fly down to where he is on vacation. Look him up...where he and his parents are staying. Follow them to a restaurant one night. Approach their table and demand answers, right there in the restaurant. If the parents start interrupting, tell them to BE QUIET, you are there for their son, not them. It's between you and him. When he doesn't give you a satisfactory answer on why he hasn't contacted you in THREE DAYS, pull out your IPad, log onto eH, and proceed to close him out right there in front of him. Then say, "Happy bleepin' vacation!" and storm out.

I think that would send a strong message and would not come off as the least bit psycho. OR......you could do what the first few posters said and just wait for him and continue to pursue other matches in the meantime. If no email after Memorial Day, you will have your answer.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #9  May 16,2010, 3:24pm
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ravitaekwondo wrote :
Why did you decide to wait a week for a date after he asked you??

If you told him this, and gave no good reason, he probably got the feeling you are not interested in him. If so, he will probably poof.
This is essentially the point I was trying to make in her other thread of the exact same topic.

Also, he's on vacation and at this point you haven't even met, so you can't expect him to put down his vacation to keep communicating with you. There are a lot of people that don't bring their computers with them on vacation or if they do, they don't spend as much time on the computer.
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #10  May 16,2010, 9:14pm
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truthaboutcupid wrote :
I say you fly down to where he is on vacation. Look him up...where he and his parents are staying. Follow them to a restaurant one night. Approach their table and demand answers, right there in the restaurant. If the parents start interrupting, tell them to BE QUIET, you are there for their son, not them. It's between you and him. When he doesn't give you a satisfactory answer on why he hasn't contacted you in THREE DAYS, pull out your IPad, log onto eH, and proceed to close him out right there in front of him. Then say, "Happy bleepin' vacation!" and storm out.
It would be even more creepily effective if he found her in his room one night after getting back from dinner, and then she pulled this stunt... preferably a night with lots of thunder and lightning.

For full effect, turn off the power and cut the phone lines before he arrives.
 
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