WomanDating is offline WomanDating Post #1  April 28,2010, 1:56pm
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I know the most common answer is going to be "when you're comfortable" but seriously girls, how many dates (typically/generally) does it take before you let him come to your house to pick you up for a date?

I'd typically say that at least 3 for me, sometimes more.
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #2  April 28,2010, 2:01pm
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WomanDating wrote :
I'd typically say that at least 3 for me, sometimes more.
How's that working for you?

If someone is not comfortable with me picking her up for a date, I'm not comfortable paying her way. That doesn't mean I expect her to invite me in, but I would find it creepy of her if we had already been out together.

I'm not talking about a first meeting, which I don't count as a date.

If you want to meet for coffee 3 or 4 times, I can work with that.
 
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Tipitina is offline Tipitina Post #3  April 28,2010, 2:13pm
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Generally I've let the guy pick me up at my house for the second date (so the first one after the initial meet/greet). By that time, I've had enough conversations with him to know if I feel comfortable with him, or not.

Haven't had any problems arise from this approach.

(BTW, I don't have any kids. Just an overprotective cat.)
Last edited by Tipitina; April 28,2010 at 3:19pm. Reason: additional info
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #4  April 28,2010, 2:24pm
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at my house? a month or more. and again, most of the time it doesnt get that far
 
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WomanDating is offline WomanDating Post #5  April 28,2010, 2:31pm
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mrflyer wrote :
How's that working for you?

If someone is not comfortable with me picking her up for a date, I'm not comfortable paying her way. That doesn't mean I expect her to invite me in, but I would find it creepy of her if we had already been out together.

I'm not talking about a first meeting, which I don't count as a date.

If you want to meet for coffee 3 or 4 times, I can work with that.
Actually Mr.Flyer it's working well. I have kids at home that I need to protect and I guess I would definitely be more open minded once they are older. But, you give me food for thought, maybe I need to loosen up in that area.

Oh and I always offer to go dutch on my dates, always.
 
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charmed59 is online now charmed59 Post #6  April 28,2010, 3:10pm
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About the time you give them your full name, they know where you live. They might pretend they don't, but in this age of the internet, if they want to know, they do.

Inviting them there, on the other hand. I have a daughter at home. I tend to fall into the "I don't want them meeting my daughter until I know it's serious." So, it depends on when it gets serious.
 
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psgcooldog is online now psgcooldog Post #7  April 28,2010, 6:55pm
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WomanDating wrote :
I know the most common answer is going to be "when you're comfortable" but seriously girls, how many dates (typically/generally) does it take before you let him come to your house to pick you up for a date?

I'd typically say that at least 3 for me, sometimes more.
Whoa! It would bother me to be so mistrusted. In my POF profile I used to have some words to the effect that with my houseconcert series, I could not really be anonymous even if I wanted to, since there's video of me, my house, my ex, etc, etc, etc out on the web. My phone number, and certainly my address too, if you dig just a bit. Newspaper and magazine stories with my full name, etc.

I figure that that kind of openness should be met with trust, and for the most part it has been. Two first dates were me making dinner here before heading out for some entertainment, and one actually had my date staying in the guest room, because the logistics of her driving home that night would have just been nuts. I only chased her around the living room a few times ...

And no, I don't think I have a "trustworthy face" LOL!
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #8  April 28,2010, 9:12pm
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WomanDating wrote :
I have kids at home that I need to protect
How many of your dates have tried to harm the kids?
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #9  April 28,2010, 9:43pm
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I always drive separately to the first date/meet. If that goes well enough that we're going to go out again, depending on where we're going, logistics for getting there & parking, etc., I will either drive myself again or let him pick me up.

Like was said above, by that point he has my full name, etc., and can figure out where I live if he wants. If he does pick me up at home, if my kids are home I will generally just come out to meet him out front... I don't invite him in as I do have my rule about not introducing a guy to my kids until a long-term relationship potential is established and/or about 3 months.
 
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