vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #1  April 17,2010, 10:21am
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forgive my ignorance here, but how can I get feedback on how to improve my profile?

Do I link to each of the workshop threads in the sticky above or is there a way to link to my profile.

I'm a little concerned about my writing skills. I went to Georgia Tech and I'm a scientist - I spend a good deal of my time alone - so I am concerned about how I am portraying myself. I'm actually very fun loving when I'm comfortable with people. I am, however, insecure about how I photograph and know men are visual. Sans plastic surgery, i think brushing up on my profile statements and maybe some *gentle* guidance in which pics to post are the way I should go forward.

All that to say....

a) follow individual workshop links

or

b) is there individual help I can get on this forum - a way to link over or post my profile.

thanks!
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #2  April 17,2010, 10:24am
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You can copy and paste your profile in a topic on here. That's probably the best way to go if you are concerned about your profile as a whole.
 
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vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #3  April 17,2010, 10:34am
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thanks, Ill do that for my profile

What about the picture critique *gulp*?
 
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vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #4  April 17,2010, 10:43am
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The one thing Valerie is most passionate about: Making sure my child has the best life possible. I am passionate about everything in my life - my work, my friends, my family and the relationships I have. I'm an educated woman who is proud of her accomplishments because they contribute to global public health, but I will always put the people in my life above work. I think attitude is half the battle for most things in life, how you treat others is the other half. Maintaining a positive attitude and laughing when life hits you hard is something I do well and feel strongly about

Making sure my child has the best life possible. I am passionate about everything in my life - my work, my friends, my family and the relationships I have. I'm an educated woman who is proud of her accomplishments because they contribute to global public health, but I will always put the people in my life above work. I think attitude is half the battle for most things in life, how you treat others the other half. Maintaining a positive attitude and laughing when life hits you hard is something I do well and feel strongly about.


The most important thing Valerie is looking for in a person is: Intelligent, strong, always reaching for the stars with their feet on the ground. I need a man comfortable expressing his affection - verbal and non verbal. Someone who will get in the car and just *go* - the Okeefenokee (really beautiful), the mountains (Tallulah Gorge), you know, just go somewhere. Would it be too greedy to want someone who shares my love of hockey?? Its an odditity here in Atlanta, but I love it!

Intelligent, strong, always reaching for the stars with their feet on the ground. I need a man comfortable expressing his affection - verbal and non verbal. Someone who will get in the car and just *go* - the Okeefenokee (really beautiful), the mountains (Tallulah Gorge), you know, just go somewhere. Would it be too greedy to want someone who shares my love of hockey?? Its an odditity here in ATL, but I really love it.






Basic Information Occupation: microbiologist Age: 38 Height: 5' 10" Wants Kids: Maybe
Ethnicity: White, non-Hispanic Religion: Christian Drinks: Never Smokes: Never

In my own words

The most influential person in Valerie's life has been:

Sherri. You always know when to call, when to reach out, when to hug me, when to kick me in my behind, you are selfless to the end.


The three things which Valerie is most thankful for:

  • My daughter
  • My relationship with God
  • My family

Three of Valerie's best life-skills are:

  • Raising and/or caring for children
  • Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things
  • Helping those who are less fortunate or in need


The one thing Valerie wishes MORE people would notice about her is:

I don't know. You tell me what you notice, I'll tell you what I wished you would have noticed.....(that's a joke by the way). I wish people would notice that I'm genuine and they can approach me without fear :-)


The things Valerie can't live without are:

  • my child
  • my God
  • kindness
  • communication and understanding
  • love


The first thing people notice about Valerie is:

People find me intimidating. I'm tall and have light eyes that look straight at you. I'm honest and quite direct with people. It can be intimidating I guess. However, I am unfalteringly conscious of people's feelings and never hurt someone on purpose - ever.


Some additional information Valerie wanted you to know is:

I adore smart / nerdy men. I find it very attractive if you know more calculus, computer languages, physics than me. A little something odd I picked up in my 6yr stint at Georgia Tech. I am a Techie, but I'm tolerant of others - even Dawgs *lol* I like having someone to have an intellectual conversation as well as just hang out and watch hockey. speakin I really would love it if someone liked going to hockey games. My girlfriends don't like going to Thrasher games and I love it!! I also like watching the Braves, but much prefer to go to the actual game or even just go to the park to watch softball.


My interests

Valerie typically spends her leisure time:

I like to get in the car and just "go". Find something to explore. For example, just go to the North GA mountains and find some out of the way stream to explore or rock slide down. Those are the best weekends to me. Those that are not planned and you explore nature, maybe learn a thing or two.... If there are museums available in the town I am in, I love to get lost in them. These are all things I like to do, but most of the time I am with my daughter. We will go to a park, a children's museum, go to a movie or out to eat. She brings joy to my heart and a smile to my face.

The last book Valerie read and enjoyed:

I'll keep that a mystery. I read so much that its hard to mention just one. They are, outside of science journals, etc., mostly historical or historical fiction. I can't be all serious all the time. Everyone has to lighten up sometimes or you just can't survive this world


According to my friends:

Valerie's friends describe her as:

  • Spiritual
  • Genuine
  • Passionate
  • Intelligent
Last edited by vds4_cdc; April 17,2010 at 11:05am. Reason: missing text from copy and paste function - replaced text
 
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redwine99999 is offline redwine99999 Post #5  April 17,2010, 11:32am
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Dear Valerie,
My daughter is studying to become a biolgical engineer, so, I felt I had to help you out. I'm a 49 year old woman with 2 master's degrees, and have been divorced and dating 10 years.

Read into that whatever you want!

Anyway, first off, I know you're being sincere, and all, but you need a photo without the daughter. He doesn't want to date your daughter. I know she's there, but don't put her out there to represent you.

Also, mention her once in your profile and then delete all other mentions: You don't appear to really be ready for a man in your life if all you talk about is your daughter.

You need to say something positive about men, about your comfort level meeting new people, that you're already dating and enjoying your single life. Men need you to be "date ready." Your profile says "Can I cut up your peanut butter and jelly sandwich for you while you watch cartoons?"

Try to find a way to let the woman speak, rather than the mother and scientist. That doesn't mean being overtly pushy or sexual, just more hot and available. That can be suggesting activities that a man can also share and enjoy with you. It matters that you know how to enjoy yourself, because men are terrified they can't keep you entertained. Also, definitely list some books, films, music you like. Keeping mysteries is a red flag to a man. He reads that as "She's confused or always hiding something." They read their own psyche into what you write, so, that isn't going to help you. Give them some way to feel that they know you a little bit. Show a pop culture side to balance out the scientist. Appear approachable.

Does that help?

Sue
 
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melman is offline melman Post #6  April 17,2010, 11:47am
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vds4_cdc wrote :
The one thing Valerie is most passionate about: Making sure my child has the best life possible. I am passionate about everything in my life - my work, my friends, my family and the relationships I have. I'm an educated woman who is proud of her accomplishments because they contribute to global public health, but I will always put the people in my life above work. I think attitude is half the battle for most things in life, how you treat others is the other half. Maintaining a positive attitude and laughing when life hits you hard is something I do well and feel strongly about
As everyone knows, I put a lot of weight on the answer to this question. It needs to focus on ONE thing... that one thing which really defines who you are. You have listed several things. Keep the focus on one actual, specific thing... and move the rest to the "other stuff you want your matches to know" section.

The same thing applies to the "the most important thing you are looking for" question. One thing. Not a list of requirements.

There is too much mention of your child throughout the profile. Now obviously this is your passion and that's fine. But you've over-done it.

"People find me intimidating" is not going to encourage anyone to communicate with you. I'm sure you can find something more positive to talk about there.
 
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vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #7  April 17,2010, 2:29pm
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thanks y'all! I will edit and repost.

I guess its pretty obvious I'm a MOM. I didn't realize that's all that came thru. I'm much more than that, but I'm pretty much a caretaker - however I am NOT looking to be any man's mommy. Been there - done that.. NO thank you.

maybe I'm too nice, good southern girl and all.

frustrating.

I'm gonna try and again in a little bit and repost it.

I really appreciate the help. I didn't even THINK about those things
 
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vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #8  April 17,2010, 3:22pm
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The one thing Valerie is most passionate about:


I absolute adore what I do for a living! It is nothing but pure fun and it contributes to public health, so bonus! I have been able to use my knowledge to go great places, work global outbreaks (SARS for one, I was still at CDC), meet great people and get involved in my church's mission to Haiti by contributing my knowledge of water systems and potability! Its just fun stuff and my face always lights up when I talk about it.

Last edited by vds4_cdc; April 17,2010 at 3:26pm. Reason: text got mixed up
 
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vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #9  April 17,2010, 3:26pm
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The most important thing Valerie is looking for in a person is: Intelligence and strength of character
 
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vds4_cdc is offline vds4_cdc Post #10  April 17,2010, 3:27pm
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Basic Information

Occupation: microbiologist Age: 38 Height: 5' 10" Wants Kids: Maybe
Ethnicity: White, non-Hispanic Religion: Christian Drinks: Never Smokes: Never

In my own words

The most influential person in Valerie's life has been:

Sherri. You always know when to call, when to reach out, when to hug me, when to kick me in my behind, you are selfless to the end.


The three things which Valerie is most thankful for:

  • My daughter
  • My relationship with God
  • My family

Three of Valerie's best life-skills are:

  • Creating romance in a relationship
  • Helping those who are less fortunate or in need
  • Finding and taking on challenging activities


The one thing Valerie wishes MORE people would notice about her is:

that I am unfailingly kind


The things Valerie can't live without are:

  • my child
  • my God
  • kindness
  • communication and understanding
  • love


The first thing people notice about Valerie is:

my passion for life and everything I do! It comes shining right on thru


Some additional information Valerie wanted you to know is:

I adore smart / nerdy men. I find it very attractive if you know more calculus, computer languages, physics than me. A little something odd I picked up in my 6yr stint at Georgia Tech. I am a Techie, but I'm tolerant of others - even Dawgs *lol* I like having someone to have an intellectual conversation as well as just hang out and watch hockey. I really would love it if someone liked going to hockey games. My girlfriends don't like going to Thrasher games and I love it!! I also like watching the Braves, but much prefer to go to the actual game or even just go to the park to watch softball.


My interests

Valerie typically spends her leisure time:

I like to get in the car and just "go". Find something to explore. For example, just go to the North GA mountains and find some out of the way stream to explore or rock slide down. Those are the best weekends to me. Those that are not planned and you explore nature, maybe learn a thing or two....

The last book Valerie read and enjoyed:

Sarum by Edward Rutherford. It tells the history of Salisbury England thru time since Stonehenge to WWII using a ficitious family tree traced thru time. It was a very different format from other historical fiction I like to read, but very good.


According to my friends:

Valerie's friends describe her as:

  • Spiritual
  • Genuine
  • Passionate
  • Intelligent
 
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