at the e-mail stages of e-harmony


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TK50 is offline TK50 Post #1  April 14,2010, 5:07pm
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Hi,
Unsure what to do next. We now are in the e-mail stages of E-harmony.Should I wait for him to initiate the conversation on E-harmony. I don't want to seem eager to talk. I wanted to know about him. He has not disclosed some of his profile.
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #2  April 14,2010, 7:27pm
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if you are interested in someone- express interest. if no one expresses interest but each waits for the other, nothing will ever happen.

and if he has not yet completed his profile but you have questions, feel free to ask one or two. but do not bombard the person with questions. drop him an email. say hi. explain a little about yourself and ask an easy introductory question.

easy!

good luck and welcome to the boards.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #3  April 15,2010, 4:19am
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The more you wait around, the better chance a competitor will come in and get things going.
 
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Sassafras54 is offline Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #4  April 15,2010, 12:14pm
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Isn't it true that in EHarmony Mail, the system still controls "who goes next"? If it's your turn, you have to go next; if it's not, you have to wait.

Not sure about this though ... can't remember how it works.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #5  April 15,2010, 12:41pm
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Sassafras54 wrote :
Isn't it true that in EHarmony Mail, the system still controls "who goes next"? If it's your turn, you have to go next; if it's not, you have to wait.

Not sure about this though ... can't remember how it works.
Only the first initial email sent by each party, After that it's all systems go!

To the OP: If you intiated the first communication. Then he cannot send an email until you do.
Last edited by TrekRyder10; April 15,2010 at 12:44pm.
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #6  April 15,2010, 2:59pm
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TrekRyder10 wrote :
Only the first initial email sent by each party, After that it's all systems go!

To the OP: If you intiated the first communication. Then he cannot send an email until you do.
See, that isnt clear. I know the first time in oc (he initiated) I had no clue what was next. He closed me two days later saying I had put him on hold.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #7  April 15,2010, 3:10pm
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There does need to be some clearer language on the OC start pages that states that the other party cannot contact you until you send that message. There is already so much else to read on those pages it is understandable why people fall off during OC or the step just before that.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  April 16,2010, 8:06am
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When you have completed the Guided Communication process and reach the Open Communication (eHarmony Mail) whoever initiated the First Questions will have to send the first e-mail message. Once the other person responds then the OC process will allow either person to send an e-mail at any time.

As to those that think this is not clear I will point out that there is a red button on the right side of each match that says what the next step that you should take is whenever it is your turn. When you have both exchanged Second Questions the red button will say "Read Safety Tips". Once you have read the safety tips at the bottom of that page there is a red button that says "Continue". Clicking on that button will open up the eHarmony Mail page where you can write a message and then CLICK ON THE SEND BUTTON. If you chose to read the safety tips but did not send the first message then the red button next to the matches name on your Communicating tab would say "Send (him / her) an eHarmony Mail.

Seems pretty clear to me, eHarmony is telling you what YOU need to do next every step of the way. Anytime you see a red button next to a match, click on it and do whatever it says you should do.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #9  April 20,2010, 2:21pm
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I can honestly say eH does NOT make it clear for every step. When you try to fast track, there is nothing there that says you can't revert back to GC. It's the fact that the programmers and other people who work for eH cannot use the system that makes it harder to use with every "upgrade". They don't see it in action.

BTW, I am very computer savvy. I am the one who gets bored in computer program classes and skips ahead to learn the next chapter while the teacher is still teaching.

As with any position where you don't actually use what you are creating, you need a test group and actually listen to their feedback. Sometimes even bringing them into the process and doing an update that doesn't go live until all the bugs are out.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #10  April 20,2010, 2:47pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :
I can honestly say eH does NOT make it clear for every step. When you try to fast track, there is nothing there that says you can't revert back to GC. It's the fact that the programmers and other people who work for eH cannot use the system that makes it harder to use with every "upgrade". They don't see it in action.
Andie.. This is what you see when you request eHarmony mail..

Please write a short message to AndieISMe. If AndieIsMe accepts your message, this will be the first message in eHarmony Mail.

Some members prefer to stay in Guided Communication so don't be discouraged if AndieIsMe rejects this offer. You will still be able to continue through our Guided Communication process.

Learn about Communication on eHarmony is on every profile
eHarmony provides two choices for getting to know your match in a safe and anonymous environment. It's up to you to choose whether you'd like to go through the Guided Communication steps or skip them and go directly to eHarmony Mail.. This even goes through what all the stages mean.


I think we tend to overlook a lot of things the site provides.
Last edited by TrekRyder10; April 20,2010 at 2:53pm.
 
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