fes808 is offline fes808 Post #1  December 22,2009, 6:41pm
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Ok so i know im not a total loser, ive had plenty of women in my life and never really had a problem approaching them or starting conversations. i wanted to try this to see if i could weed out the bad matches and maybe skip to finding a few good ones that i could make a decision about. problem is..i cant get a response from anyone! never had a communication request from anyone else. ive followed all the advice...tried just normal "guided communication" questions and tried a few brief emails containing my own honest questions...and keep getting the same thing. closed notice or no response. even tried sending questions to matches that im probably not even interested in just to see if i get a response. plenty of matches and not a single communication. tried ice breakers too...and just getting frustrated. followed tips on how to get more matches, updated my cants/must haves, uploaded some new pics, edited for grammar and such....and still nothing. never been this frustrated with meeting girls in real life. any suggestions?
 
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DDjr is offline DDjr Post #2  December 23,2009, 6:08pm
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Welcome to EH & EHA!

First, you need to understand that some of your matches are not paying members so they can't respond to your request for communications anyway.

Second, it's unclear from what you wrote if you are initiating communications with your matches. Send Short Questions! (Don't try to Fast Track.) Send SQ to basically ALL your matches!

Third, unfortunately EH doesn't have a storeroom full of "perfect matches". We all have to suffer through periods when it seems like no one is going to respond to us. It's just part of the process.

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EH can be incredibly frustrating! You have to understand that the process is probably going to takes months if not years. Don't expect a quick fix (and any one particular match to respond to you).

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You might consider posting your profile here for a Profile Review.
 
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fes808 is offline fes808 Post #3  December 23,2009, 7:00pm
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Thanks for the advice. just not really interested in paying for a service this dissapointing in long term. anyways i do send short questions to basically all my matches (even ones im really not even interested in) and all of them are paying customers. to my knowledge as long as they have a photo up theyre able to respond, correct? the only response i ever get is "closed communication". maybe i am to impatient, or this just isnt for me. wish there was just a trial membership for cheaper than sixty bucks. half the responses i got from craigslist were fake, but at least i got some feedback...
 
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shoopthedoop is offline shoopthedoop Post #4  December 23,2009, 7:19pm
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fes808 wrote :
Thanks for the advice. just not really interested in paying for a service this dissapointing in long term. anyways i do send short questions to basically all my matches (even ones im really not even interested in) and all of them are paying customers. to my knowledge as long as they have a photo up theyre able to respond, correct? the only response i ever get is "closed communication". maybe i am to impatient, or this just isnt for me. wish there was just a trial membership for cheaper than sixty bucks. half the responses i got from craigslist were fake, but at least i got some feedback...
Just out of interest's sake, how long have you been on eH and how many total matches are we talking about?
 
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BrickWallsBreak is offline BrickWallsBreak Post #5  December 23,2009, 7:57pm
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Based on the 300 matches I had in 3 months, I'd say only about 20% were alive ... real ... still active.

The rest are free communication weekend people (who disappear after 4 days), people no longer active or never, ever check their eH or e-mail ... or who maybe died in real life ... or met someone already.

For some reason, eH also seems to have an exponetial number or FAT women. Sorry to all you ladies carrying an extra 50 pounds ... my comment is not directly aimed at you and your problems keeping in shape after 40.
 
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shoopthedoop is offline shoopthedoop Post #6  December 23,2009, 8:00pm
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BrickWallsBreak wrote :
Based on the 300 matches I had in 3 months, I'd say only about 20% were alive ... real ... still active.
You got responses of some kind, even if it was just being closed, from 20% of your matches? Wow, that's a pretty good response rate.

BrickWallsBreak wrote :
For some reason, eH also seems to have an exponetial number or FAT women. Sorry to all you ladies carrying an extra 50 pounds ... my comment is not directly aimed at you and your problems keeping in shape after 40.
Wow, dude get ready to be slammed over that one.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #7  December 23,2009, 8:13pm

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Oh no....not the "F" word!!!
 
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Shelby is offline Shelby Post #8  December 24,2009, 7:46am
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BrickWallsBreak wrote :

For some reason, eH also seems to have an exponetial number or FAT women. Sorry to all you ladies carrying an extra 50 pounds ... my comment is not directly aimed at you and your problems keeping in shape after 40.
Brave words typed from some one, who apparently is not having any success with the NON_FAT ladies on EH.
 
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Tipitina is offline Tipitina Post #9  December 24,2009, 7:54am
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BrickWallsBreak wrote :
For some reason, eH also seems to have an exponetial number or FAT women. Sorry to all you ladies carrying an extra 50 pounds ... my comment is not directly aimed at you and your problems keeping in shape after 40.
Funny, one might say the same about number of bald men. But I wouldn't say that. Not at all.
 
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NYCpigeon is online now NYCpigeon Post #10  December 24,2009, 8:35am
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BrickWallsBreak wrote :
Based on the 300 matches I had in 3 months, I'd say only about 20% were alive ... real ... still active.

The rest are free communication weekend people (who disappear after 4 days), people no longer active or never, ever check their eH or e-mail ... or who maybe died in real life ... or met someone already.

For some reason, eH also seems to have an exponetial number or FAT women. Sorry to all you ladies carrying an extra 50 pounds ... my comment is not directly aimed at you and your problems keeping in shape after 40.
Let's set the record straight. (disclaimer: I weigh 130 lb./5'5") Overweightness is a societal issue. NOT an eHarmony issue. The average American is 24 lbs. heavier today than the average American was in the 1970's. This includes men, women, and children. There are 9 million obese American children. Western societies have enjoyed relatively cheap modern conveniences, an inexpensive food supply, and a job market/work demands that leaves little time for exercise coupled with "exponential" levels of stress.

P.S.: Your disclaimer will not protect you from being fairly pummeled.
 
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