Closing Your Matches - What Does "Other" Mean?


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linsee is offline linsee Post #321  June 6,2009, 7:56am
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For me, 'other' usually just means, that the person in general (photo and profile) is just not even close to my type. Maybe a great, nice guy for someone else, but to start corresponding the then cutting them off later seems like a more cruel way to go and vice versa for myself. I have also stated 'other' when the first correspondence from someone who has his profile full of family man photos (grandkids, etc) and then sent every question(5) ALL physical/passionate/affectionate related. I didn't pay eharmony to troll the internet for bed partners. There should be an option for 'sleasebag'.
I have a different prospective when it comes to someone saying 'i don' t feel there's any chemistry' when you haven't even looked at their profile yet...this is an example where 'other' would be more appropriate...it's just a dig to say 'i don't like the look of you'. Is that what a gentleman or lady would do?
Anyway....good luck to us all. We are going to need it!
 
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vintage_63 is offline vintage_63 Post #322  June 6,2009, 7:11pm
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As a 45 year old woman who has never had any children, at this point in my life, I am not open to starting a family and I can't say that I'm really interested in being a step parent. While I have indicated in my settings that would prefer not to be matched with men who have children under 18, the majority of my matches have children that they usually mention in the "about me" portion of their profile. Those matches get an immediate close and "other" is the best reason that fits in that instance.
 
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Robert_inSD is offline Robert_inSD Post #323  June 29,2009, 6:02pm
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Although all kind of animals and I get along fine, and I do enjoy pets, I am highly allergic to cats.  Closing with a reason of "Because of statements in your profile", although technically accurate, is too easily misinterpreted.
What do folks think should be clicked?  "Other" is so vague, but at least not a lie. 
(Yes, my own profile does list this health issue.  I just never know if a new match has read the full profile, and the room for additional information is at the bottom of that web form.)
 
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thedarknite is offline thedarknite Post #324  June 30,2009, 12:14am
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I think "other" just makes people insecure about their looks. Because that's what everybody thinks when they see that. "I guess they thought I was ugly or too overweight.
I think they should leave it but add an option to write whatever you want too. Because some people use "other" to close and they don't necessarily mean looks. This option could be helpful. Maybe someone closes someone because of misspelling. If they had the option to write that, then the closee can fix that particular problem.
 
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avinash is offline avinash Post #325  June 30,2009, 7:48am
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I wouldn't mind getting more descriptive responses myself, i'd like to know more about why I get closed out, who knows, it could be something about myself that I could improve. And if somene says something derogatory or insulting, I'm adult enough to not let it bother me for very long.
 
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FaintestInkling is offline FaintestInkling Post #326  June 30,2009, 3:32pm
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merry474747 is offline merry474747 Post #327  July 12,2009, 4:54pm
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who cares why a random person you've never met didn't want to get romantically involved with you? they don't really need to justify it. there's one reason people close a match- they're not interested. what are you going to do, try to please everyone who sees your profile? the point is to find someone who meshes with your distinct personality- it's not an ad. just move on to the next- people are taking this stuff way too personally.
 
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Ladama is offline Ladama Post #328  August 1,2009, 4:29pm
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I think perhaps a person doesn't want to hurt another's feelings by selecting other reasons such as "no chemistry" etc. Other can a be a "catch all" reason.
 
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laurenashely is offline laurenashely Post #329  August 7,2009, 2:19pm
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Seriously...with the exception of the "Because this match never responded to my communication and Because we are communicating outside of Eharmony" you may as well just label every thing else "Im just not that into you." Because of ALL of these reasons, not a single one wouldnt be overlooked if your match was into you and felt that spark of chemistry
 
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GreatGuy38 is offline GreatGuy38 Post #330  August 7,2009, 2:56pm

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laurenashely wrote :
Seriously...with the exception of the "Because this match never responded to my communication and Because we are communicating outside of Eharmony" you may as well just label every thing else "Im just not that into you." Because of ALL of these reasons, not a single one wouldnt be overlooked if your match was into you and felt that spark of chemistry
For the most part, I agree with LaurenAshely, with two exceptions. I often select “other” when a match doesn’t include enough information in their profile. I would be nice if eHarmony had an option which would say something to the effect of: “Based on insufficient information, I’m not interested in this match.” The majority of matches I receive, in their profile they’ll leave most of the questions blank, in addition to multiple typos. But, then again this might be interpreted as an inadvertent way of letting me know that the match is not a good fit. I won’t reply to a match unless they have taken the time to create a thoughtful profile.
 
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