MarchHare is offline MarchHare Post #1  November 5,2009, 11:27am
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So I just started using eharmony as a registered user this past weekend, and I already have some matches that really catch my interest. Good news!

I just have one question though, usually how long do people find it takes for a response to your first questions? Hours? Days? Are weekends usually better?
 
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Sassafras54 is online now Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  November 5,2009, 1:21pm
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Hi March Hare! welcome to eH.

There's a really wide variation in response times ... anywhere from hours to weeks. A large % of matches never respond; don't take it personally ... that's everyone's experience.

I do seem to get more activity Sunday evenings! ... perhaps the weekend didn't work out well?

Good luck!
 
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bob819 is offline bob819 Post #3  November 5,2009, 1:49pm
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How do you sway a match who thinks you live to far to start a relationship,when evey thing else is good
 
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beenaroundtheblockafewtimes is offline beenaroundtheblockafewtimes Post #4  November 5,2009, 2:27pm
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Yep, welcome to EHarmony. Y'know, some people aren't chained to their computers. Personally, I am. (I work on mine!) But, the answer to this is, "It varies." I guess the real question is, "How long are YOU willing to wait for an answer?" I think a week would do it for me. If they don't answer within that timeframe, they probably aren't interested.
 
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Iconography is offline Iconography Post #5  November 5,2009, 2:59pm
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If the match is really not looking for a LDR (long-distance relationship), or isn't open to the idea, there really isn't anything you can do, I don't think, except be a once-in-a-lifetime/too-good-to-let-get-away catch. In a case like that, everything else has to be better than just "good."

This was sort of the case with my current match. He was really not looking for a long-distance match, since a previous LDR had broken up, but I looked sufficiently more-than-interesting for him to reconsider.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #6  November 5,2009, 4:10pm
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Most of your matches are not active customers. They will never respond to communication or even view your profile. Good luck.
 
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test_pattern is offline test_pattern Post #7  November 5,2009, 8:31pm
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Take it easy. You've gotta be part of EH for a while to understand it's rhythms (some take weeks b/c they have matches in the "queue", other take months b/c they're in a relationship that eventually breaks up, others take hrs b/c they're actively looking). Take it easy and grow thick skin. You never know how it will all play out, and what the circumstance is of the person responding (maybe they're on vaca or only check EH once every week...).

Anyway, take it easy and enjoy the ride, better than doing nothing, no?
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is online now Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  November 7,2009, 7:54am
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The others have covered most of it. This topic has been the subject of many threads so you may want to search through some of the other threads.

However, most (about 90%) of your matches are non-paying members who can't communicate. Most non-paying members are non-active meaning they will not view you or close.

As for how long it takes, as the others have said it varies and for all the reasons that have been mentioned.

As for how long to wait I will wait until there is a FCW to give the ones that are not paying members an opportunity to communicate. When the FCW is over I then go through my matches and close out the ones that never communicated.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is online now Gr8Guyn2008 Post #9  November 7,2009, 7:59am
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bob819 wrote :
How do you sway a match who thinks you live to far to start a relationship,when evey thing else is good
If they are not interested in a LDR there is very little that you can say or do that will change their mind. Now there are different ideas of what a long distance is and if your match has in mind that she doesn't want to travel more than 30 minutes but you are an hour away and are willing to always go to her area then you may be able to get her to give it a try. If you can get her to communicate.
 
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