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eH_Advice_Host_Kate's Avatar

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Hi Emme,

Gr8guyn2008 is right that you can turn off the Flexible Matching by making all the settings “Very Important” on the sliding bar that appears below each setting on your My Settings page.

I think that there’s an unnecessary stigma sometimes to matches labeled as Flexible. I agree also with Gr8guyn2008 and Captcrunch23 in this regard. ALL matches will still be highly compatible, so a match identified as Flexible may actually strike your fancy more than a “regular” match.

Gr8guyn2008 mentioned that you can’t tell in which area the match is flexible. That may be true if you have several settings marked as “Somewhat Important” on your My Settings page. However, there are ways to determine what makes them flexible. If you want to keep multiple settings flexible, you could just wait till you are further along in communication to find out by asking your match. Otherwise, you could “experiment” with your Match Settings by making only one setting Flexible a week, and see what results you get, and if you feel comfortable leaving that setting Flexible.

All the best,

~Kate
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- November 1st, 2009, 01:42 pm
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CaptCrunch23 wrote :
At some point your regular matches will dry up and those flexible matches won't look so bad any more.

I know this is cliche, but you never know who might float your boat. Plus it's fairly simple to just close them after a quick glance.


Cap is right. You NEVER know. I recently had a "flexible match" and I was about to close it up since the first few that I had were terribly off in the age aspect. For some reason I was getting them too young..lol Seriously though, One has come through and we're talking a lot and there maybe something there so you never know.
- November 1st, 2009, 10:09 pm
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I would simply prefer an option to click something that prevented flexible matching altogether. Those who want it can click yes, those who don't, click no. Seems simple enough.
- November 2nd, 2009, 05:11 pm
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qubert75's Avatar

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I too would prefer not to receive flexible matches, I've met a few in person and I can see why they were "flexible" - the compatability just wasn't there.

I was able to stop receiving them by expanding my search criteria to world-wide. Of course now I'm getting matched up with guys that live in Australia and Europe but heck, maybe the guy for me doesn't live in the U.S.
- November 2nd, 2009, 08:49 pm
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